Monday, February 25, 2013

Week Ten: Take The Sheet Off Your Face, Boy, It's A Brand New Day!

Golly, dear blog reader, but this week's Spiral was really rather bloody, was it not? These were two episodes in which almost all of the various characters were, seemingly, being cruelly manipulated for someone else's benefit. And, you know, in one case getting themselves shot in the head. Which, thinking about it, is probably worse. Sometimes, the manipulation was actually a beneficial situation – horrible Herville being deliciously outmanoeuvred by Judge Roban into using Laure, his best officer, to lead his raids, is the prime example ('She's absolutely astonishing. It's just a shame she's so unpleasant!') But in other cases, it was hard to see any obvious exit strategy which doesn't involve career destruction, or violent bloodshed. Or, indeed, both at the same time. Pierre Clément and Joséphine Karlsson, in particular, seem stuck on a highway of imminent disaster with no obvious turn-off to a nearby b-road in sight. And, then there's Gilou. Goodness only knows how these disparate threads are going to be drawn together, and provide some definitive answers before the series concludes. Of the main cast, only Laure and Tintin seemed to come out of this double bill relatively free of error – and given that Tintin spent most of his time in a coma then woke only to give his colleagues the finger before bursting into tears at a dramatically inappropriate moment that's genuinely not saying much. That Laure managed, for two entire episodes, to somehow not majorly mess anything up, instead appearing blissfully happy with Vincent, is little short of astonishing. it's not all sweetness and light, however. Without Tintin around the office, Laure and Gilou became like squabbling siblings, each knowing exactly which buttons to push to wind the other one up. Some viewers may have found the false jeopardy of the storyline somewhat frustrating (Is Tintin dead? No, but he's in a coma. Is he ever going to wake up again? Maybe not. Oh, hang on, he has). But it worked for this blogger and, within an episode, we're all heading over to Tintin's never-previously-seen gaff for some champagne and a barbecue. Nice. That said, the team's ridiculous caper as they broke into his room at the hospital, and the moment when the impact of the trauma and his colleagues' thoughtful gift hit home were two of the great moments of the series so far. If Gilou hadn't been so busy smuggling an illegal gun out of his best friend's basement, maybe he could have substituted some comforting words for the highly awkward bluster and evasion. Which brings us to a very obvious question - exactly how does Gilou get himself into these tangled messes?
He has, after all, now supplied an illegal (one would hope, untraceable) gun to the Sarahoui brothers, who not only used it to shoot his informer, but - seemingly deliberately - left Gilou's own card at the scene of the crime. That's after the brothers returned his police gun to him but empty of bullets. Now he's really on the hook – and all because he wanted a tip-off for a raid. There's not a line of snow nor dodgy hooker in sight, yet he's still got himself involved with the underworld's hardest and meanest. Elsewhere, Umit Çetin has been picked up, but with only one of the two chests of serious weaponry that Herville has - rashly - promised to deliver to his bosses. The gun-running storyline also produced two superb lines of dialogue, both from Laure. When she shows Herville the recovered SIM card found in a dead criminals colon, Herville asks 'Where's this from?' 'From his arse, sir,' she replies matter-of-factly. Better still is her frustrated response to Çetin's feigned ignorance about the guns just found in his pond: 'It's your garden, you knobhead!' Excellent translation there, Beeb4. There wasn't much from Nutter Thomas and his curiously mute anarchist scum gang this week. They are, seemingly, planning to kidnap Joseph Vandernburg, head of the Belgian Property Office, who is headed for Paris to sign a contract to build a new prison outside Ostende. Their numbers have been swelled by the arrival of Yannis Tzakari, apparently released for killing a police officer on a technicality, who Riffaut says actually had his leg smashed with an iron bar. This is the sort of thing Spiral does very well: lull you into believing a described series of events, and then have them challenged by its most unsympathetic character. Riffault also put pictures up on his Cop Watch website, thanks to Joséphine. Providing names and photographs in such circumstances is bad enough, although she did at least avoid revealing their addresses. Thus far, the site had only eight hundred and forty seven online views - a bit like From The North on most days - and one imagines many of them are Riffault himself. Again, a bit like From The North. But, perhaps I've said too much.
Elsewhere Joséphine at last opens up to Pierre and reveals the backstory which has made her so hard and mean: betrayed by the police, she and her sister were sent to boarding school and their mother eventually committed suicide. It was a moving scene, and one which helped to explain a great deal in terms of three-and-a-half series of character motivation. But, despite sharing her past, Joséphine seems determined to keep Pierre at arms length in the present – even as he is busy declaring his love for her to a rather queasy-looking Laure; except, of course, for moments when Joséphine needs to save her own skin and sex seems to be the best distraction available. Special Branch, however, have also noticed Karlsson's charms – hence their demand that she gets as close to Riffaut as possible. Blackmailing Joséphine over the one occasion that she bent the rules to do someone other than herself some good, rather than ill, is a truly delicious irony. They also suggest that Pierre will be ruined, careerwise, if she is. The exchanges were spiky in the extreme: 'You defend terrorists.' 'Not especially.' Therefore, the question must be asked, why did Joséphine decide to become a double agent? Is it because that she doesn't like being bossed about? Or, because of her distrust and distaste of the police runs so deep? It's probably too much to hope for that Roban will be able to unmask Garnier's corruption, with Machard's blessing no less, and to be proved right. Instead, his decision to release Raulic on the basis of both an alibi and an eye witness who could not identify him seems to have backfired quite spectacularly with the suicide of poor Marie Bordel. This is a result that Roban could probably have foreseen during his interview with a clearly distressed Marie. The judge's reaction, crumpling against the wall, summed up the situation: his actions have - however indirectly - prompted the death of a young woman, he's now on record as telling the press that Garnier rigged the case and Machard may no longer be an ally. As Machard reminded him: 'It is always personal.' This from a man who'd earlier declared, seemingly in all honesty, 'I'd have sold my soul if I had one!' Tune in next week for yet more back-stabbing and intrigue.

Australian Doctor Who fans attending the Whovention: Gold event this weekend were fortunate enough to see a preview of the animated fourth episode of the forthcoming The Tenth Planet DVD. Clips from the animated episode were shown during panels hosted by Dan Hall and Austen Atkinson of the Australian based animation company Planet Fifty Five Studios. During the panel a number of animated clips were shown, including the famous William Hartnell regeneration scene and other behind the scenes material. Video from the animated episode will, reportedly, be available next week on the doctorwho.tv website. Also featured on the panels were Planet Fifty Five Studios animators Colin Bennett, Josh Campbell and Chris Chapman who discussed the pain-staking hours of work required to recreate the missing episode of The Tenth Planet as well as the two animated episodes from the newly restored Reign of Terror DVD. Atkinson confirmed that work on the animated Tenth Planet episode was likely to be completed in the next month with the DVD release due in the second half of 2013. Hall also confirmed that an announcement on whether the missing episodes of the forthcoming The Ice Warriors DVD would be similarly animated will be announced in the near future.
And so, dear blog reader to the latest set of yer actual Top Telly Tips:-

Saturday 2 March
In the final episode of Howard Goodall's Story of Music - 9:00 BBC2 - the composer examines the history of the past one hundred years in music, known as The Popular Age. During this period, classical music - as it is now termed - seemed to be in decline, but Howard argues that while some cutting-edge works proved too challenging to be appreciated by the mainstream audience, the DNA of the genre is alive and well in musical theatre, cinema and popular music.

Regular Spiral viewers might well benefit from a pair of second-hand night-vision goggles and a powerful torch as so much of the action in tonight's two episodes takes place in the dark - 9:00 BBC4. We are talking about industrial levels of noir here. Tonight there's a stake-out as Laure Berthaud and her gang track the gun-runners. It's one of those typically messy, screwed-up Spiral-type situations where an operation doesn't go anywhere close to being as planned. As well as the lack of light there's an added difficulty in that poor Tintin, who has just returned to work after being shot in the head is, quite understandably, suffering from a severe crisis of confidence and more than a smidgen of post traumatic stress disorder. Meanwhile, the excellent François Roban, who somehow manages to combine world-weariness with mischief and a razor sharp humour, is rapidly losing the few friends he has left. After his highly controversial decision on the rape case, his colleagues in the judiciary make no secret of the fact they are out to get him. With typical sang froid, Roban doesn't let it bother him and gets on with the job. Berthaud and her team are frustrated with new custody laws that ensure the presence of a lawyer during interviews and Roban is warned that Garnier is using underhand tactics to try and smear him. Meanwhile, Karlsson is pressured by the Special Branch to provide information on the activities of nutter Thomas Riffaut and his gang of anarchist scum. In the following episode Gilou uses the opportunity of a police raid on the Sarahouis' flat to break into their nightclub and retrieve evidence they hold against him, while Yussuf cracks under pressure and provides the team with the names of those behind the cache of weapons at Cetin's house. Elsewhere, Karlsson turns the tables on her Special Branch investigators. Hurrah! A case, very definitely, of not tonight Josephine!

King Joffrey's tyrannical rule prompts the people of King's Landing to riot, with near devastating consequences for Sansa in the latest episode of Game of Thrones - 11:10 Sky Atlantic. Meanwhile, beyond The Wall, Qhorin gives Jon a chance to prove himself. And across, the Narrow Sea, Daenerys' resolve strengthens as she vows to reclaim what she believes is rightfully hers. Fantasy drama, starring Emilia Clarke.

Sunday 3 March
In Time Team - 4:25 Channel Four - Tony Robinson and the team try to piece together the complete picture of the Manor of More, a once impressive structure masterminded by Henry VIII's right-hand man, Cardinal Wolsey. The palace had been pretty much forgotten about until the 1950s, when a group of pupils at Northwood School in Hertfordshire discovered its remains beneath their playing field. One of them joins the team on an adventure of discovery, observing remains dating back to the Sixteenth Century.
In the first of a two-part Top Gear special edition - 8:00 BBC2 - (which was originally supposed to be the motoring show's Christmas Special) Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May visit Africa on a mission to find the definitive source of The Nile, the world's longest river, which spans more than four thousand miles miles. The trio believe they can do a better job than various explorers who claim to have discovered the waterway's starting point by travelling further and faster than previous efforts - but the only tools at their disposal are determination, ingenuity and three ageing estate cars. With The Stig's Egyptian cousin. Probably.
Mayday - 9:00 BBC1 - is a drama shown over five nights about the search for a missing teenage girl in a Sussex town and its impact on several locals, who suspect their loved ones of being responsible. It's May Day and the members of a small community go about their business as they wait for this year's parade to begin. But when the May Queen - local teenager Hattie Sutton - fails to appear, several townsfolk are sent spinning by the suspicion that someone among them has taken her. Sophie Okonedo, Aidan Gillen, Peter Firth and Lesley Manville star. Continues tomorrow.

On February 15, a meteor exploded over Russia's Ural mountains and sent fireballs blazing to earth, injuring more than one thousand people. Just a day later, an asteroid passed within seventeen thousand miles of Earth. These were reminders that the planet's journey through space is fraught with danger. Professor Iain Stewart explores what meteorites and asteroids are, where they come from, the risks they pose and the role they have played in Earth's history in a Horizon special The Truth About Meteors - 9:00 BBC2.
Monday 4 March
Out-of-town Detective Inspector Alec Hardy investigates the mysterious death of an eleven-year-old boy in an idyllic seaside community, aided by local girl Detective Sergeant Ellie Miller, who has her work cut out dealing with her unyielding new boss in the opening episode of the much-trailed Broadchurch - 9:00 ITV. Meanwhile, the sadness of losing their child consumes Beth and Mark Latimer as they and the other residents of the village of Broadchurch try to cope with the media frenzy surrounding the case. Crime drama, featuring a genuinely once-in-a-lifetime cast; it stars former national heartthrob David Tennant, Olivia Colman, Andrew Buchan, Jodie Whittaker, Arthur Darvill, Vicky McClure and Pauline Quirke. Looks proper decent from the evidence of the trailer.

The quarter-finals of University Challenge continue - 8:00 BBC2 - as Manchester and University College London battle it out, with teams having to win two matches to progress to the semi-finals. Jeremy Paxman asks the questions and terrifies the students. Which, let's face it, is always funny.

Manchester United: Munich Air Crash 10:00 Channel Five - is, as you might expect, an investigation into the disaster, which occurred on 6 February 1958, when Manchester United's famous Busby Babes were returning from a European Cup match in Belgrade in what was then Yugoslavia. The aircraft stopped in Munich for refuelling, but crashed during a third take-off attempt, killing twenty three of the forty four people on board, including eight of the players and three members of the club's staff. Using accident reports, eyewitness accounts and state-of-the-art CGI, this documentary attempts to shed new light on the tragedy and uncover exactly what happened.
Tuesday 5 March
In the latest episode of CSI - 9:00 Channel Five - Russell and the team investigate the fatal shootings of eight people at a local diner, initially believing the culprit to be a man who was infatuated with one of those who died. However, the case is complicated when it is revealed a male victim was due to testify at a forthcoming trial and was on a witness protection scheme. Crime drama, starring Ted Danson and George Eads.
The Crash - 9:00 BBC3 - is a two-part drama following the story of a car crash involving a close-knit group of friends. Kate returns from university for her Christmas break and reunites with her boyfriend Tom and companions Rachel, Ethan, Ashley, Brian and Leah for a night out. The youngsters pile into two cars, but a fatal accident on the way devastates their families and the survivors, and leaves questions about who was to blame. Former Coronation Street actress Sacha Parkinson and Lily Loveless from Skins star.
Sara meets a Dutch action hero and embarks on her course of life coaching with Toria in the second episode of Heading Out - 10:00 BBC2. But, a hypnosis session has unfortunate consequences for Justine. Meanwhile, Daniel is feeling undervalued at work and lets out his frustrations on the paintball battlefield. Comedy, written by and starring Sue Perkins, with Joanna Scanlan, Nicola Walker, Steve Oram and Tony Law.

Wednesday 6 March
In Michael Grade and the World's Oldest Joke - 9:00 BBC4 - the broadcast executive traces the history of the joke with a little help from a host of historians, academics, comedy experts and stand-ups. These include Ken Dodd, Tim Vine and Barry Cryer. Along the way Michael discovers what tickled the Tudors, ribbed the Romans, lightened the Dark Ages and made yer actual Renaissance wits roar as he sets out to discover whether jokes come and go with the rise and fall of civilisations, or whether people are still laughing at - essentially - the same things their ancestors did. A fascinating conceit, well worth an hour of your time.

The body of a teenage boy is found in an abandoned greenhouse surrounded by wasp nests in the latest episode of Bones - 9:00 Sky Living. The team calls on psychic Avalon Harmonia to contact the youngster and provide an insight into his death. She senses the spirit of the boy will haunt Brennan and Booth until they bring his killer to justice, forcing the believers and sceptics on the Jeffersonian team to begin to reassess their views on life after death. Guest starring, Cyndi Lauper. Who still can't act.
Alastair Sooke presents a cultural history of the London Underground to celebrate its one hundred and fiftieth anniversary in Going Underground: A Culture Show Special - 10:00 BBC2. He follows the progress of a major new artwork for all 270 stations by Turner Prize winner Mark Wallinger and tells the story of Frank Pick, who steered the development of the Tube's corporate identity by commissioning eye-catching commercial art, graphic design and modern architecture. With contributions by writers Paul Morley, Peter York and John Lanchester.
Thursday 7 March
The Hindenburg was one of the great engineering feats of the early Twentieth Century, but on 6 May 1937, disaster struck when the airship crashed in New Jersey, killing thirty five of the ninety seven people on board, a story told in What Destroyed the Hindenburg? - 9:00 Channel Four. Ever since, the cause of the tragedy has remained a mystery, with a static electric charge, a design flaw and an act of sabotage all blamed by experts. In this programme, a team including aeronautical engineer Jem Stansfield puts the leading theories to the test with the help of three scale models.
The opening episode of Heritage! The Battle for Britain's Past - 9:00 BBC4 - looks at the birth of heritage movement and the primary arguments of radical thought from people such as John Lubbock MP, Lt Gen Augustus Henry Lane, Fox Pitt Rivers, Charles Darwin and John Ruskin who asked important questions to create the building blocks of a new world, sparking the first piece of legislation which safeguarded prehistoric and ancient structures.

In the latest The Sky At Night - 7:30 BBC4 - the impressively down to Earth new presenting duo of Chris Lintott and Lucy Green are joined by good old Jon Culshaw at the beautiful Kielder observatory in Northumberland to share the results of Patrick Moore's winter marathon, which saw him challenge viewers to seek out a list of celestial objects visible in the night sky. The programme also follows the observers as they set up their telescopes in the hope of catching a glimpse of asteroid 2012 DA14, which last month passed closer to Earth than any such object of its size.
Friday 8 March
The Ballad of Mott the Hoople - 10:00 BBC4 - is a documentary telling the story of Hereford rock band Mott the Hoople, whose best-known hit, All the Young Dudes, was written for them by David Bowie. The film features rare and previously unseen footage, with contributions by former band members Ian Hunter, Mick Ralphs and Verden Allen, as well as Queen's Roger Taylor and ex-Clash guitarist Mick Jones.
In The Review Show - 11:00 BBC2 - Clemency Burton-Hill and guests review Oz the Great and Powerful - the Disney prequel to The Wizard of Oz, and Booker Prize winner JM Coetzee's latest novel The Childhood of Jesus. They also look at Helen Mirren's part in Peter Morgan's play The Audience, in which she reprises her role as the Queen.

And so to the news: Tom Ellis has ruled out starring in the next series of Downton Abbey. The Miranda actor was rumoured to have auditioned for the role of Lady Mary's new love ­interest and been shortlisted by producers. An alleged ITV 'source' allegedly told some tabloid or other - but, probably, didn't: 'It was an absolute no-brainer to get him in for an audition. We know that Tom's got a lot of other options at the moment but if he does get the role it will be an incredible opportunity for him. A lot of the current cast have become global superstars. And it is always a bit of a coup for us to attract a major BBC star to a flagship ITV show like Downton Abbey.' However, Ellis has since tweeted: 'It's been lovely to hear all the congrats for Downton but the truth is I'm not going to be in it. But thank you for your messages.' Ellis recently signed up to play Victor Frankenstein in new ABC pilot Gothica.

EastEnders' Scott Maslen has announced that he is stepping down from his role as Jack Branning. The actor, who has been playing Jack since 2007, will depart the series at the end of his contract later this year. Maslen said: 'I've loved playing Jack, and who wouldn't want to work on one of the most successful British TV series, but I've been offered many other roles and just not been able to explore them in the past, simply because of time and commitments to EastEnders, and so now it feels like the time to tread a new path for a while. I've played Jack for five and a half years and had some fantastic storylines, but it's now time to have a break from him and try something different. I'm incredibly attached to Jack, his family and EastEnders, but as an actor I'd like to take on some new challenges for a bit. EastEnders is just incredible, it's phenomenally rewarding and I love working here, but now it's time to move on to pastures new.' EastEnders' executive producer Lorraine Newman added: 'Since October 2007, Scott Maslen has brought the wonderful Jack Branning to life on our screens. From Scott's heart-wrenching portrayal of a grieving father, to Jack's determination in the coming week to take on Phil Mitchell, the variety in Scott's material shows his fabulous range as an actor. Scott will remain on your screens until late in the year, and there is plenty more drama to be played out before his departure.'

Yer actual Keith Telly Topping's beloved (though unsellable) Newcastle United came from behind to win an open and absorbing game against Southampton in the Premier League on Sunday. Morgan Schneiderlin lashed in a shot for the visitors early on before Moussa Sissoko equalised with a six-yard tap in. A stunning twenty five-yard dipping strike from Papiss Demba Cisse gave the Magpies the lead only for Ricky Lambert to net at the near-post just after the break. Danny Fox's handball allowed Yohan Cabaye to score from the spot before Jos Hooiveld's own goal sealed a home win. It was the first time Newcastle had won a league game this season after conceding the opening goal and the victory moved them up to fourteenth in the League, six points clear of the drop zone. The performance also continued their upturn in form since they reinforced their squad with a number of signings in the January transfer window, with Alan Pardew's side claiming three wins from their last four top flight matches and progressing to the last sixteen of the Europa League. Southampton provided a severe test for their opponents but were brought back down to earth after beating champions Sheikh Yer Man City in their last game. They are now three points above the relegation zone. It was 'French Day' at St James' Park in honour of the club's heavy contingent of players signed from across the Channel but it was a Frenchman for Southampton who opened the scoring after just three minutes. Jack Cork's diagonal cross from the right was nodded down by Lambert and Schneiderlin turned and half-volleyed a shot past Magpies keeper Rob Elliot, whose Premier League debut in place of the injured Tim Krul started in inauspicious circumstances. Pardew was ruthlessly sacked as Southampton manager by the then-League One club in August 2010 and his current team mirrored his desire to win the match as they pressed for an equaliser. Southampton defender Hooiveld twice survived handball claims against him. Firstly, a Cisse pass came off team-mate Luke Shaw and hit Hooiveld's arm, while the ball also appeared to strike the centre-back's arm as he blocked a Steven Taylor shot. Both instances appeared to be more ball to hand than the other way around but indicated Newcastle were threatening a goal, which was deservedly provided by Sissoko. The darting Yoan Gouffran's shot was saved by keeper Artur Boruc but Sissoko was on hand to slot in the loose ball for his third goal since joining the Magpies last month. United went ahead when Cisse, who might have initially been offside, produced a spectacular long range strike on the half-volley after keeper Elliot had launched a long ball forward. Southampton regrouped and equalised shortly after the break when Lambert turned in a low Adam Lallana cross at the near post for his one hundredth goal for the South Coast club. However, a Mathieu Debuchy cross struck the outstretched arm of Southampton left-back Fox and Cabaye confidently scored form the spot to restore Newcastle's lead. Gaston Ramirez might have rescued a point for Southampton but, after his initial shot was saved, his follow-up struck the crossbar. And, later Fox's clearance from Davide Santon's left-wing cross inexplicably struck Hooiveld on its way into the Saints goal to secure Newcastle's deserved victory. In the day's other Premiership game, Sheikh Yer Man City beat a very poor looking Moscow Chelski FC 2-0.
The coolest man alive Johnny Marr has said that fans need to stop assuming their 'life will be complete' if The Smiths reform. Johnny was asked in an interview with NPR.org about being constantly besieged by fans and interviewers who ask if the band he formed with Morrissey will ever get back together. He replied: '[Fans] hope there will be some big happy ending. The fact is, there is a happy ending — I'm happy. It's all cool. It's slightly difficult when people assume that your life will be complete, or everybody's life will be complete, if this band from twenty five years ago reforms.' Marr went on to say that 'life doesn't need that to happen for things to be okay' and suggested that fans looking for some positive enlightenment should give up hoping for The Smiths to reform and 'go see the Dalai Lama or something that'll make you feel better.' It was confirmed this month that Johnny is to be named Godlike Genius at this year's NME Awards. The guitarist, who has also played with The The, Electronic, Modest Mouse and The Cribs in his career, will pick up the prize when he attends the awards ceremony, which takes place on 27 February.

Detroit has been named 'the most miserable city' in the US in a new Forbes ranking. The city topped the poll ahead of cities like Chicago, New York and last year's 'most miserable city' Miami, Yahoo! News reports. Forbes studied two hundred urban areas, taking into account factors such as crime rates, foreclosures, taxes, home prices, commute times, weather and decreasing populations. It said: 'Detroit's problems are hardly news. It has been in a four-decade decline paralleling the slide in the US auto industry.' Earlier this week, it emerged that the city is on the verge of bankruptcy and will potentially be taken over by the state in a bid to resolve issues. Other cities in the top ten included Chicago and New York. Chicago was at number four as a result of its high rates of violent crime, high foreclosure rates and declining home prices. It is also along the most expensive urban areas to live in the US. New York (number ten) was included for its high living costs too. It also has one of the country's highest income tax rates and the longest average commute time of thirty six minutes.

Cleotha Staples of the chart-topping gospel group The Staple Singers, has died at the age of seventy eight. The family group had eight US top forty singles in the 1970s, including 'Respect Yourself' and the number ones 'I'll Take You There' and 'Let's Do It Again'. They enjoyed huge success on the Stax label and Curtis Mayfield's Curtom label. Friend and publicist Bill Carpenter said Cleotha suffered from Alzheimer's. Her sister Mavis paid tribute to Cleotha's 'soothing' voice. 'A lot of singers would try to sing like her,' Mavis said in a statement. 'Her voice would just ring in your ear. It wasn't harsh or hitting you hard, it was soothing. She gave us that country sound.' The group, which also featured father Pops, sister Yvonne and brother Pervis, began singing in church in Chicago in 1948. During their early career they recorded in an acoustic gospel-folk style with various labels like Vee-Jay Records (their 'Uncloudy Day' and 'Will The Circle Be Unbroken?' were best sellers), Checker, Riverside and then Epic Records in 1965. It was on Epic that The Staple Singers began moving into mainstream pop markets, with 'Why (Am I Treated So Bad)' and an astonishing cover of Stephen Stills' 'For What It's Worth' in 1967. A year later, The Staple Singers signed to Stax and released two LP back by Steve Cropper and Booker T & the MG's — Soul Folk in Action and We'll Get Over. By 1970, Al Bell had become their producer and the family began recording at the famed Muscle Shoals Sound Studio moving in a more funk and soul direction. They were inducted into the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame in 1999 and received a Grammy lifetime achievement award in 2005. Neil Portnow, president of the Recording Academy, which organises the Grammy Awards, described them as 'one of Stax Records' most important and successful acts. Their songs spread messages of hope, brotherhood and self-respect through some of R&B's finest and most passionate voices, and their music remains as vital today as when it was recorded,' he said. 'Music has suffered a great loss, and our thoughts and condolences are with her family, friends and all those who have been moved and influenced by her strong, soulful voice.'

So, here's today Keith Telly Topping's 45 of the Day dear blog reader. This one's for Cleotha.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

One Way Conversations Do Not Work Somehow

Jenna-Louise Coleman her very self has 'revealed' that she knew very little about Doctor Who when she auditioned to play the new companion. Not that there's any particular reason why she should, of course, it's not a deal-breaker. Coleman discussed her lack of exposure to the popular family SF drama with the Evening Standard, revealing that being unfamiliar with the series may have actually helped her. 'I didn't really know anything about Doctor Who but Steven [Moffat] liked that,' Coleman recalled. '[Being unfamiliar with the show] meant that when I went into the audition with Matt Smith I could be more spontaneous because I didn't know him as The Doctor. And the plot seemed to evolve from audition to audition, with more scenes being written, and characters being introduced. There were times when I thought they had no idea what they wanted.' Coleman made her surprise first appearance in Doctor Who's series seven opener Asylum of the Daleks and returned at Christmas for The Snowmen. Her role as The Doctor's latest companion means she will be travelling to San Diego Comic-Con this summer, a prospect that Coleman says she is very excited about. 'I am going to Comic-Con this year. Matt told me that last year someone dressed as a TARDIS was sitting in the front row of the audience,' she declared. Yeah. They do that. Coleman previously expressed excitement about her part in Doctor Who's fiftieth anniversary celebrations.

Ross Noble has landed a new comedy travelogue series for UKTV channel Dave, which will involve him being directed by Twitter users. Ross Noble Freewheeling will be a six-part series which puts the stand-up comic's fate entirely in the hands of the general public. Which sounds like a fantastically bad idea to this blogger since they're a collective you never, not ever, want to allow to control your destiny. Noble is famous for improvisation in his comedy routines and the show will follow a similar style with everyone able to suggest scenarios and take part. The show has been described as 'an anti-travelogue, a revealing comic journey and a fascinating insight into modern Britain.' Described by whom, the report does not state. Probably 'some bloke' off the streets. 'I can't promise this programme will be either insightful or that revealing but it's definitely a programme,' joked Noble. UKTV commissioner Richard Watsham said: 'Ross Noble is the ultimate comic improviser but even so it's a brave thing to do to put yourself in the hands of the fans and take whatever is thrown at you. This format absolutely plays to his strengths however and I'm confident that the combination of innovation and humour with a really modern feel will appeal to a broad audience.' Executive producer James Woodroffe added: 'I'm slightly worried this could be my last job in TV.'

No decision has been made on the future of the judging line-up of The X Factor, an ITV spokesman has claimed. It follows reports that Tulisa Contostavlos is to be replaced on the panel in 2013 as part of 'a revamp.' The 2012 series had some of the lowest ratings since the show began in 2004. The X Factor panel was made up of Tulisa, Louis Walsh, former Pussycat Dolls singer Nicole Scherzinger and Gary Barlow. An X Factor spokesperson said: 'No formal decisions have been made about the panel for this year's series of The X Factor as yet.' As if anybody actually gives a horse's knob about trivial balderdash such as the likes of this.
Meanwhile, Wee Shughie McFee, the sour-faced Scottish chef off Crossroads has claimed that he asked David Bowie to join The X Factor judging panel. And one is sure that, once the Grand Dame her very self had finished laughing like the laughing gnome its very self, she told Wee Shughie McFee, the sour-faced Scottish chef off Crossroads that he was havin' a larf.
The original designer of The Daleks has died aged eighty four after a short illness, his daughter has said. Former BBC designer Ray Cusick died of heart failure in his sleep on Thursday, Claire Heawood added. The Daleks became the iconic villains in popular long-running family SF drama Doctor Who, which is due to mark its fiftieth anniversary with events later this year. Cusick, from Horsham, leaves two daughters and seven grandchildren, his family said. The official Doctor Who Magazine tweeted: 'It's with great sadness that we report the death of Ray Cusick - the designer of The Daleks. Half-a-century on, his iconic design lives on.' Doctor Who actor and writer Mark Gatiss tweeted: 'Farewell to the great Ray Cusick. His passing is especially sad in this anniversary year but his creation remains immortal.' The designer gave form to the concept of The Daleks, created by screenwriter Terry Nation and which first appeared in episode five of Doctor Who nearly fifty years ago. In the show, the race of Daleks was said to have been developed by a scientist to survive a war on their home planet of Skaro. However, the scientist, Davros, was later killed by his own creation. The Daleks, mutants encased in studded, tank-like machinery which appear to glide over the ground, became a cultural sensation, with generations growing to love their famous electronic command of 'Exterminate.' In a 2008 episode of BBC3's Doctor Who Confidential, Cusick visited the BBC props department and explained his inspiration for the design of The Daleks, which has changed very little over the years. 'People do say I was inspired by a pepper pot - but I always think "If that's all it takes to become a designer then it's a doddle!"' He explained that, in fact, the pepper pot detail came from a lunch with Bill Roberts, the special effects expert who would make The Daleks, when Cusick picked up a pepper pot and moved it around the table, telling him: 'It's going to move like that - no visible means.' 'Ever since then people, say I was inspired by a pepper pot - but it could have been the salt pot I picked up,' he noted. 'When I'm asked what I was inspired by I suppose it was really a system of logic because I realised that you've got to have an operator to operate them. If you had anything mechanical, ten to one on the take it would go wrong, so you've got a human being in there who would be absolutely totally reliable. I then thought "Well, the operator's got to sit down", [so I] drew a seat, ergonomic height, eighteen inches, got the operator down, and then drew round him. That's how the basic shape appeared.' David Graham, who created the original voice of The Daleks, said that the creatures' success in frightening generations of viewers was a combination of 'brilliant design' and the synthesised voice added to it. He said Cusick was responsible for 'one of the most iconic designs of television sci-fi. They captured the imagination of so many people. It was a wonderful thing,' he told BBC Radio 5Live's Stephen Nolan Show. Born in London in 1928, Cusick became interested in engineering while still at art school, and began attending evening classes. However, his father wanted him to follow a more regular career, so Cusick took a course in Mathematics and Science, intending to become a civil engineer. Not finding this to his liking, he enlisted instead in the army and was stationed in Palestine. On his return to England he completed a teacher training course, but then obtained a nine-month position in repertory theatre at the Prince of Wales Theatre in Cardiff. In the late 1950s, Ray took a position teaching art but then noticed an advertisement placed by Granada Television for designers on a show, Chelsea at Nine, which was recorded at the Chelsea Palace Theatre. Cusick then joined the BBC as a staff designer responsible for set design on a large number of Doctor Who stories, designing not just futuristic settings but also historical sets and diorama. Cusick worked on a large variety of television programmes for the BBC including comedy, variety, drama, single plays, and films. According to legend, if Ray hadn't been sitting at his desk on the day that Verity Lambert arrived asking for a design for The Daleks, the job may well have gone to his colleague in the design department, the young Ridley Scott. As Cusick was a BBC employee at the time he designed The Daleks, he was on a salary and was not paid royalties. Given the large revenue generated by merchandise featuring Cusick's Dalek design. Despite this, the BBC did recognise his contribution with an ex-gratia payment. Cusick himself never asked for more money; just to be recognised as the designer. Outside of Doctor Who, Ray worked on a variety of BBC shows including Out of The Unknown, Dr Finlay's Casebook, The Pallisers, The Duchess of Duke Street, Rentaghost, When The Boat Comes In and Play For Today. In the late 1970s, he was a designer for the James Burke's Connections. Upon his retirement he devoted a lot of time to his hobby, writing about the battles of the Napoleonic era. Retaining his interest over his creations, he was to be reunited with their modern equivalent during Doctor Who Confidential; he also recorded commentaries and appeared in features for the BBC Doctor Who DVD range. Nick Briggs, who voices the modern Daleks, said that the show would not be the same without them. 'Extinction is not an option - if you say Doctor Who to someone in the street about the second thing they're going to say is "Exterminate,"' he said. 'Lots of my friends who are not Doctor Who fans think that the programme is 'Doctor Who and The Daleks' - that surely The Daleks are in it all the time - which isn't true but that is the impression. That's the brilliance of the creation of The Daleks. They've made an indelible stamp on the series really.'

A London-based TV channel focused on Arabic culture and entertainment has been fined thirty thousand smackers over its coverage of a beauty pageant. Media regulator Ofcom found that Al-Alamia TV - broadcast in Arabic and English - had committed 'numerous broadcasting offences' during Miss Arab London in October 2011. These included unfair voting competitions, unauthorised product placement, and undue prominence for partner businesses. Miss Arab London was aired over four dates in 2011 on Al-Alamia TV, the channel that was broadcast on satellite in Europe and the Middle East, as well as online. During the live final on 29 October 2011, the programme invited viewers to vote for their favourite contestants via a premium rate text message, costing £1.50 per vote plus the standard network charge. But as a result of 'a number of errors' by Al-Alamia TV in relation to management of the voting system, Ofcom found that 'viewers had been materially misled and the vote had not been conducted fairly.' Before the final, pageant contestants were featured in three pre-recorded programmes, including segments where they visited businesses, who were credited as on-air sponsors. Ofcom considered that these sequences had been 'purposefully designed to promote the businesses.' The regulator said that the product placement logo was never broadcast during any of the programmes, and so the audience was not made aware of the references to sponsor companies. The channel was also found to have given 'undue prominence' to two of the businesses in the pre-recorded shows. Ofcom considered that the breaches were so serious that they required a financial penalty of thirty grand to be imposed on Biditis Limited, which held the licence for Al-Alamia TV. The channel has since ceased operations both on satellite and online.
Lord Patten, the BBC Trust chairman, has painted a vivid picture of the chaos which engulfed the corporation's senior management during last autumn's Savile fiasco, saying that there was an impression of 'frantic faffing about' around former director general George Entwistle. During his appearance before the BBC internal inquiry on the Savile fiasco, Patten was also asked if he was aware that the corporation's senior management planned to make Newsnight editor Peter Rippon 'the fall guy' for the crisis. Patten said that he not aware of this. He blamed the 'horrible screw-up' surrounding the Savile fiasco on the Chinese-style management legacy of the corporation's former director general Mark Thompson, as well as the failings of his successor George Entwistle. It has also emerged in Patten's evidence, published as part of The Pollard Report transcripts on Friday, that the former BBC director general John Birt tried to come to Entwistle's rescue, giving him advice in a note before his disastrous appearance before MPs on the Commons culture, media and sport select committee last October. Patten's evidence lifts the lid on both the extraordinary fifty four days of Entwistle's reign as director general but also 'a silo' management structure which he had inherited from Thompson, who left the BBC in September. Patten said that the corporation under Thompson, director general for eight years, had 'more senior leaders than China,' with twenty five to twenty seven staff on the senior management team. 'They never met,' Patten added. But he said that it wasn't lack of management at the BBC that caused things to be 'horribly screwed up' during the Savile fiasco – the problem was the weak team around Entwistle. 'I don't think the BBC needs more senior people in order to avoid making basic mistakes.' Patten said Entwistle's lack of knowledge of Newsnight's Savile sex abuse investigation, which was abandoned in December 2011 when the future director general was in charge of TV channels as BBC Vision director, was 'ironic' given how frequently during his interview for the top post he referred to the 'silo' culture which had taken root under Thompson. Entwistle 'talked a good game about all this' and reduced the number of managers on the senior leader's group to twelve or fewer, Patten told the Pollard inquiry. Patten was scathing about the 'chaotic' communications operation last October. He was asked about a decision to hire PR firm Brunswick and one of its senior executives, the former Sun editor Yelland, to advise Entwistle. This decision was quickly reversed. 'I thought to have David Yelland being trooped through the newsroom at the BBC to brief the director general, that seem to me to be a seriously lousy story,' Patten said. 'While we were pressing him to get a rather stronger team around him, the one thing we did suggest was that hiring Brunswick was not a very good idea.' Yelland has denied that he was hired or fired issuing this statement on Friday. 'For accuracy Brunswick at no point advised the BBC and nor did I. We were not fired as we were never hired or even met with them. They called us but that was it,' he said. The BBC corporate PR team also comes in for some heavy fire. Patten said the BBC's communications was 'chaotic' and some of the advice that Entwistle was getting 'for example on some of his own appearances, was, I think, pretty bizarre.' By way of contrast, he added that acting director general Tim Davie, who took over when Entwistle resigned in November, has 'two or three experienced people around him' and there is no longer this 'impression of frantic faffing about' when he walks into his office. There is also discussion in Patten's evidence of a secret BBC plan to make Rippon, who took the decision not to broadcast a Newsnight investigation into Savile sex abuse allegations in December 2011, 'the fall guy' for the crisis which ensued when the story eventually came out ten months later. Nick Pollard, the former head of Sky New who ran the inquiry, put it to Patten that the day after ITV's 3 October 2012 Savile sex abuse documentary there was 'a plan hatched' for Entwistle to make a statement, 'the intended purpose and effect of which would be compel Peter Rippon to resign.' Patten replied that he was 'not aware' of any such plan and the statement in question was never issued by the BBC. He confirmed to Pollard that Birt 'intervened' at one point but did not discuss the detail of his advice. 'I think John Birt gave perfectly good advice,' he said. Patten added that, ultimately, Entwistle was 'knocked sideways' when the culture select committee tried to 'pin him on the number of cases of sexual abuse that had been reported to the BBC' and although he could answer the question 'he was put off by the ranting.' Patten said that 'some people' at the BBC thought Rippon would make 'a convenient fall guy' and could be 'hung out to dry' but that the BBC Trust 'never got to that position.' Patten was also asked if he was aware that Entwistle had told the Pollard inquiry relationships within the BBC were 'just so poisoned and toxic.' Entwistle recalled how Meirion Jones, the Newsnight investigations producer who worked on the ditched Savile story, waited outside a lift 'for twenty minutes to half-an-hour' in the hope of catching him to discuss the issue. But Entwistle said he refused to talk to Jones because he thought Jones would leak details of their conversation to the Gruniad Morning Star or The Times 'before he got the words out of his mouth.' Pollard put it to Patten that one of the BBC's problems was that so few of its executives had outside experience. Appointing Entwistle as director general was going 'to perpetuate that problem of BBC lifers managing other BBC lifers,' he said. Patten responded that Entwistle 'was saying all the right things about how to manage the process better' in the first eleven days of his fifty four-day reign, but things began to unravel after the Savile fiasco blew up. Patten said he thought the handling of Rippon's 2 October blog explaining the decision to shelve Newsnight's Savile story, which was later found to contain some inaccuracies that were not corrected for three weeks, was 'ham-fisted. It does seem to me that there are reasonable grounds for assuming that people knew the blog was dodgy a lot earlier and that we were left defending something which wasn't true.' Patten added that he was 'able to glean' what was happening from 'reading the newspapers, in particular the stories that appeared in the Guardian' rather than BBC executive management. He also revealed how Entwistle initially persuaded him not to launch an inquiry into Newsnight's aborted Savile story in early October, shortly after ITV's documentary was broadcast. 'George persuaded me that wasn't a very good idea.' However, according to Patten, within twenty four hours Entwistle had changed his mind, but at this point it was too late for his own PR strategy. Patten had already committed to making his first comments to the media about the crisis which was engulfing the BBC, and had lined-up a Broadcasting Press Guild lunch with journalists and an interview on Radio 4's The Media Show with presenter Steve Hewlett explaining how an investigation would not be necessary. '[I] came out of the studio and George called me to say he thought I was now right, and that we should have this inquiry. So I just wished that the executive had come to a different view before I had done the lunch or the Steve Hewlett programme.' He also said that the absence of a deputy director general was 'not the issue' in terms of the BBC's failure to deal with the Savile fiasco. The corporation had scrapped the role following the departure of Mark Byford in 2011 and some critics have suggested this was 'the root of the problem' as it burdened the director general with too much responsibility. 'I don't think that the BBC needs more senior people in order to avoid making basic mistakes,' says Patten. 'In this case, you have a director general, a head of news, somebody responsible for current affairs and an experienced editor. Things still get horribly screwed up.'

Staff at the BBC's Persian service face satellite jamming, smear campaigns and intimidation, according to Peter Horrocks, director of the BBC World Service. In an article for Index on Censorship, he reveals that Iran's interference with the BBC's signals started in 2009 at the time of Iran's presidential election. Jamming began on election day and continued in the aftermath of the election during the street protests. Since then, he writes, the jamming of BBC Persian has 'continued intermittently.' Two weeks ago, on 9 February, during the Iranian government's anniversary celebrations of the Islamic Revolution, Persian TV was taken off the air in company with thirteen other broadcasters. Horrocks writes: 'In response, we have increased the number of satellites carrying the channel and technical changes were made to help reduce jamming on the original signal. However, more work needs to be done.' He calls for 'all stakeholders' in their different fields - technical, regulatory and political - to work together to address the issue of satellite jamming. He pointed to one 'very useful event' in January, organised by the satellite operator Eutelsat, in which it demonstrated how it locates interference to satellites in order to provide evidence to the UN agency, International Telecommunication Union. And, Horrocks praises Eutelsat for its decision to 'invest in technologies that identify sources of deliberate interference and make jamming more difficult.' As he also points out, the Iranian government has used 'other tactics' to restrict the free flow of information to its people. BBC Persian staff and their families have been subject to increasing harassment and intimidation. This has been accompanied by a widespread anti-BBC campaign in Iran. And in the Daily Scum Mail and Gruniad Morning Star as well, just for balance, you understand. Fake Facebook pages and fake blogs have allegedly been set up and then attributed to BBC Persian journalists in order to discredit them by accusing them of sexual promiscuity or acting as spies.

Billy Connolly - a well-known Scottish comedian - has revealed how he and the late Gerry Rafferty used rolled-up pages of a Bible to smoke spliff. The duo, who performed together as the folk group The Humblebums in the late 1960s, used the good book when they ran out of Rizlas at a remote Highland cottage where the had retreated to do some songwriting. Connolly said: 'My idea was to read a verse then smoke it. And I think I'm going to hell.' He added that was the last time he held a Bible.
The animator of much-loved cartoon series Roobarb and Henry's Cat has died aged ninety one, his family has confirmed. Bob Godfrey won an Oscar for his short film Great, a biography of the engineer Isambard Kingdom Brunel, but he remains best known for his TV work. The British animator - whose career spanned fifty years - was also responsible for Noah and Nelly in Skylark and the risqué cartoon series Henry Nine to Five. He was awarded three BAFTAs and received an MBE in June 1986. Godfrey was born in Australia, on 27 January 1921, but was educated in East London. He began his professional career as a graphic artist working in advertising, before joining the innovative Larkin Studio in the early 1950s where he made his earliest cartoons. In the mid-1950s, Godfrey joined up with Jeff Hale and Keith Learner, and later Nancy Hanna and Vera Linnecar, to form Biographic Films, making some of the first commercials for ITV. But he sought to work outside the American tradition, characterised by Disney - and typically took a more unorthodox view, producing work such as The Do It Yourself Cartoon Kit (1961). Working as Bob Godfrey Films, he cornered the market with his 'adult animation' such as Henry Nine to Five and Kama Sutra Rides Again, which earned him his first Oscar nomination - after it was entered for the awards by an American who bought the cartoon from him for one hundred and fifty pounds. It was closely followed by the Oscar-winning short Great, which satirised Victorian attitudes and the decline of the British Empire, won him the Academy Award and a BAFTA in 1976. 'I'd been reading a book about Brunel so I asked British Lion, who backed Kama Sutra, if I could have some money to make a half-hour cartoon about a Victorian engineer,' he told the Gruniad Morning Star in 2001. '"Yes", they said, "here's twenty thousand pounds." They'd have given me money to animate a toilet if I'd asked them.' It was during this period of his life that he animated the children's classic Roobarb, created by Grange Claveley and narrated by Richard Briers. The anarchic cartoon about a warring dog (the eponymous Roobarb) and cat (Custard), with its memorable theme tune and wobbly animation won a cult following, which continues to this day. Bob collaborated once again with Claveley and Briers on 1976's Noah and Nelly in Skylark, returning successfully to children's TV with Henry's Cat in the early 1980s. But he was at his happiest when he was pushing the boundaries of conventional animation, working alongside people like Spike Milligan and Michael Bentine, hob-nobbing with The Beatles and, later, becoming an inspiration for a young Terry Gilliam. Aardman Animations founder Peter Lord tweeted: 'Dear old Bob Godfrey is no more. A great influence and inspiration to me and my generation of animators. Also a lovely bloke.' Godfrey continued to work on commercials and TV commissions into his early eighties, producing his last work, Channel Four's Millennium: The Musical, in 1999. As a teacher of animation, he told the Gruniad: 'I teach the basics of animation, then it's up to the individual. Great illustrators don't always make great animators. I've known people who couldn't draw at all who were great animators. You can always spot the ones with real talent. They don't listen to you.'

Newcastle manager Alan Pardew believes that his side can give the Europa League 'a good go' after reaching the last sixteen with a 1-0 win at Metalist Kharkiv on Thursday. After a goalless home first leg, Shola Ameobi scored a penalty to set up a tie with Russian side Anzhi Makhachkala. Cheick Tiote and Hatem Ben Arfa were both missing from the win in Ukraine. Pardew said: 'With Ben Arfa coming back and Cheick to add to that side, I really feel as though we can give this competition a good go.' Having only just recovered from a hamstring injury, attacking midfielder Ben Arfa was not risked while Tiote was taken ill and replaced by Vurnon Anita. 'We lost Cheick just before the game, but Anita did an excellent job coming in late,' said the Magpies boss. 'He only knew an hour before we kicked off that he was going to play.' Pardew also praised Ameobi, who scored his fifteenth goal in European competition. Only Alan Shearer has scored more goals in Europe for yer actual Keith Telly Topping's beloved (though unsellable) Magpies. 'I had a little quiet word with Shola before the game because, in the last few weeks, I thought his contribution could have been greater,' Pardew said. 'But he's shown tonight what quality he has. Against this team, I always thought he might influence the game. He did that all night really and it bodes well moving forward.'
Football Association ambassador Paul Elliott has resigned from all of his roles representing the organisation following reports of a racism row. The anti-racism campaigner was part of the FA's judicial panel and a nominated member of UEFA committees. Ex-Glasgow Celtic and Moscow Chelski FC defender Elliott has also left his role at anti-discrimination body Kick It Out. FA chairman David Bernstein said: 'The use of discriminatory language is unacceptable, regardless of context.' He added: 'It has made Paul's position untenable. I wish to thank Paul for his dedicated and unstinting work, particularly in the area of anti-racism. I am saddened by this turn of events and it is with regret that we accept Paul's resignation.' A report in the Sun newspaper alleged that Elliott had 'a dispute' by text message over a business venture with former Charlton player Richard Rufus. Elliott was reported to have used a derogatory term to Rufus. A statement from Elliott read: 'Earlier this week, a former friend and business colleague, made public a text message I sent him, in which I used a term which is widely known as being derogatory to my own community. I regret using it; it is inappropriate and not part of my everyday vocabulary. As an advocate of high-standards of public behaviour, and integrity in public life, I know the use of this word sends out mixed messages and contradicts my position as a Kick It Out trustee. I will continue to be active in other projects in what I believe to be a true and just cause.' Earlier this month, Elliott became the first black footballer to collect a CBE at Buckingham Palace for his services to equality and diversity in football. Elliott, whose career was curtailed by injury in 1992, has been a trustee of Kick It Out since 1996.

England thumped New Zealand by five wickets in the third one-day cricket international in Auckland to seal a 2-1 series win. Steven Finn claimed three for twenty seven as the hosts were bundled out for one hundred and eighty five in 43.5 overs, despite Brendon McCullum's defiant eighty off sixty seven balls. Alastair Cook made forty six, Eoin Morgan a rapid thirty nine and Jonathan Trott thirty eight in England's largely untroubled chase. Victory, completed with 12.3 overs to spare, secured a first ODI series triumph over the Kiwis for nineteen years. Not since the 1994 Texaco Trophy had England beaten New Zealand in a limited-overs campaign, but those who witnessed this comprehensive win, or Wednesday's eight-wicket mauling in Napier, can have few complaints about the destiny of the trophy. It also served as a timely fillip for the tourists ahead of the three-Test series which starts on 6 March, while the New Zealand management cannot fail to have been concerned by the manner in which their side were comprehensively outplayed twice in four days. The result at Eden Park was rarely in doubt from the moment England, having won the toss, reduced the Black Caps to eleven for three. The loss of Cook and Trott in quick succession was the closest England came to suffering a wobble in their pursuit, with the dismissals of Morgan and Jos Buttler arriving too late to have any bearing on the outcome. Joe Root, as in the previous match, hit the winning runs. That England could afford those slip-ups owed much to their performance with the ball. Steven Finn's opening spell of two for six off six overs was nigh on faultless - albeit on a pitch which suited his pace and bounce - and included the wickets of BJ Watling and Hamish Rutherford courtesy of outside edges. In between, the equally impressive James Anderson accounted for Kane Williamson in similar fashion and left New Zealand and grateful for a partly restorative stand of fifty three for the fourth wicket between Grant Elliott and Ross Taylor. Both fell in the space of nine deliveries, Elliott run out for twenty four after being sent back by the culpable Taylor as he went in search of a second run to fine-leg, and Taylor caught behind for twenty eight cutting at Stuart Broad. James Franklin offered the tamest of return catches to Graeme Swann - the off-spinner's one hundredth one-day international wicket - before Nathan McCullum edged the returning Finn low to slip. Although Brendan McCullum dented Finn's figures with two fours and a six during an over that cost seventeen runs - the skipper was responsible for eleven of the eighteen boundaries New Zealand managed in their innings - he received minimal resistance from the lower order. Andrew Ellis top-edged Stuart Broad to fine-leg and Chris Woakes pinned Kyle Mills in front in the next over. McCullum took sixes off both before he followed two meaty sixes off Swann by holing out at deep midwicket. The departure of Ian Bell for twenty four, caught at fine-leg attempting to pulling Ellis, barely checked England's fluent early progress as Cook and Trott added a serene sixty nine for the second wicket. Tim Southee, finding sufficient movement to locate the outside edge, removed both in successive overs, but Morgan gave the impression of a man eager to return home with a muscular thirty nine off twenty four balls. He swung Ellis to fine-leg moments before Buttler was caught behind on the pull, a dismissal that did no more than give the admirable Southee figures of three for forty eight.

England's dreams of a first rugby Grand Slam in a decade live on after they survived a bruising, breathless battle at a freezing Twickenham. A brilliant breakaway try from Wesley Fofana and the boot of Morgan Parra had given France a 10-9 half-time advantage as England struggled for possession and fluency. But a fourth successful penalty from Owen Farrell stole back the lead before an opportunistic try from the indomitable Manu Tuilagi and two late penalties from replacement Toby Flood snuffed out the tiring visitors. England's replacements made a huge impact in the nervous final quarter, the team once again showing a maturity beyond their experience to stay strong as their opponents crumbled. France have now lost their last five matches in this competition for the first time since 1958, a much-improved first half display undermined by indiscipline. England's victory means that they have now won six of the last seven Six Nations clashes against their great cross-Channel rivals. And with a struggling Italy next up at Twickenham in a fortnight's time, there is every chance they will travel to Cardiff on 15 March knowing a win would give them the championship, the triple crown and the Grand Slam. Farrell had given England the lead with barely a minute gone before Parra levelled it with his own first penalty. Initially, the contest struggled for momentum, the scrum messy and both sides guilty of handling errors as the big tackles came in. On a rare foray deep into the French twenty two, Farrell's inside pass found Tuilagi thundering and stepping, and only a last-gasp tackle from Parra prevented the try. The French forwards had already transgressed, Farrell making it 6-3 on twenty seven minutes, but a devastating run from the gifted Fofana seized the initiative back for the under-fire visitors. There looked to be little danger when the centre took Francois Trinh-Duc's flat pass but he accelerated through poor tackles from Courtney Lawes and Chris Ashton to burst clear down the left wing, hand off Ben Youngs and race under the posts. It was no less than France deserved, their loose forwards impressive and their set-piece more solid than England's. Farrell's third successful penalty narrowed the deficit to a single point at half-time, but it was England who had work to do - their tackling was too often sub-par, their decision-making sometimes questionable. They were shoved off their own scrum as the second half began, only for the left-footed Parra to pull his penalty to the right of the posts. When they did have possession, Ashton was turned over as he looked to escape down the right, and then a line-out ten metres from the French try-line was stolen by Christophe Samson. Farrell's boot was the constant. He made it 12-10 when Parra was penalised, and coach Stuart Lancaster looked to capitalise by bringing on James Haskell, Tom Youngs and Mako Vunipola for Lawes, Dylan Hartley and Joe Marler. The scrum immediately tightened, and when a penalty was sent skywards by Farrell the ball was spilled under pressure. It appeared to come off Vunipola in an offside position, but Tuilagi was the first to react, scooping up the loose ball and rumbling away into the open spaces behind the French line to make it 17-10 with twenty five minutes left. The capacity crowd celebrated what they hoped might be the pivotal play, only for Farrell to miss a difficult conversion and Joe Launchbury to then wander offside to allow replacement fly-half Frederic Michalak to cut the lead to just four points. It was sloppy from England, and Farrell then scuffed a long-range penalty - albeit though he was clearly injured - and was replaced by Toby Flood a moment later. England's replacements were making their presence felt, Danny Care on for Youngs and speeding up the delivery, France throwing the ball around with increasing abandon. Twice kick-throughs from Flood almost put his wingers in, the forwards punching holes, Tuilagi dominating the much-anticipated clash with his huge opposite number Mathieu Bastareaud. The pressure began to tell. Another infringement at the breakdown allowed Flood to stretch the lead to 20-13 with eight minutes left, and when Florian Fritz failed to roll away at the breakdown Flood added three more. There was no way back for Les Bleus, and Twickenham could celebrate another fine win for this impressive young squad.

An ITV report into the death of the late Richard Briers claimed that after his sitcom career, the actor went on to Shakespearean roles including 'Much Ado About Nothing and Henry Vee.' Bless 'em.
The FBI has 'disciplined' agents for sending nude pictures, bugging a boss's office, and visiting a massage parlour, a leaked memo has revealed. The misconduct cases were among those detailed in a leaked internal e-mail, sent to all FBI staff and published online by CNN. They ranged from the 'unprofessional conduct' of texting nude images, to more serious theft and gun offences. The unnamed agents involved were either suspended on dismissed. In one case, an employee used a personal mobile phone to send nude photographs to several other employees. The report said the incident 'created office gossip' and 'adversely affected the daily activities of several squads.' In another incident, a staff member used an FBI-issued Blackberry to send explicit text messages to a second staff member, while another was disciplined for e-mailing nude pictures of herself to her ex-boyfriend's wife. Another agent was suspended for fourteen days for paying for a 'sexual favour' while visiting a massage parlour. Other violations included committing fraud, mishandling evidence, shop-lifting and making unauthorised use of the FBI database to search for information on friends and family. One agent was suspended for taking an FBI motorcycle 'for a joyride', while another was disciplined for 'carrying his gun while drunk.' In one stand-out case, an employee was sacked for unprofessional conduct after he was found to have bugged his boss's office. The report said the employee hid a recording device in the office and searched through his supervisor's paperwork. The FBI said the regular e-mails to staff on disciplinary issues were designed as deterrence. 'We're hoping (that) getting the message out in the quarterlies is going to teach people, as well as their supervisors you can't do this stuff,' FBI assistant director Candice Will said, in an interview with CNN. 'When you are given an FBI Blackberry, it's for official use. It's not to text the woman in another office who you found attractive or to send a picture of yourself in a state of undress. That is not why we provide you an FBI Blackberry.'

A pub owner in Ireland has been fined for holding a lock-in with dozens of nuns. Christy Walsh, who runs a bar in Listowel, County Kerry, has been fined a total of seven hundred euros due to the illegal drinking. However, the wimple wearers were not, actually, real nuns - they were volunteers who dressed up as nuns as part of a Guinness World Record attempt entitled 'Nunday'. A total of one thousand four hundred and thirty six adults dressed up and gathered at the GAA sports ground in the town for the event. Police later visited the bar at 1.45am, forty five minutes after closing time, and found thirty people dressed as nuns still drinking. During a second visit at about 4.10am, there were still apparently twenty one of them at the bar. Walsh said that he accepted that police officers who turned up at his pub were just 'doing their job,' but added that he was 'saddened' by the decision to proceed with the prosecution.

For today's Keith Telly Topping's 33 of the Day, dear blog reader, here are The News.

Friday, February 22, 2013

The Future's Here Today

Doctor Who's showrunner The Lord Thy God Steven Moffat has admitted that he was initially unsure about bringing back The Ice Warriors. The classic Doctor Who Martian monsters will return - for the first time in almost forty years - in a 2013 episode written by Mark Gatiss. But Moffat revealed in an interview over the weekend that he had long considered the Martian race to be 'rubbish' villains. 'It was Mark Gatiss's idea - it was very much his pitch,' the popular long-running family SF drama's head writer said in an interview conducted at the Gallifrey 2013 convention in Los Angeles. 'He'd been pitching for Ice Warriors for a while [and] I wasn't tremendously persuaded, I'll be honest. I thought they were maybe the default condition for what people thought of as rubbish Doctor Who monsters - they moved very, very slowly and spoke in a way that meant you couldn't hear a word they said.' Moffat explained that he was eventually turned around when Gatiss pitched a number of 'stormingly good ideas' for the creatures' comeback. 'It's an absolute cracker of an episode,' he said of the piece, which is currently scheduled under the working title The Cold War. Moffat also claimed that he is 'very busy' planning for the show's fiftieth anniversary later in the year. The writer insisted that fans will get more than just the rumoured hour-long special in November. '[There's] a lot of different things going on,' Moffat said. 'Don't believe the nonsense about one sixty-minute film, that is complete nonsense.' Moffat added that he is 'excited' to shoot Doctor Who in 3D for the first time for the anniversary special, but did admit that utilising the technology presents some problems. 'I think it poses every kind of logistical problem,' he said. 'You can imagine it takes much longer to shoot, every CGI shot has to be done twice, it's a proper old headache. But wouldn't it be awful if some other show was the first one to be 3D - it's got to be Doctor Who, hasn't it?'

Russell Davies has turned down repeated offers to return to Doctor Who, Steven Moffat also claimed. The family SF drama's current showrunner revealed, in the Gallifrey 2013 interview, that his predecessor wants 'a nice long rest' from the series. 'I do keep asking him [to write a new episode],' Moffat insisted. 'The offer is continually made and I'm getting nowhere!' Moffat added that he would have Davies - who served as Doctor Who's head-writer and showrunner between 2005 and 2010 - back on the show 'like a shot', calling the Russell 'the best writer breathing. I think he probably did his duty for Doctor Who so he's maybe wanting a nice long rest from it,' Moffat acknowledged. Davies himself had previously ruled out the possibility of returning to Doctor Who for the show's fiftieth anniversary. 'I have asked Steven Moffat not to tell me what they are planning,' he said, adding that he wants to 'enjoy the celebrations as a fan.'

A new voice encounters the old as Nicholas Briggs confirmed this week that he had taken on the mantle of one of the original voices of The Daleks in the forthcoming Doctor Who biopic An Adventure In Space And Time. Making the announcement on Twitter, the man who has voiced The Daleks since their return to TV in 2005 commented: 'Just did my Peter Hawkins cameo today. Beyond exciting.' He later added: 'You can never tell what will make the edit. But I had a costume and a wig and everything.' Speaking to Doctor Who Magazine back in 2006, Nick paid fulsome tribute to legendary TV voice artists Hawkins: 'All of us who've provided Dalek voices over the last forty years owe him a massive debt. None of us have been as good as Peter, but he supplied our inspiration. He was truly the Emperor of the Daleks.'

Yer actual Jack Davenport is to be the lead in ITV's new 1960s medical drama Breathless. The actor will play a brilliant but charismatic surgeon, Otto Powell, in the new series. Breathless - which has been compared to BBC1's Call The Midwife due to its period setting - has been devised by Casualty creator Paul Unwin. The drama follows the lives of doctors and nurses working in a London hospital, a workplace that hides 'a cauldron of lies, deceptions and guilty secrets, driven by love, ambition and sex.' Opening in 1961, Breathless will be written by Unwin, co-creator Peter Grimsdale and Simon Tyrell. 'I'm delighted to be adding a new medical drama to our roster of returning series,' said ITV's Acting Director of Drama Commissioning Steve November. 'Paul and Peter have created a compelling group of characters at a fascinating point in the history of the NHS.' ITV Studios executive Kate Bartlett added: 'Breathless is an exhilarating and charismatic character drama, set against a glamorous London backdrop. The medical stories and events are there to illuminate and complicate the lives of our key characters and 1961 is a fascinating time in which to explore the changing role of women in society.' Breathless will go into production in April and will be filmed on location in London.

Mary Berry has reportedly signed up for her own show on the BBC. The Great British Bake Off judge is said to be fronting a 'currently untitled project' about teaching viewers to make family dinners, reports the Sun. An alleged 'source' allegedly said: 'Many families don't eat around the same table any more – so the idea of this show is to encourage that by showing people how to make decent home-cooked family meals. As it's Mary there will be plenty of baking tips, too.' Her Bake Off co-star Paul Hollywood has already signed up for his own spin-off show Bread, which will focus - fairly obviously, given the title - on his love for bread-making. Well, it's not going to be about lobster thermidor, is it?
Proposals to punish naughty newspapers with huge fines for breaches of privacy and for libel if they do not join the new press regulator are - allegedly - 'unlawful' three lawyers have claimed. The three leading QCs - Lord Pannick, Desmond Browne and Antony White - have said that separate proposals from the Conservative party and Lord Justice Leveson to use the threat of big fines to encourage newspapers to join a new self-regulatory body are 'inconsistent with authority', incompatible with article ten of the European Convention on Human Rights and 'objectionable in principle.' In a ten-page analysis, commissioned (of course) by the newspaper industry, they said the proposals 'single out for punishment a particular category of defendant', the press, 'rather than a particular kind of conduct' that is objectionable. 'To punish the press for what others may do without punishment is inconsistent with the special importance that both domestic and Strasbourg jurisprudence attaches to freedom of the press,' they add. And this, let's remember, was commissioned by the press industry. So, no quite obvious - and sick - agenda going down there, then. The comments were then, gleefully, reported by the Gruniad Morning Star. The Leveson Report recommends that 'exemplary damages (whether so described or renamed as punitive damages) should be available for actions for breach of privacy, breach of confidence and similar media torts, as well as for libel and slander.' Personally, yer actual Keith Telly Topping recommends lining them all up against a wall and horsewhipping them till they scream and they bubble and they beg - beg - for mercy. But, like the Leveson recommendations, that one hasn't been picked up by the government. Pity, really. Pannick, Browne and White, however, claim that the Leveson recommendations are based on an 'out of date' Law Commission report which was written in 1997, before the Human Rights Act of 1998, which enshrines the individual's right to freedom of expression in law. That however, is surely freedom of expression 'so long as it isn't breaking another law at the same time.' One could argue that a burglar is, by his robbing ways, merely demonstrating his freedom of expression to nick stuff. That won't save him from a spell in pokey if he gets pinched by the bobbies, however. The lawyers said that the 'incompatibility' between provisions for exemplary damages and the Human Rights Act is 'so striking that no minister of the crown' would be able to get it on to the statute books. Pannick, Browne and White are - according to the Gruniad - considered expert media lawyers. The legal opinion of the three lawyers comes weeks after Lord Lester made similarly trenchant criticism of Leveson's recommendations on exemplary damages. Awarding exemplary damages for breaches of privacy by the press would be 'wrong in principle' and could lead to 'the overnight closure' of local newspapers and magazines such as Private Eye, he warned in a House of Lords debate last month about the Leveson report on the future of press regulation. The Liberal Democrat peer criticised Leveson for ignoring 'repeated rejections' of proposals for exemplary damages by successive Labour governments and by Mr Justice Eady, a high court judge. Eady awarded sixty thousand smackers in a landmark privacy case brought by former Formula 1 boss Max Mosley against the Scum of the World, but stopped short of exemplary damages. Pannick, Browne and White also use Eady's Mosley judgment to outline the existing legal authority on the matter. In rejecting exemplary damages, Eady said: 'They bring the notion of punishment into civil litigation when damages are usually supposed to be about compensation.' He also said that exemplary damages could 'not be justified' under article ten of the convention. 'I was not satisfied that English law requires, in addition to the availability of compensatory damages and injunctive relief, that the media should also be exposed to the somewhat unpredictable risk of being "fined" on a quasi-criminal basis. There is no "pressing social need" for this. The "chilling effect" would be obvious,' Eady said in his judgment. Pannick, Browne and White also said that the exemplary damage provisions could impact on bloggers, non-government organisations and anyone uploading content – photos or reports – that might be libellous or a breach of privacy outside the UK's jurisdiction if it were simply available to download in this country. Their opinion, which was delivered to newspapers last month, comes as the government prepares to block amendments to the defamation bill which would put newspapers at risk of having to pay exemplary damages if they failed to give subjects of a story prior notification that they intended to publish. Mosley had argued during his evidence to the Leveson inquiry last year that this should be compulsory for newspapers because it is so difficult to undo the damage of a story which contains libel or breaches of privacy after it has been published. He was not notified by the Scum of the World that it was going to run the story which prompted his successful privacy action and said he had 'spent millions' trying to get copies of the story removed from the Internet outside the UK.
Lord McAlpine is reported to be ending his legal pursuit of hundreds of Twitter users over false allegations linking him to child sex abuse in return for donations to Children In Need. In a statement issued on Thursday, the former Conservative party chairman said that he was 'drawing a line' under potential legal actions against Twitter users with fewer than five hundred followers – but vowed to focus on claiming libel damages from Sally Bercow, the wife of the Commons speaker, over her allegedly defamatory tweets. 'Whilst I reached a settlement last year with both the BBC and ITV, I would like to now draw this unfortunate episode, forced into my life, to a close,' said McAlpine. 'I have dropped all claims against those tweeters with less than five hundred followers, in return for a very modest donation to BBC Children In Need, which funds two thousand six hundred projects supporting disadvantaged children and young people in the UK. I have requested that my lawyers, RMPI LLP, focus on the action against Sally Bercow and that damages arising from this are donated to a charity of her choice. I am not intending to make any further comment on this matter.' McAlpine has described how he was 'consigned to the lowest circle of hell' by the mass Twitter libel, which was sparked by the BBC's Newsnight report on 2 November 2012. Although the BBC2 programme did not name McAlpine (or, indeed, anyone else), it prompted a guessing game on social networks which led to the peer being falsely accused of being a paedophile. At the height of the Twitter frenzy, Bercow tweeted to her fifty six thousand followers: 'Why is Lord McAlpine trending? *innocent face*' and later added: 'Final on McAlpine: am VERY sorry for inadvertently fanning flames. But I tweet as me, forgetting that to some of u [sic] I am Mrs bloody Speaker.' On 15 November, after McAlpine threatened to sue Twitter users who had named him, Bercow wrote: 'I guess I'd better get some legal advice then. Still maintain was not a libellous tweet — just foolish.' McAlpine is seeking fifty thousand smackers in damages from naughty Mrs Bercow in a dispute which is likely to become one of the first high court libel trials over a Twitter post. His lawyers are in the process of contacting about five hundred Twitter users over messages they posted about the peer. A spokeswoman for McAlpine declined to reveal how many had made the twenty five quid donation to Children in Need. His solicitor, Andrew Reid, told the Gruniad Morning Star in December that 'close to one thousand people' had written to apologise over their online comments after lawyers identified 'ten thousand potentially defamatory tweets.' Some high-profile tweeters, including the Gruniad columnist George Monbiot and the comedian Alan Davies, swiftly apologised to McAlpine after he vowed to take action. However, Bercow has consistently denied that her tweets were libellous and has hired the London law firm Carter-Ruck to defend her against the claim.

Jeremy Paxman told a BBC inquiry into Newsnight's axed Jimmy Savile investigation that it was 'common gossip' around the BBC that the DJ liked 'young' people. The presenter said it was assumed they were girls, but that he did not know 'whether it was girls or boys.' The presenter's testimony is among thousands of pages of transcripts from an inquiry into why Newsnight dropped its probe into abuse by Savile. The Pollard Report, in December, called Newsnight's decision 'flawed.' During his interview with Pollard, Paxman said: 'It was, I would say, common gossip that Jimmy Savile liked, you know, young - it was always assumed to be girls. I don't know whether it was girls or boys. But I had no evidence of it, and I never saw anything that made me take it more seriously than it was common gossip.' But, describing why he felt the shelving of the Newsnight investigation had been wrong, he said: 'These people prey upon children in vulnerable situations and when the children complain they are not believed. I thought that we had behaved just like many other authorities and I didn't like it.' The BBC has published online about three thousand pages of e-mails, interviews and submissions from BBC executives and journalists - although about three per cent of details have been removed. The transcripts include details of comments left on a BBC online tribute page to Savile that were removed by moderators. A transcript of the interview between Pollard and ex-BBC director general George Entwistle includes reference to comments saying: 'One of my best friends in 1972 was molested by this creep Savile. He was never the same again. Killed himself in 1985. How's About That Then?' Helen Boaden, then-director of BBC News, says in the documents that she 'had never heard any dark rumours about Jimmy Savile.' Acting director general Tim Davie said that by releasing the transcripts, the BBC was being 'open and transparent in its handling of this unhappy chapter in our history.' But he said some details had been redacted for reasons of defamation, data privacy, protection of confidential sources, anonymity for victims of sexual assault, potential prejudice to or interference with police investigations or ongoing criminal proceedings, legal professional privilege and confidentiality. He added: 'It has not been an entirely comfortable process for us to go through but it is right that we did it this way. It is important that the BBC now moves forward with the lessons learned and continues to regain the public's trust.' Ahead of publication, newspapers reported that both Jeremy Paxman and Lord McAlpine were upset that the full evidence was not to be revealed. But another paper said the BBC would be 'engulfed' in a mountain of 'deeply unedifying' material. The BBC appears to be in a no-win position. If some of the evidence does prove explosive, it will grab the headlines. If it doesn't, the 'censorship' allegations will become the story. Lord Patten always said some material would be redacted for legal reasons. The BBC says these include protecting the confidentiality of sources or victims of Jimmy Savile, and avoiding the risk of libel actions. BBC Trust chairman Lord Patten said: 'These documents paint a very unhappy picture, but the BBC needs to be open - more open than others would be - in confronting the facts that lie behind Nick Pollard's report. "A limited amount of text has been blacked out for legal reasons, but no-one could say that the effect has been to sanitise this material, which again puts a spotlight on some of our failings. We need to acknowledge these shortcomings and learn from them.' The review was set up by the BBC to decide if there were management failings over the six-week Savile investigation, which was dropped by the BBC's flagship current affairs programme in December 2011. The report, headed by former head of Sky News Nick Pollard and published in December, concluded the decision to shelve the investigation was 'seriously flawed' but 'done in good faith.' It dismissed allegations that it was dropped to protect tribute shows to the DJ, who died aged eighty four in October 2011, and who police believe was a dirty old rotter who abused hundreds of children and young people over five decades. However, it was highly critical of BBC bosses, describing 'chaos and confusion' and 'leadership in short supply' - though found no evidence of a cover-up. The BBC accepted the findings in full and the corporation announced a series of staff changes after it was published. Another review led by Dame Janet Smith, looking at the culture and practices of the BBC during the years in which Savile worked there, is expected next year.

Rick Edwards will present a one-off BBC3 documentary about Oscar Pistorius fatally shooting his girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp. The sixty-minute special has been commissioned by the BBC's Fiona Campbell and Mentorn Media executive producer Steve Anderson. Controller of BBC3 Zai Bennett: 'BBC3 is never afraid to tackle current affairs and we are committed to showing bold, thought-provoking programmes for sixteen to thirty fours. Mentorn will be producing this programme at incredible speed, and together with presenter Rick Edwards, I'm sure they will deliver a documentary that will bring a new angle to this ever developing news story.' Anderson added: 'The story of Oscar Pistorius and Reeva Steenkamp has captured everyone's attention. It is hugely important and Mentorn has the expertise to deliver it quickly to BBC3.' Mentorn is the company behind previous 'fast-turnaround special' Superstorm Sandy: Caught On Camera. It also made the Dispatches: Murder On Honeymoon programme on the case of Anni Dewani in South Africa. The film will be produced and directed by Nick London, and the associate producer is Shekhar Bhatia.

Former deputy prime minister Lord Michael Heseltine was left embarrassed during filming for this week's edition of Question Time when his mobile phone started ringing during the middle of a debate about the economy. Host David Dimbleby commented: 'There's a telephone going off!' However, he quickly realised that it was yer man Hezzae's and not someone in the audience. The Conservative politician joked afterwards: 'My wife is supporting what I have been saying, she is just letting me know.' His fellow guests joked that it might be Chancellor George Osbourne calling to warn him about 'going off message.' Question Time was broadcast on Thursday from St Paul's Cathedral for the first time in the programme's history.

Bay TV Liverpool has been awarded the licence to provide a local TV service in Liverpool, and will now serve around eight hundred and ninety thousand homes in the city on Freeview. Media regulator Ofcom awarded Bay TV the Liverpool licence over rival bids, including Phil Redmond's Our-TV, Irish company Made TV, and Birmingham's YourTV. The Bay TV Liverpool channel will now be able to broadcast using dedicated spectrum on digital terrestrial television, reaching its audience on Freeview channel eight. Bay TV started broadcasting local programming over the Internet in 2011. It is chaired by former Liverpool Chamber of Commerce chief executive Jack Stopforth, and backed by former Liverpool FC star Robbie Fowler and radio personality Pete Price. The new television channel will serve homes in Liverpool, along with Halton, Wigan and parts of Cheshire, with locally made programmes covering news, politics, current affairs, music, entertainment and features. Bay TV Liverpool's schedule will include more than ten hours of local programmes, including tow and half hours of news each day. A weekly politics and local issues debate programme, filmed on location and rotating around the local boroughs, will be hosted by veteran BBC broadcaster Liam Fogarty. The channel will also have viewer participation and involvement across politics, sport, arts, education, religion and current affairs. Alongside launching on Freeview, Bay TV Liverpool will broadcast on Sky and Virgin Media. Bay TV chairman Stopforth said that he was 'thrilled' to have won the licence, but added that the hard work is 'just beginning. Our vision for local TV is to capitalise on Liverpool's resurgent business and arts scene and make it accessible to our local audience,' he said in a statement. 'This city has always been a fantastic source of news and Scousers have a huge appetite for supporting and promoting their city. We have to channel that and capitalise on it.' He then added: 'Dey do, doh, don't dey doh?' Bay TV Liverpool chief executive Chris Johnson added: 'Bay TV Liverpool has been broadcasting over the Internet since November 2011 and has already shown the great potential and appetite for local TV in the city. With the new licence we will soon be on Channel Eight on Freeview and we are one hundred per cent committed to providing a station the people of Liverpool and surrounding areas can really call their own.' He then added: 'Hey, come 'ead, is somebody pinchin' my car, la?' Ofcom - who told the pair of them to 'calm down' (advice which it repeated on several occasions) - has now allocated eighteen of the nineteen initial local TV licences, including the owners of the Evening Standard winning London, STV being awarded Edinburgh and Glasgow, Made in Tyne & Wear being handed the Newcastle licence, YourTV getting Manchester and Made in Television winning the Leeds franchise. The bid for Preston in still undecided whilst no bids were received for franchises in Plymouth and Swansea.

Ask Rhod Gilbert has been cancelled by the BBC. Gilbert revealed the news in a podcast interview, in which he also suggested that he may quit stand-up to become a primary school teacher.

Big Shola Ameobi his very self struck from the penalty spot to send yer actual Keith Telly Topping's beloved (though still unsellable) Magpies into the last sixteen of the Europa League with the only goal of their tie against Metalist Kharkiv. There, The Toon will join Stottingtot Hotshots and Moscow Chelski FC, but not Liverpool Alabamaa Yee-Haws who went out of the competition on the away goals rule to Zenit St Petersburg. Papiss Demba Cissé missed two good chances to give the Magpies a first-half lead before Moussa Sissoko won the penalty when he was fouled by keeper Olexandr Goryainov after pouncing on a dreadful backpass from Metalist defender Papa Gueye. Tim Krul made great saves from Willian and Jonathan Cristaldo as the Ukrainian side failed to gain an equaliser. Newcastle were unfortunate to go into the second leg merely all-square after a goalless draw at St James' Park. Cissé twice had the ball in the net on Tyneside, only to be harshly denied by the assistant's flag (certainly the first of the two goals was, clearly, onside). He also missed two other good chances to earn an advantage. And the Senegal striker was wasteful again in the first half in Kharkiv when he blew two golden opportunities to pinch a potentially crucial away goal. His first effort after just twelve minutes ended with a weak shot straight at Metalist's first-leg hero Goryainov. And Cissé should have done better with his second chance two minutes before the break. He created the opportunity himself with a strong run before exchanging passes with Ameobi and hitting a strike that was parried away by the Metalist keeper. But Newcastle were finally ahead in the sixty third minute when Sissoko quickly pounced on Gueye's errant backpass and was caught by keeper Goryainov, whose sliding challenge came marginally too late. Ameobi confidently sent the keeper the wrong way from the spot for his fourth goal of the season and his third in the Europa League. Newcastle, who were missing tough-tackling midfielder Cheick Tioté through illness, and defender Steven Taylor - who was rested to the bench - had looked comfortable in a bitty, ill-tempered match. But the goal seemed to free the home side as they finally stretched Alan Pardew's team in the final twenty minutes. Krul was quickly off his line to deny Willian when the Metalist substitute tried to lift the ball over him. And the Dutch keeper made two excellent saves to deny Cristaldo in the space of twenty seconds before being caught with a late challenge from the Argentine forward a few minutes later. Newcastle defender James Perch then made a desperate block as Jaja tried to prod in an equaliser from six yards. But the Magpies, whose twenty-year-old defender Massadio Haidara made an impressive full début at left back in place of Davide Santon, held firm to set up a last-sixteen clash with Russian side FC Anzhi Makhachkala and a long trip to the Caucasuses.

Yer actual Keith Telly Topping has had something of a really shitty week dear blog reader. Happens to us all, I know, I'm not fishing for sympathy here. Various different reasons, as it goes, most of them rather trivial (although one, considerably not) have conspired together to muddy to waters of my metaphorical stream and, by the middle of Thursday afternoon, yer actual Keith Telly Topping his very self was feeling vastly cheesed off with life in general. Thank goodness, therefore, that Thursday night is Uncle Scunthorpe's Record Player night at the Tyneside. This week, for at least a couple of hours, yer actual Keith Telly Topping was able to forget his problems in the company of some good friends and listen to one of the greatest - and certainly one of the most influential - records ever made by anyone, yer actual Kraftwerk's Trans Europe Express. So, before we get on to today's Keith Telly Topping's 33 of the Day (and have a quick guess what that is, dear blog reader), yer actual Keith Telly Topping his very self would like to thank his friends: Uncle Scunthorpe, Christian and Vicky, Jeff, Ewan and Vicky, Billy and Steph, Chris and Gillian, Mietek and Naomi, Bruce and anyone else I've forgotten who made it such a pleasurable experience.
(There's yer actual Keith Telly Topping, incidentally, right at the back with, as usual, a big white arrow sticking out of the top of his head.) And, obviously, he'd also like to thank The Fab Four their very selves - Ralf, Florian, Karl and Wolfgang - for, you know, inventing modern popular music. This, therefore, is yer actual Keith Telly Topping's 33 of the Day.
Of course, yer actual Keith Telly Topping did consider giving that a miss and going to see Girls Aloud at the Arena. That, as they say, is an opportunity missed.