Health, dear blog reader. It can be a jolly amusing thing at times. 'My heart was really pounding and I felt a funny tingling all over,' Woody Allen said in one of his earlier, funnier movies. 'I was either in love or I had smallpox.' (He also said 'I walk through the valley of the shadow of death. Actually, make that "I run through the valley of the shadow of death' - in order to get out of the valley of the shadow of death more quickly' so, you know, he clearly knew what he was talking about.)
This blogger's health continues to be a matter which baffles medical science the mostest, baby. He's got a bad back, a dodgy knee and ankle, a nasty case of RSI on his mouse-hand, several extremely unwelcome problems with his naughty bits (which you really don't want to hear any further details about, trust this blogger) and, to top it all, he believes he's got a cold coming on. And yet, last week, this blogger attended his bi-annual Type Two Diabetes check-up thingy with the lovely Nurse Janice and, once again, it was mostly good news. This blogger's weight has shot up since the last check-up six months ago, which was disappointing as he'd worked so hard to get it down last time. Then again, judging from media reports, he's hardly alone in that regard and his medical professionals didn't seem at all worried about it.
Elsewhere, however, it was all largely positive. Blood glucose level was slightly down (forty six last time, forty five this), bloody pressure was, similarly, in the borderline low-risk range. As was this blogger's cholesterol level (slightly up on the last check up but nothing at all concerning). Kidney, eye and feet tests were also fine. Yer actual Keith Telly Topping will be having a telephone chat with Doctor Chris next week but, the general consensus seems to be, once again, 'whatever it is you're doing, keep doing it.'
Meanwhile, on a marginally-related note, this blogger managed to break one of his teeth a couple of weeks ago - not even biting on anything particularly hard, either. Only Keith Telly Topping can manage such malarkey, dear blog reader. Here was what was left of the filling after said soft-biting incident.
Nasty, eh? Anyway, he rang his dentist, explained that he was not in any pain and, therefore, he realised that he was not an emergency case but he thought he'd better let them know about the situation. This blogger was pleasantly surprised by the response - they are running a limited service at the moment but, obviously, they're prioritising certain cases over others so the receptionist told me that a dentist would ring me back in a few days and arrange a convenient time for me to pop in and get it sorted. God bless the National Health Service (dental division). Indeed, that happened and, last Friday, this blogger rocked-up for his appointment with the drill. The broken molar was capped and well-filled and the Novocaine eventually wore off (coming down was not, especially, unpleasant, let it be noted). The appointment was supposed to be at 3pm but they rang the Stately Telly Topping Manor Plague House that morning and asked if this blogger could come in a bit earlier? '2.30,' the reception asked. 'Not particularly, but it's a bit awkward trying to eat everything on the other side of my mouth' this blogger replied. True story.
As noted in the last bloggerisationisms update, this blogger is currently busy compiling the From The North 'best and worst TV of the year' awards. And, it's going quite well thus far even if this blogger does say so himself. There will be, approximately seventy or thereabouts TV shows featuring in the various award lists and Keith Telly Topping has already managed to research and write up the entries for about a third of them. Usually, this highlight of the From The North calendar is written in one long coffee-fuelled writing session around late November and takes this blogger about a week to ten days of non-stop work to pull together. But this year, having had to previously amend his modus operendi in 2019 due to work commitments, this blogger has again taken to writing it in smaller, more manageable chunks over the course of a couple of months. It's rather therapeutic as it happens, albeit, this blogger is mainly doing the 'best of' entries at the moment; by the time he gets down to the twenty five or so programmes that he really didn't like, one imagines his state of temporal grace will have worn somewhat thin. As with previous years, Keith Telly Topping Presents ... The From The North TV Awards (2020) will be published for all the world to see on this blog in a few weeks time. Book your seats early, dear blog reader, it's going to be large.
This blogger was jolly startled to wake up on Tuesday morning and be confronted by the following staggering sight from the Stately Telly Topping Manor Plague House front room window. It was looking like there might be a wee bit of rain later in the day. Either that of The Apocalypse was a-cometh. Which, hey, given the current state of the planet might not, necessarily, be an entirely bad thing.
Yer actual Keith Telly Topping, however, decided it was (just) more likely to be the former and so grabbed an umbrella for his forthcoming trip down the shops. All the sensible kiddies do it, they reckon.
Earlier this week, this blogger received an e-mail from someone asking if Keith Telly Topping's IMDB page is, indeed, his. Odd question, you may think. This blogger told the enquiree that no, it actually belongs to that professor from Dundee University who also shares Keith Telly Topping's Amazon page. As for whomsoever the chap is that's featured on Wikipedia your guess, dear blog reader, is every bit as good as this blogger's.
Meanwhile, dear blog reader, it's Friday night at the Stately Telly Topping Manor Plague House; a nice, tasty chicken and king prawn curry and an episode of Qi. What more, in all honesty, could any person wish for? (All right, a Big Dirty Woman would be the deal-breaker, admittedly ...)
An important observation: By Hell, but TV continuity announcers get their money for nowt, do they not? 'And now on Dave, tonight's movie The Da Vinci Code, based on the international best seller. Of the same name.' Well, it's not going to have been based on the international best seller Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang, is it?
And now, a public service announcement. With guitars. And, you know, pom-poms ...
Mad as toast. From that, dear blog reader, to the semi-regular From The North favourite 'a few items which caught (and, briefly, retained) this blogger's attention on the BBC News website.' Starting with 'Murder Hornet': First Nest Found In US Eradicated With Vacuum Hose. Cos, it's the only language these Murder Hornet understand, clearly.
Next, Lily Allen: 'Women Masturbating In A Relationship Isn't Wrong' in which Lil opines: 'If you're hungry, you don't wait until your partner gets home to have a slice of toast.' Can't argue with that. In fact, this blogger rather fancies a hot slice right now. Smothered with plenty of butter.
Then, there's Sunderland Bar Burglar Found Asleep Beside Cheesecake. Because, let's face it, whom amongst us could honesty resist such a yummy delight whilst mid-burgle?
Covid: Don't Let North Get 'Left Behind' Tory MPs Warn PM was also fascinating. If only because the Conservatives have always been such big supporters of The North, haven't they?
On a related-note, there's Some Blackburn Families 'Ignoring Guidelines'. Which may be true but it's hardly unique to Blackburn.
Frank Bough who died earlier this week was one of the highest-profile and highest-paid presenters on BBC Television. In a career spanning over three decades, he won a reputation for his relaxed and unflappable style on camera. He presented the BBC's flagship sports programme, Grandstand, and launched the corporation's Breakfast Time TV programme in 1983. But his career abruptly ended after lurid tabloid revelations.
Francis Joseph Bough was born in a two-up, two-down terrace house in the Fenton area of Stoke-on-Trent in January 1933. His father, who worked as an upholsterer, lost his job and the family moved to Oswestry in Shropshire, where Bough attended the local grammar school. He was a keen sportsman and also enjoyed acting, taking parts in a number of school Shakespeare productions. Although not particularly academic he won a scholarship to Merton College, Oxford, in the days when, as he later put it, 'Oxford valued a good all-rounder.' He was a talented footballer, winning a Blue, although his side were beaten by Cambridge in the Varsity match at Wembley. Bough did his National Service in the Royal Tank Regiment before getting a job as a graduate trainee with ICI in Billingham. He continued to play amateur football in the North East but became increasingly unhappy with his job, finally deciding he wanted to be a broadcaster. He pestered the BBC for two years and, in 1962, the corporation relented and gave him a three-month contract reporting on football matches in the Newcastle and Sunderland region. Other programmes followed on radio and television, mainly on sport, interviewing people like the golfer Peter Alliss, the runner Chris Brasher and the cricketer Cyril Washbrook, but also presenting the regional news programme Home At Six, later to become Look North. With his love of and knowledge of sport, he became the presenter of Sportsview in 1964, taking over from Peter Dimmock. The programme went out midweek and featured football as well as a number of pre-recorded items. He also presented and commentated on some of the early Match Of The Day's when regular commentators Ken Woolstenholme and David Coleman were otherwise occupied. He also began an eighteen-year stint hosting the BBC's Sports Review Of The Year, which later became Sports Personality Of The Year. Bough was part of the BBC's World Cup commentating team in 1966, notably covering one of the great upsets in the tournament's history when North Korea beat Italy at Ayresome Park. His stint on Sportsview ended in 1968 when David Coleman took the reins and the programme was renamed Sportsnight. However, it marked Bough's move to Grandstand, the BBC's flagship Saturday afternoon TV sports programme. In the days before sport sold its rights to the highest bidder, Grandstand covered a host of sports every week, including high-profile events such as the Olympic Games, FA Cup finals and the Grand National. These were mixed, depending on the season, with regular horse races, motor sport, athletics, cricket and rugby league.
It was on Grandstand, with its multitude of live feeds providing the potential for things to go wrong, that Bough's bomb-proof presenting style came into its own. Here he gained his reputation for remaining an oasis of calm no matter what technical hitches were occurring. His style prompted Michael Parkinson's remark that 'if my life depended on the smooth handling of a TV show he'd be the one I'd want in charge.' Bough, when once asked the secret of this ability to keep his head when all about him were losing theirs, said simply: 'I have a very long fuse.' He was a perfectionist, however. He said: 'We're not in the business of just getting by on this programme.' In 1972 he began presenting Nationwide, the BBC's magazine programme that went out after the early evening news. It was usually a fairly light-hearted programme, with opt-outs for BBC regions to focus on local news. However, he recalled some resistance from managers in BBC current affairs who were aghast that a man from the Sports Department was to present one of their programmes. In the same year, Bough had the harrowing experience of anchoring the BBC coverage of the Munich Olympics during which eleven members of the Israeli team were murdered by members of the Palestinian Black September terrorists. 'It was a bizarre situation,' he later said. 'The athletics continued while people were getting killed.' As one of television's best-known faces he appeared on the 1977 Morecambe & Wise Christmas Show. Together with a number of other presenters (like Parkinson and Michael Aspel) and newsreaders, including the rugby league commentator Eddie Waring, he donned a sailor suit to perform the legendary 'There Is Nothing Like A Dame' routine with Eric and Ernie.
By now Bough was beginning to tire of Grandstand. He still loved fronting the big sporting events but, as he later remarked: 'I began to feel I was play-acting when it was Widnes versus Batley on a wet November afternoon.' Hearing that the BBC was about to launch a new breakfast TV service in 1983, Bough approached the editor Ron Neil. Few presenters at the time had experience of presenting long and largely unscripted programmes and his stint at Grandstand got him the job. He proved a natural when the BBC launched Breakfast Time in January 1983, his laidback and comfortable style becoming an immediate hit with his early morning audience. His fellow presenter, Nick Ross, later recalled that Bough brought a much needed 'sense of serenity and composure' to the programme. In 1987, fed up with early mornings, Bough quit Breakfast Time to present the Holiday programme. It was to be a short stint. In 1988 he was sacked by the BBC after a newspaper carried lurid revelations that he had indulged in cocaine parties with prostitutes. The story came as a particular shock, given Bough's hitherto clean-cut family-man image. After being sacked by the BBC, Bough went into therapy to address his drug habit and picked up work with the London commercial radio station LBC, with LWT, presenting its Six O'Clock Live show and with Sky TV and there was a return to sports broadcasting for ITV's initial rugby World Cup coverage, but his renaissance was short-lived. In 1992 he was photographed leaving a sadomasochistic prostitute's flat that, according to newspaper reports, featured a cage and school canes. Bough felt he was being got at, complaining to the Evening Standard: 'It is a horrendous experience. You are followed day and night. One paper fully admits that they have dogged my footsteps for seven years, waiting for me to trip up. They catch you, they strip you bare and ravish you and then they move on to other people. Everybody in this country has a sex life. Surely they have a right to enjoy that? I have been weak and I have been silly: what can I say?' There was a brief return to the airwaves on an independent local radio station but, by 1996, Bough had disappeared from public view. In the following years he remained out of sight, turning down a chance to return to the screen when Breakfast celebrated its twenty fifth anniversary in 2006. However, in 2014 it was announced that he would step back into the public arena and contribute to a BBC documentary looking at thirty years of Breakfast TV in the UK. Frank Bough was one of Britain's most consummate broadcasters, who won a legion of fans for his calm and friendly manner. He was always worried that he would be remembered only for the tabloid headlines rather than for his many successful years in front of a camera. 'It was a brief but appalling period in my life,' Bough said. 'Don't condemn my entire career for a brief episode I regret.' In retirement, Bough joined a local choir near his home in Berkshire and largely refused to give interviews. He tended his garden and listened to music. In 2001 he underwent a liver transplant following the discovery of a tumour. Bough is survived by Nesta, whom he married in 1959 and their three sons, David, Stephen and Andrew.
Bobby Ball, one half of the comedy double act Cannon and Ball, has died at the age of eventy six after testing positive for coronavirus. His manager, Phil Dale, said in a statement: 'It is with great personal sadness that on behalf of Yvonne Ball and the family and Tommy Cannon, I announce that Bobby Ball passed away at Blackpool Victoria hospital on 28 October 2020. Bobby had been taken to the hospital for tests as he started with breathing problems. At first it was thought to be a chest infection but a test proved positive for Covid-19. His wife, Yvonne, said the hospital and staff could not have been more wonderful, as they were outstanding in their care of duty and they did everything possible for him and she cannot praise them enough. She said that the family and Tommy would like to express their sincere thanks to the many, many people who have been fans of Bobby and they know that they will all share in part the great loss and total sadness that Yvonne, the family and Tommy all feel.' Ball was born Robert Harper in January 1944. A keen amateur singer, he found fame on the comedy circuit and later with The Cannon & Ball Show alongside his lifelong friend Tommy Cannon.
The pair, who met in Oldham, where they worked at a welding factory, began their careers playing pubs and clubs before their first forays into television on Opportunity Knocks in 1969 and on Granada TV's The Wheeltappers & Shunters Social Club in 1974. The Cannon & Ball Show was first broadcast on ITV in 1979 and it continued until 1988, garnering huge audiences. Although somewhat 'old school' in terms to format, there was a certain surreal anarchy about the duo - in particular Ball's aggressive joke-telling and physical comedy - which drew several of the new wave of British comedians to them as guest stars (Rik Mayall, for instance). In 1982, the duo made a film The Boys In Blue although it was a - not entirely undeserved - flop at the box office. Bobby also created the BBC children's cartoon series Juniper Jungle, which was broadcast in 1992. Though their popularity on TV waned as tastes changed, the pair continued to perform in theatre and panto together through the 1990s and into the following decade. Ball also appeared in TV series as diverse as Last Of The Summer Wine, Heartbeat, Mount Pleasant, Benidorm, The Cockfields and won a whole new audience playing Lee Mack's reprobate father in the popular sitcom Not Going Out.
With Cannon, he took part in I'm A Z-List Former Celebrity Desperate To Get My Boat-Race Back On TV ... Please Vote For Me To Stay Here As Long As Possible (I'll Even Eat Worms If You Want) in 2005. In an interview in 2014, Ball recalled falling out with Cannon for three years in the 1980s. 'We started on the shop floor as welders, we went through eighteen years in the clubs and then we got big. We were surrounded by all these people who were gossiping. They wanted to divide and conquer and instead of sitting down and saying "what's wrong?", we stopped speaking,' he said. The pair later reconciled and both became devout Christians, eschewing the hedonistic lifestyle they had enjoyed at the height of their fame. In 2015 it was reported that Ball had begun giving comedy lessons to vicars so they could liven up their sermons. In a statement quoting Ball's catchphrase 'Rock on, Tommy,' Cannon said: 'Rock on, my good friend, I can't believe this, I'm devastated.' Bobby is survived by Yvonne, to whom he was married for forty six years and their children Robert, Darren and Joanne.
According to legend, in 1968 Manchester United arrived in Argentina to play Estudiantes (striped shirts, black panties) in the World Club Championship. As their coach drove down the motorway they saw four banners. The first three read, 'Bobby Charlton, El Campeone', 'Denis Law, El Rey' and 'George Best, El Beatle'. The fourth read: 'Nobby Stiles, El Bandido'! Triumphant, toothless and twirling. Nobby Stiles' dancing was one of the defining images of England's 1966 World Cup victory - he jigged around the perimeter of the Wembley pitch, false teeth out, red socks pulled down to his ankles, tightly gripping the Jules Rimet Trophy in his raised left hand. It was quite a sight. Stiles, who has died aged seventy eight after a long illness, endeared himself to an entire nation with those impulsive, now iconic, post-match celebrations. And, that feeling is not limited just to the generation lucky enough to witness his country's finest football moment first hand. 'Kids of my grandkids' age, they come up to me and go: "Hey, you, you're the fella with no teeth who danced round Wembley, aren't you?,"' he told the Gruniad in 2002. 'In a way, you end up belonging to everyone.' Earlier in that glorious summer of 1966, England's enforcer was not unanimously popular. He was with the supporters, of course - they mostly loved him - but definitely not with the media or with the Football Association. Eventually, the one-time Catholic altar boy won over the critics who were far from enamoured with his combative style. But the modest Mancunian - a kind, warm and unassuming family man off the pitch, rather contradictory to his on-field persona - will be forever remembered as a national hero.
Born Norbert Peter Stiles in May 1942, in Collyhurst - a post-industrial suburb to the North of Manchester city centre - he realised his childhood dream by joining his beloved Manchester United as an apprentice in November 1959. In his 2003 autobiography, he wrote that he had been born 'a half-blind dwarf who was bombed by the Germans and run over by a trolley bus when he was on.' His father, Charlie, was an undertaker: 'When we got the call to go to Old Trafford to sign my contract, he said: "Jump in son and I will take you down there." Now "jump in son' meant in his hearse,"' Stiles remembered. A schoolboy international, he had first joined the club as fifteen year old in 1957 and shared a dressing room with legends including his idol, Eddie Colman. 'My uncle Peter used to take me to Old Trafford and Colman was my hero,' he said. 'Two hours before every match, we would arrive at the ground and because we were so close to the pitch, I could literally touch him as he ran down the wing. At five foot seven he was, like me, one of the smallest in the team. But he had a swagger. Although he looked chunky for his size, he was devastatingly quick over ten to fifteen yards and - something not many people appreciated - [and] he was a strong, committed tackler.' In Eamon Dunphy's book A Strange Kind Of Glory the author (a former teammate) recalled Stiles being given Colman's boots after Eddie's death in the Munich disaster. Nobby, a five foot six inch full-back, was handed his first-team debut in 1960, though only after being sent for an eye test by United's manager, Matt Busby, who was concerned about the number of 'mistimed' tackles made by the teenager. Fitted with jam-jar spectacles off the pitch and contact lenses on it, Stiles' eye for a tigerish tackle instantly improved. A bit. Then Busby had the vision to make a brave tactical decision which would change the trajectory of Stiles' career. The Scot's dilemma was this: he needed an energetic half-back (a defensive midfielder in modern parlance) to break up the opposition attacks and feed his forward line of Bobby Charlton, George Best and Denis Law. Stiles fitted the bill perfectly. He became the fulcrum of the United side which won the 1965 First Division title, eventually catching the eye of England's manager Alf Ramsey as he tried to mastermind the host nation's World Cup assault the following year.
Like Busby, Ramsey knew he had to maximise the talents of Charlton who was central to his plans. He had youngsters like Martin Peters and Alan Ball to do the running leaving Bobby time to find space and create chances for himself, Jimmy Greaves and Geoff Hurst. But, he needed someone to actually win the ball first. Like Busby, Ramsey turned to Stiles. Nobby made his England debut against Scotland at Wembley in April 1965, cementing his place over the next twelve months with a series of zealous, tough performances. But his aggressive ball-winning technique did not please the purists in the media, even during the 1966 World Cup. 'I got absolutely slaughtered in the papers,' Stiles said. 'My job was to win it, give it to Bobby and let him get on with it. The criticism never put me off.' That criticism was not only from journalists, though. Even the FA did not like the balding midfielder's destructive manner. After receiving a retrospective booking following the final group game against France - for what can be somewhat euphemistically described as a 'robust' challenge on Les Bleus playmaker Jacques Simon - the governing body demanded Ramsey drop Stiles for the quarter-final against Argentina. Ramsey refused. 'I was a liability, they said,' Stiles recalled. 'Alf told them he'd resign if he couldn't pick who he wanted. He was prepared to resign in the middle of a World Cup over me. I never found that out until he had died. What a man.'
Ramsey's resistance was vindicated. Not only did Stiles help see off a hostile Argentine side - furiously described as 'animals' by the usually placid Ramsey - he then nullified Portuguese superstar Eusébio in the semi-final as England reached the Wembley showpiece. 'Alf always called me by my full name, Norbert. Just before the Portugal match he took me to one side and said: "Norbert, I want you to take Eusébio out,"' Stiles said. 'I replied: "Do you mean for the game Alf, or for good?"' Eusébio survived, but Portugal didn't. And the rest is etched in English sporting history. Tenacious, aggressive, dirty - descriptions all given to Stiles' style. After all, he did not earn his 'Toothless Tiger' nickname for nothing. But dismissing Stiles as some sort of football Machiavelli would be a gross misjudgement. 'I remember asking Sir Alf once about his 1966 World Cup team,' former Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson said. 'He says he had five world-class players and Nobby was one of them. A great reader of the game - Bobby Charlton always mentions that - influenced the team, could tackle, could pass.' Stiles was selected for the England squad which contested the 1968 European Championships, but the holding role in midfield had been taken by Tottenham's Alan Mullery. Nobby played just once for England in 1969 and twice in 1970. He was selected by Ramsey for the 1970 World Cup in Mexico, but only as Mullery's understudy and remained on the bench. While Stiles will forever be remembered for his influential part in England's 1966 triumph, he will also remain a hero in his home city. Stiles made almost four hundred appearances for The Red Devils between 1960 and 1971, helping them win two league titles (1965 and 1967) and - more notably - the European Cup in 1968 where, once again, he had the task of keeping Eusébio quiet as United beat Benfica at Wembley.
He remains one of only three Englishmen - along with Charlton and Liverpool's Ian Callaghan - to win both a World Cup winner's medal and the European Cup. After leaving Old Trafford, he ended his playing days with brief spells at Middlesbrough and Preston North End, before moving into coaching at Deepdale. However, his managerial career failed to match the same success he enjoyed as a player. The low times which followed his retirement from football and unsuccessful foray into management culminated in thoughts of suicide as he drove his car down the M6 early in 1989. 'Everyone remembers you for the good times but obviously people have bad times as well, everybody, not just me,' Stiles told BBC Sport in 2003. 'You have to go through things - it is the only way you gain experience. The time I had in management was all part of learning and all part of life. In my case it made me realise I was no good at it.' While Stiles felt he had nothing left to offer in management, others saw an opportunity to maximise his talents - namely a wealth of football experience and a trait of being refreshingly honest. United invited him back as youth team coach in 1989, nurturing the likes of Ryan Giggs, Gary Neville, David Beckham and Nicky Butt - a player who reminded Stiles much of himself - from the academy to the first team. Known for being vocal on the pitch, he became a big hit on the after-dinner speaking circuit, regaling attentive punters with dressing-room tales before deteriorating health eventually took him out of the public eye. One common story revolved around the simple instruction he used to be given by Busby before every match: 'Norrie, let him know you're there in there first five minutes.' It was not meant to be a pleasant introduction. But the likeable Stiles, who once said he wanted to be 'remembered as a happy person,' has left a more positive lasting impression on millions of English football fans. In 1968, Stiles released his first autobiography, Soccer My Battlefield; his second, After The Ball, followed in 2003. In 2007, he was inducted into the English Football Hall of Fame. In November 2013, it was announced that Stiles was diagnosed with prostate cancer and in 2016, that he was suffering from advanced dementia. He was too ill to attend a celebration dinner to mark the fiftieth anniversary of England's 1966 World Cup win. In 2017, an acclaimed BBC documentary on the subject of brain injuries amongst retired footballers presented by Alan Shearer included an interview with Stiles' son, John talking about his father's distressing illness. Stiles married Kay Giles in June 1963. His wife was the sister of Nobby's then-teammate at Old Trafford, Johnny Giles. He is survived by Kay and their three sons - John, Peter and Rob.
