Wednesday, September 28, 2011

In My Lonely Room I’d Sit My Mind In An Ice Cream Cone

Philip Glenister has apparently angered the creator of Ashes to Ashes, Matthew Graham. Speaking in this week's Radio Times top promote his new drama, Hidden, Glenister alleged that he had coined the Gene Hunt catchphrase 'Fire up the Quattro!' He said: 'The writers maintain "Fire up the Quattro!" was their idea, but it was mine. They will dispute it but - sorry guys - put it in print,' the actor claimed. However, Graham hit back on Twitter: 'In the Radio Times you will read that Phil created "Fire Up The Quattro!" He didn't. Nor did "the writers". It was me. I have drafts of Ashes going back to before he was even shown the script. Originally it was "fire up the Princess."' The writer further claimed that Glenister was not fond of the line initially, adding: 'I sat down and deliberately coined a phrase that might rival [Life on Mars catchphrase] "armed bastards." Phil didn't like the line. Wanted to drop it.' Graham concluded: 'Thanks Phil. Great timing mate. Thank you for that deluded ego trip. That sideways jibe. That public sneer after I sing your praises. Thanks for reducing five years by referring to [co-creator] Ashley Pharoah and I as "the writers." I've decided to go fishing. I look forward to Phil's next screenplay. I hear it's a thriller that "some writer" helped him with.' Ooo, blimey. Do not piss off The Writer. That's a bad move Philip, you'll never hear the last of it!

ITV has apologised after footage which it claimed was from an IRA propaganda video was, in fact, from a computer game. The pictures were used in Exposure, a documentary broadcast on ITV on Monday which focused on Colonel Gadaffi's links with the republican movement. It claimed that footage labelled 'IRA film 1988' was of terrorists using Libyan weapons to shoot down an aircraft. The pictures were, in fact, from a game called ArmA2. ITV has said the mistake was 'an unfortunate result of human error.' And that the human who erred has not been taken out and shot. The website PC Gamer first raised concerns about the footage which showed black smoke pouring out of the stricken aircraft. In a statement ITV said: 'The events featured in Exposure: Gaddafi and the IRA were genuine but it would appear that during the editing process the correct clip of the 1988 incident was not selected and other footage was mistakenly included in the film by producers. This was an unfortunate case of human error for which we apologise.' The game's developer, Bohemia, said that the studio was not aware ITV had used footage from its game, and branded the case as very misleading. 'It is very weird to see our game used this way, especially considering the journalists were simply unable to tell the difference between reality and game footage and described a short film clearly made using our game ArmA2 with what they call real IRA footage from 1988,' CEO Marek Spanel told Spong. 'At the moment we are gathering further information about the matter but I already had the chance to see the documentary and so far I am not sure how they could make such an obvious mistake.' He added: 'On a somewhat more positive note, we consider this as a bizarre appreciation of the level of realism incorporated into our games.'

ONE Show host Alex Jones has been described as 'dancing like a Thunderbird' in Strictly Come Dancing training by her professional partner, James Jordan. Jones and Jordan are currently in rehearsals for the first Strictly live shows, which launch with a double bill this weekend. Jones will be dancing a cha cha cha. Teasing the TV presenter about her awkwardness on the dancefloor, Jordan revealed that Jones currently has numerous nicknames including 'Bambi stilts, when you have shoes on,' 'kangaroo' and 'oven ready. Because it looks like you're about to put something in the oven.' Talking about her Thunderbird nickname, Jones laughed: 'Don't you always think of Thunderbirds, when you think of the cha cha cha?' Jordan replied: 'No, but when I look at you, I do.'

A financial trader who appeared on the BBC was not a hoaxer, the broadcaster has insisted after doubt was cast on his credentials by those Communist lice scum at the Gruniad Morning Star. It issued a statement after Twitter users suggested that Alessio Rastani was not a trader. 'We've carried out detailed investigations and can't find any evidence to suggest that the interview was a hoax,' the BBC said. In the interview, Rastani said traders 'dream of recessions.' He was interviewed live on the BBC News Channel on Monday and said: 'For most traders, we don't really care that much how they're going to fix the economy, how they're going to fix the whole situation - our job is to make money from it. Personally I've been dreaming of this moment for three years. I have a confession, which is I go to bed every night, I dream of another recession.' He then added: 'The governments don't rule the world. Goldman Sachs rules the world. Goldman Sachs does not care about this rescue package, neither does the big funds.' After Twitter speculation that he was a member of hoaxers The Yes Men, the BBC press office made enquiries and concluded: 'He is an independent market trader and one of a range of voices we've had on air to talk about the recession.' On his website, Rastani describes himself as 'an experienced stock market and forex trader and professional speaker.'

Ofcom has fined Al Ehya Digital Television seventy five thousand spondoolicks for 'repeated breaches' of the broadcasting code in the Saturday Night Special programme aired on Noor TV. Noor TV is a general entertainment and Islamic education channel broadcast on Sky, and Saturday Night Special features presenters taking calls from viewers who donate money to the channel in return for prayers. In June, Ofcom found the show guilty of 'various breaches of its Broadcasting Code,' including 'the exploitation of susceptible viewers, and unfair promotion of products and services.' The regulator said that the offer of 'inducements' for donations of up to one thousand quid, such as 'special gifts' and 'prayers that were claimed to improve the donor's health,' wealth or success, 'carried the risk that susceptible members of the audience may have been persuaded to donate money to Noor TV when they would not otherwise have done so. In particular, the appeal focused heavily on religious beliefs, which Ofcom considered had created an additional risk that susceptible viewers would have been more likely to make donations than they otherwise would have done,' the regulator added. Ofcom said that it was 'extremely concerned' that viewers donating money via the website of charity the Mohiuddin Trust under the belief that it was to fund Noor TV's programming were being 'misled,' because it understood that the cash did not actually go to its stated purpose. The watchdog also said that Saturday Night Special breached its rules by 'overly promoting a DVD.' Ofcom has decided that the breaches were 'sufficiently serious' as to require the imposition of a financial penalty of seventy five thousand smackers on Noor TV operator Al Ehya Digital Television. The fine is payable to the Paymaster General. Post-dated cheques are not acceptable, they want it in cash. Noor TV must also broadcast a statement of Ofcom's findings in a form and on a date decided by the regulator.

BBC3 has axed behind-the-scenes show Doctor Who Confidential. The series originally launched in 2005 to tie in with Doctor Who's revival. However, Confidential will not continue after the current sixth run due to BBC budget cuts, according to the Gruniad. BBC3's controller Zai Bennett is reportedly keen on 'focusing investment on original commissions in the future.' Bennett has recently cancelled a number of long-running BBC3 shows, including Ideal, Hotter Than My Daughter, Coming of Age and Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps. In a statement, a BBC spokeswoman said: 'Doctor Who Confidential has been a great show for BBC3 over the years, but our priority now is to build on original British commissions, unique to the channel.'

Terry O'Quinn has signed up for more episodes of Hawaii Five-0. The former Lost star was originally contracted to appear in six episodes of the CBS drama's second season. O'Quinn's role as Joe White has now been expanded, executive producer Peter Lenkov told TV Guide. 'His original deal was six episodes, and now we'll do another three,' he revealed. 'And we're hoping for even more.' O'Quinn recently admitted that he is keen to reunite on-screen with Lost co-star Michael Emerson. He has also signed up for a role in Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry's new ABC pilot Hallelujah, which is currently undergoing re-writes. 'Terry's a guy who really wants to get his own show, and he deserves that,' said Lenkov. That's his goal. But we'd love to make it work where he could do both.'

The Cure will play their first three LP in full at a rare UK show and again in the US later this year. The band will play Three Imaginary Boys, Seventeen Seconds and Faith at London's Royal Albert Hall on Tuesday 15 November. Labelled The Reflections Show, the band previously played the set at the Vivid Festival in Sydney. The Cure follow the London date with three US shows at the Pantages Theatre, LA on 21, 22 and 23 November and further dates at the Beacon Theatre, NYC on 25, 26 and 27 November.

Barry Gibb lookalike Robbie Savage has admitted: 'I'm not very good at all' Frankly, football fans have been telling the loudmouthed ex-Welsh international that for nearly two decades.

Sky News and the BBC's live coverage of the Labour party conference in Liverpool went off air for a few minutes during Ed Milimolmandi's keynote speech on Tuesday afternoon after a generator failed. It was particularly embarrassing for Sky as this occurred just after Milimolimandi had spoken of how 'sickened' he'd been by the revelations that the Scum of the World had hacked the phone of Milly Dowler. The Labour leader's address to the conference disappeared for about five minutes due to a technical fault with a contractor's truck that was supplying pooled footage to broadcasters. The BBC News channel switched to 5Live's audio coverage while the problem was being fixed but BBC2, which was also showing the speech, went blank. A BBC spokesman said: 'It was a technical fault caused by a generator failure in a contractor's truck which was supplying a pooled feed to broadcasters.' A spokesman for Sky News explained: 'Unfortunately during Ed Miliband's speech a junction box powering some of the broadcast trucks tripped and as a result we lost the feed to our live link. An alternative method of transmission was used via satellite to re-establish the live link. This process took approximately five minutes.' There were suggestions on Twitter that in the interests of balance and to avoid 'suggestions of conspiracy' the broadcasters should also go off air for the same amount of time during David Cameron's speech at the Conservative Party conference in October. Which would be a blessing.

A court in Saudi Arabia has sentenced a woman to ten lashes for breaking the country's ban on female drivers. You have to pay good money for that sort of thing down in Soho. Or, you know, so this blogger is led to believe. The woman, identified only as Shema, was found guilty of driving in Jeddah in July. Women2drive, which campaigns for women to be allowed to drive in Saudi Arabia, says she has already lodged an appeal. In recent months, scores of women have driven vehicles in Saudi cities in an effort to put pressure on the monarchy to change the law. The sentence comes two days after the Saudi leader King Abdullah announced women would be allowed to vote for the first time in 2015. Two other women are due to appear in court later this year on similar charges, correspondents say.

The latest Keith Telly Topping's 45 of the Day considers that there's time much hatred and nastiness in the world. It's time to let the Love in. Sing, Arthur.