Wednesday, November 25, 2009

The Zeppo?

Girls Aloud singer Nicola Roberts - that's, err, 'the ginger one' if you're not as familiar as Keith Telly Topping with the fact that they actually have individual personalities - has reportedly been given her own BBC show - just two days after her band-mate, Cheryl Cole, got one from ITV. According to the Sun, the twenty four-year-old will front a film about women who are addicted to tanning products. Since Girls Aloud took an extended break after their recent Out Of Control tour, Roberts has been busy launching her own Dainty Doll make-up range for girls with the paler complexion. Now ... Given the inherent copycat nature of much modern television, next no doubt we'll have news of Five's Christmas Day with Sarah Harding...

Lloyd Daniels has reportedly threatened to quit The X Factor. According to the Daily Mail, the Welsh singer was said to be upset by comments from judge Louis Walsh when he escaped the bottom two at the weekend. Walsh said: 'I can't believe Lloyd is still here.' He later added - on The Xtra Factor: 'I thought it would have been Lloyd in the bottom two because he's been there, like, three times. Olly [Murs] did not deserve to be in the bottom two.' Daniels is said to have broken down in tears after the programme and told producers: 'I'm going, I can't carry on.' Okay, bye then... Jeeza, what a drama queen.

The episode of the American series Bones shown on Sky One at 11pm on Sunday 15 November achieved an Audience Appreciation Index score of ninety seven out of one hundred - which I think I'm right in saying is the highest AI score ever recorded on British TV. It was the most recent Stephen Fry episode if anyone was wondering.

Programmes like Skins are to face a tougher approvals process to get onto BBC-branded international channels under new rules. BBC Worldwide distributes other UK-originated shows such as Primeval, Skins and Gordon's Kitchen Nightmares and broadcasts them on BBC-branded channels internationally. But as part of the BBC Trust's review of Worldwide activity, published yesterday, channels such as BBC America will be subject to new 'quantitative and qualitative metrics' to ensure that any third-party content they air reflects the BBC's 'high brand and editorial standards.' Trust chairman Sir Michael Lyons said: 'As we reduce the UK focus of BBC Worldwide, the company will put more of its energy overseas. The issue there is not competitive impact, but to make sure that what's done in the name of the BBC is consistent with BBC values. It's for BBCW to decided what non-BBC programmes to distribute and to whom, but what appears on BBC channels in other countries must not be content that we'd be unhappy to show on the BBC in the UK.'

Fox has ordered a full season of the Tim Roth-fronted psychological crime drama Lie to Me, according to Entertainment Weekly. Executive producer Shawn Ryan broke the news on Twitter, ahead of an official announcement from the network. 'Picked up for a back nine,' he posted. 'Thanks for all the support everyone.' This news pleases Keith Telly Topping greatly.

The stomach-churning I'm A Celebrity ... bushtucker trials are set to get their own spin-off, according to the Sun. The tasks - such as eating kangaroo testicles and witchetty grubs - will form the centrepiece of new prime-time series, The Door. The Saturday night programme will feature celebrities completing tasks that they find behind different coloured doors. Popular trials from I'm A Celebrity ... like munching fried crickets are expected to be included as well as some horrific new ordeals. Yes, dear blog reader, every time you think television has hit a new low, along comes something to surprise you.

Great Britain has dominated the winners list at this year's International Emmy Awards, hosted by Graham Norton on Monday evening at the New York Hilton. British actors Ben Whishaw and Julie Walters were recognised as the best actor and actress respectively, while UK-made programmes The Mona Lisa Curse, Dustbin Baby and The Ascent of Money also won awards. Sir David Frost was given the Founders Award for lifetime achievement in the industry. Japanese show Hoshi Shinichi's Short Shorts won the Best Comedy prize and Denmark's The Protectors was named Best Drama Series.

Victoria Wood has admitted to Radio Times that she hates watching herself on screen. Yeah, Keith Telly Topping hates watching Victoria Wood on screen as well. Funny that, isn't it? Well ... funnier than anything Victoria's been involved in since about 1980, anyway.

Hannah Waterman has reportedly dropped ten dress sizes in just under five months. According to Heat magazine, the former EastEnders actress embarked on a strict diet for her new exercise DVD Hannah Waterman's Body Blitz. Waterman reportedly claimed that the weight loss was achieved through exercise and the help of Loughborough University's expert Martin MacDonald. 'I didn't want to do a crash diet - you have to lose weight steadily,' she said. 'I've been interval training, which means getting your heart-rate really high and then dropping it down again then getting it high again. It's hard, but it works.' Meanwhile, Waterman's actor boyfriend Ricky Groves has reportedly lost two stone since taking part in Strictly Come Dancing.

The BBC have reportedly received a small number of complaints from listeners to Sarah Kennedy's Radio2 show who felt that playing Susan Boyle's version of the Julie London classic 'Cry Me A River' and dedicating it to the people of Cumbria was, perhaps, not the most tactful or delicate thing that could have occurred after the recent flooding. Speaking of complaints, all of this somewhat reminds Keith Telly Topping about a spectacular one from a few years ago which was widely reported at the time. A viewers was said to have written to the BBC noting that whilst they normally enjoyed the comedy quiz Qi they had been 'disgusted' by comments in the previous week's episode 'by that wretched Jo Brand woman.' Upon being asked by Stephen Fry whether she would like to have 'a crack' at something, Brand had seemingly replied 'no, but I'd wave my crack at it.' The viewer said they considered this to be 'one of the most tasteless and disgusting' comments they had ever heard on television. They went on to note that the BBC's likely response - that this show was broadcast after the watershed - cut no ice with the complainer. 'I simply don't care what the time of day it is, I have no wish to have Jo Brand's crack shoved down my throat.' Horrorshow.

The BBC has launched a new nationwide online test to map the way in which personality affects the daily lives of people living in Britain. As part of the BBC1 Child Of Our Time project, the corporation's Lab UK website will host The Big Personality Test. Despite personalities being as unique as fingerprints, the team believes that everyone fits into five basic types - extroversion, neuroticism, openness, agreeableness and conscientiousness. The public can take part in the test to see if they fit into one of the types, with all contributors to receive personalised video feedback from professor Robert Winston, including information about the dominant traits of their personality. A host of celebrities - including Fay Ripley, Lauren Laverne, Jo Whiley, Dan Snow and Evan Davis - have already taken part in the test. The results will be broadcast in spring 2010 during a two-part Child Of Our Time special. Professor Winston, who will present the show with Sophie Raworth, described the test as 'an extremely ambitious project.' He added: 'With the help of people from all over the UK, from Land's End to John O'Groats, this stands to be the largest ever profile of British personality. It will help scientists answer one of the biggest questions in psychology: How much does personality shape our destiny?' Cambridge University's professor Michael Lamb will assess the results and try to gain a greater insight into how personality affects an individual's circumstances.

Coronation Street actress Michelle Keegan will allegedy sing Celebrity Rockaoke in aid of injured British soldiers. Oh, for God's sake, haven't those poor guys suffered enough already?

ABC has reportedly halted production on their new drama FlashForward. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the show, which stars Joseph Fiennes, Sonya Walger and Jack Davenport, will take a six-day hiatus and is expected to resume production next week. A representative for the network is quoted as saying: 'They want to maintain the high quality of the show and this gives the writers the opportunity to do so.' FlashForward has pulled in an average of 9.43m viewers over its nine-week run although audiences have been falling towards eight million in recent weeks.

US celebrity chef Paula Deen was accidentally hit by a ham during a recent charity event, according to the Associated Press. The Food Network star was reportedly helping a homeless organisation unload the produce in Atlanta yesterday when someone jokingly the threw the ham at her. Speaking to local station WGCL-TV she said: 'I thought it busted my lip but it didn't! I'm okay, it just knocked me for a little bit!' Her representative later told Us magazine: '[She was] startled at first, but quickly regained focus and kept her humour. She's okay now and is icing her face.' Deen explained that she had thrown a ham to another volunteer but had not expected him to throw it back to her.

Alex Reid has released a statement about his split from I'm A Celebrity... loser, Katie Price. The glamour model confirmed that she had ended her relationship with Reid during an interview with Ant and Dec on ITV on Sunday. Price had been urged to end her romance with the cage fighter by her mother and close friend Michelle Heaton. Commenting on the news, Reid's spokesperson said: 'Following yesterday's surprise revelations that Alex Reid's relationship with Katie Price has apparently ended, Cage Fighter Films Ltd, with whom Alex has contractual obligations and responsibilities, would like to make it clear that he will continue with his business meetings associated with the film Cage Rage at undisclosed locations in Australia. Naturally there are ongoing telephone conversations between the couple, but Alex has no further comment to make at this time regarding the state of their relationship.' ITV cameras reportedly filmed Price singing Queen's 'Another One Bites The Dust' after ending the relationship. What a class act, eh? Ever get the feeling you've been used, Alex? Join the queue, mate, it's quite a long one.

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