Sunday, April 15, 2018

God Spits On My Soul

Here, dear blog readers, are the latest on-location photos from the forthcoming eleventh series of Doctor Who.
Yer actual Russell Davies has recently adapted his first Doctor Who episode for a new novel and included some interesting changes to the original story - but if this had you hoping, dear blog reader, that he might return to the series, the former showrunner is putting such speculation to bed. 'People keep asking me if I'll write another episode,' Davies said in the latest issue of the Doctor Who Magazine, where he took over the regular Production Notes column that he used to contribute during his time as showrunner from 2005 to 2010. 'Move on! And besides, why look back? The future is golden. People keep saying, "Oh you're back in Doctor Who, back, back, back."' Big Rusty said of the recent Target novelisation of Rose. 'But ... I never went away! I'm a Doctor Who fan. It's permanent. It's indelible, it's instinct.'
Meanwhile, dear blog reader, somewhere at a book-signing in London ...
The script for the first episode of Doctor Who, as used by William Hartnell, is being auctioned next month. The script for An Unearthly Child is forty three pages long and contains blue pencil annotations made by Hartnell as he was developing the character of The Doctor. It was discovered by the vendor's grandfather whilst refurbishing the home lived in by Hartnell and his wife, Heather, during the time that Hartnell was working on the series. The script featured in an episode of Antiques Roadshow broadcast last Christmas. The script is being sold by Aston's Auctioneers and Valuers at their Film & Music Memorabilia & Comics Auction on Thursday 3 May. It is expected to raise between five and seven grand. From a collector with more money than sense.
TV Comedy Moment Of The Week: 'What is the tell-tale sign, according to [Russian politicians Aleksey Pushkov], that Theresa May drinks a lot?' asked the divine Victoria Coren-Mitchell, hosting a very good episode of Have I Got News For You on Friday evening. 'Is it appointing Boris Johnson Foreign Secretary?' suggested Richard Osman.
'He is a maniac. An anarchist. He is not interested in money or power ... and I am an honest criminal, Jim!' In the week that finally - after two years - the series returned to British TV (albeit, having missed a series out entirely, much to the chagrin of a shitload of viewers who weren't aware of this), Gotham's latest episode in the US - That's Entertainment - was a proper little blinder. Not only did we get a glimpse of a kind of early version of the Batmobile but, also, what appears - at last - to be the origin backstory of The Joker. Reviews can get read here, here, here, here and here.
The MasterChef 2018 winner announced on Friday, was Kenny Tutt. The bank manager and dad-of-two won the BBC cooking competition's trophy, finishing ahead of David Crichton and Nawamin Pinpathomrat. 'Today was one hundred per cent my best cooking in the entire competition everything just fell into place,' the thirty six-year-old said. 'I am just blown away. I have put my heart and soul into it and it's been an absolute pleasure. It's up there with the happiest days of my life!' Judges Gregg Wallace and John Torode were full of praise for Kenny's winning menu, which included a roast scallop and smoked cauliflower starter, squab pigeon breast and bon-bon main, and bitter chocolate and ale ice-cream dessert.
The latest episode of The Simpsons has addressed largely social media-created 'controversy' surrounding the character of Apu for the first time. The Indian-American comic Hari Kondabolu made a documentary last year in which he claimed that the character was 'founded on racial stereotypes.' Sunday's episode made a reference to the accusations. Shopkeeper Apu Nahasapeemapetilon has been part of the long-running animation series since 1990 and is voiced by a white actor - Hank Azaria. Kondabolu told the BBC last year that the character was 'problematic' because he is 'defined by his job' and 'how many children he has' in his arranged marriage. In his documentary, The Problem With Apu, Kondabolu said Apu was one of the only representations of South-East Asians on US television when he was growing up and other children imitated the character to mock him. During the new episode of The Simpsons, Marge and Lisa indirectly discuss the controversy around the characterisation. In the scene, Marge changes a traditional bedtime story to make it more 'politically correct,' but her daughter objects. A distressed Marge then asks her daughter what she is supposed to do. Lisa turns to the camera and says: 'It's hard to say. Something that started a long time ago decades ago, that was applauded and was inoffensive, is now politically incorrect. What can you do?' She then looks at a photograph of Apu by on her bedside. Some people on social media - albeit, no one that you've ever actually heard of - claimed the brief reference brushed off an important debate, while others pointed out that a lot of characters in Springfield are based on broad stereotypes. And, this utter and complete trivial bollocks constitutes 'news', apparently.
Wor Geet Canny Declan Donnelly will host the Britain's Got Toilets live shows without Wor Geet Canny Ant McPartlin, ITV has confirmed. The broadcaster said Dec will host the live shows without his long-term co-presenter 'while Ant steps down from his TV commitments for now.' Due, in no small part, to his forthcoming court appearance. McPartlin was extremely charged with a drink-driving offence last month following a three-vehicle smash in London. He will still feature in the audition episodes of the upcoming series of Britain's Got Toilets, as they were filmed in January. In recent years, the talent show's live semi-finals and final have been screened nightly across a week, usually at the end of May, with the audition shows broadcast in the weeks leading up to it. In a statement released on Tuesday, ITV said: 'We send Ant all our love. And, we know that Dec will do a brilliant job. McPartlin who spent time in rehab last year for painkiller and alcohol addiction, announced after his arrest on 18 March that he was 'stepping down' from his TV roles while he had further treatment. He is due to appear up a'fore The Beak on 16 April. Following his arrest, his publicist said that he was taking time off 'for the foreseeable future.' One episode of ITV's Wor Geet Canny Ant and/or Dec's Saturday Night Takeaway was cancelled and the final two episodes were presented solo by Wor Geet Canny Dec. After the live series finale on Saturday, Donnelly told the audience that the shows had been 'fun' but 'tinged with sadness.' He called for a round of applause for his presenting partner of almost thirty years, saying Wor Geet Canny Ant was 'back at home' and would 'appreciate that.' Although, whether the people whose cars he crashed into would is another matter entirely.
Media watchdog Ofcom - a full-of-their-own-importance politically appointed quango, elected by no one - has rebuked the BBC over a radio interview with climate change sceptic and Tory cocksplash, Lord Lawson last August. It found that Radio 4's Today programme had extremely breached broadcasting rules by 'not sufficiently challenging' the former chancellor of the exchequer. The BBC has admitted the item in question broke its guidelines and said that Lord Lawson should have been challenged 'more robustly' than he was. It is the first time that Ofcom has found the BBC in breach since taking over regulation of the corporation in 2017. 'Statements made about the science of climate change were not challenged sufficiently during this interview, which meant the programme was not duly accurate,' said an Ofcom spokeswoman on Monday. In the interview broadcast on 10 August last year, the ex-chancellor claimed that 'official figures' showed average world temperatures had 'slightly declined'. Which they don't or anything even remotely like it. He also claimed that the UN's Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change had 'confirmed' there had not been 'an increase in extreme weather events' for the last ten years. This view, which was also shown to be false by the Met Office, was not challenged on-air by the presenter, Justin Webb. In its ruling, the broadcasting regulator ruled there was 'clear editorial justification for the topic of climate change to be covered. However, in doing so the BBC needed to ensure that the topic was reported with due accuracy and due impartiality. The programme did not clearly signal to listeners that [Lord Lawson's] view on the science of climate change ran counter to the weight of scientific opinion in this field,' Ofcom continued. 'In our view the presenter should have been prepared to provide challenge and context to Lord Lawson's views as appropriate.' The Ofcom ruling follows an incident in 2014, when the BBC itself upheld a complaint over another Today programme interview with Lawson about the same subject. After that appearance, the BBC's editorial complaints unit upheld complaints from three listeners that Today had given 'undue weight' to his repugnant and crappy views and had 'conveyed a misleading impression' of the scientific evidence. 'We've told the BBC we are concerned that this was the second incident of this nature and on the same programme,' said Ofcom's spokeswoman on Monday. The result of which will, hopefully, be that the odious Lawson will be banished from the airwaves forever. Which would be excellent.
Channel Four News has come under fire from viewers after its Sunday night evening news bulletin featured a graphic scene of an accident involving a Formula 1 mechanic. During last week's Bahrain Grand Prix, a Ferrari mechanic was hospitalised following an incident which saw driver Kimi Raikkonen accidentally run over the mechanic's leg during a pit-stop. Ferrari later confirmed that the mechanic, Francesco Cigarini, had been taken to hospital for treatment. He has since had successful surgery on his leg and is currently recovering. Channel Four's Formula 1 coverage team and the F1 world feed - along with Sky F1's coverage of the race - took care not to show the accident in too much detail after it had happened, with C4F1 presenter Steve Jones saying at one point during the post-race analysis show: 'We're not gonna see the guy hurting himself, we're going to censor that out.' However, during the Channel Four News bulletin, the broadcaster reported on the race and showed the incident in graphic detail - prompting 'many' viewers to criticise their decision to show the clip. After the race, Ferrari provided an update on Cigarini and confirmed that he had suffered a rather nasty broken leg. 'Apparently a shinbone and fibula fracture, our thoughts are with Francesco, stay strong,' the account tweeted.
BBC Breakfast's Mike Bushell's interviewed with a group of England's Commonwealth Games swimmers, including Adam Peaty but it took a turn for the worse as he accidentally fell in the pool. Which, to be fair, was bloody funny.
Pauley Perrette has officially wrapped work after fifteen years on NCIS. Since 2003, Perrette has anchored the Naval Criminal Investigative Service team through various shifting personnel line-ups as forensic specialist Abby Sciuto and gained a cult following. Perrette shared some photos from her final day of filming on social media, revealing that some of her last scenes would be shared with Sean Murray, Wilmer Valderrama, Brian Dietzen and Emily Wickersham. Along with a plug that her final episode will be broadcast on 8 May in the US, Perrette made sure to tell her co-stars: 'Love ya'all!'
Geoffrey Rush is 'virtually housebound' and believes that his career has been 'irreparably damaged' following the publication of an allegation against him, his lawyers have claimed. He is extremely suing Sydney's Daily Telegraph for defamation over articles which claimed that he was 'suspected of inappropriate behaviour towards a fellow performer.' Rush, who strenuously denies the allegation, had since endured 'tremendous emotional and social hardship,' court documents said. The newspaper has defended its reports. The articles, published last year, alleged that Rush had been accused of 'behaving inappropriately' during a Sydney Theatre Company production of King Lear in 2015. The allegation was not detailed. The actor accused the newspaper of 'false and spurious claims' when he filed a defamation lawsuit in December. Rush is one of Australia's most celebrated actors, having starred in films including Shine, Elizabeth, Pirates Of The Caribbean and The King's Speech. The newspaper's articles had caused 'ongoing hurt' to the actor, according to documents tendered in the Federal Court of Australia on Monday. This included him 'eating little food, having difficulty sleeping and feeling anxious in public,' his lawyers said. The Oscar-winning actor now regarded his worth to the industry as 'irreparably damaged,' the documents added. 'The applicant has found that as a direct result of the publications he has been constantly associated in Australia and internationally with the Me Too movement,' they detailed. The newspaper has argued that its articles were 'not defamatory' and that it reported 'no accusations of a sexual nature.' Oneor two people even believed them. Last month, Justice Michael Wigney struck out substantial parts of the newspaper's 'defence of truth.' The newspaper has appealed against that decision.
Rebel Wilson will recoup an additional sum for legal costs after being awarded Australia's largest defamation payout, a court has ruled. Wilson successfully sued publisher Bauer Media last year over magazine articles that she said portrayed her as 'a serial liar.' Bauer has appealed against the four and a half million Australian dollar payout. On Thursday, the court confirmed that the publisher would also have to pay 'most' of the actress's legal fees. Australian media reported the costs were 'likely' to exceed one million dollars after the Supreme Court of Victoria rejected Wilson's initial bid for A$1.4 million. The exact sum will be negotiated in a separate court. The size of the defamation payout has generated considerable debate in Australia over whether it could 'stifle journalism' that is claimed to be in the public interest. Wilson has said the articles, published in 2015, contained 'grubby and completely false' allegations that she had lied about her name, age and upbringing in Australia. She said the stories had damaged her career in Hollywood, where she has starred in films including Pitch Perfect and Bridesmaids. Bauer had argued the articles were 'not defamatory,' but a jury was having none of it and sided with the actress. She immediately vowed to give her payout to charity. The publisher's appeal is due to be heard next week. Last month, six Australian media firms lost a bid to appeal against the payout on 'public interest' grounds, after a judge ruled it was not sufficiently different to Bauer's appeal.
Prosecutors in Los Angeles are reported to be 'reviewing' a historical sexual assault accusation against Kevin Spacey, officials have confirmed. Police have filed evidence about an allegation involving an incident with a man in West Hollywood in 1992. More than thirty men have come forward with allegations of sexual misconduct against the Oscar-winning actor in recent months. The Los Angeles Sheriff's Department said on Wednesday that it began investigating the case in December and presented it to the Los Angeles District Attorney office for review earlier this month. No details of the allegation have been released. It is unclear if California's statute of limitations on prosecuting criminal sexual assault, which is normally ten years, would apply. Spacey first became embroiled in controversy last November when the actor Anthony Rapp accused him of a sexual advance in 1986 when he was fourteen and Spacey was twenty six. Spacey claimed to have 'no memory' of the events but, nevertheless, publicly apologised. He has since issued an 'absolute' denial of the other allegations which later emerged. Police in London are investigating three potential criminal cases against him. The Old Vic theatre in London, where he was artistic director, has said that it has received twenty complaints of 'inappropriate behaviour' against him. The controversy has led to the actor being axed from a number of roles, including from Netflix series House Of Cards and the movie All The Money In The World, which was re-shot without him.
American actor and comedian TJ Miller has been charged for 'intentionally reporting a fake bomb threat' whilst travelling on a train, officials said. Miller, who allegedly called police from the train to report a female passenger with 'a bomb in her bag,' was arrested in New York on Monday. The incident, which occurred on 18 March, led to the Amtrak train being searched without any device being found. Miller faces up to five years in The Big House if found guilty of the charge. The actor, who is best known for his role as Erlich Bachman in the US comedy series Silicon Valley, has featured in a number of Hollywood films such as Deadpool and Cloverfield. According to a statement released on Tuesday by the US Attorney for the District of Connecticut, the thirty six-year-old allegedly initially told officers that a woman with 'brown hair and a scarf' was carrying a device on a train travelling from Washington DC to New York. When an investigator called him back, he claimed the woman had 'red hair and a red scarf' and was 'clutching a black suitcase.' He said, according to the statement, that the passenger 'kept checking her bag without taking anything out' and seemed to want to alight the train without it. 'I am worried for everyone on that train, someone has to check that lady out,' he is quoted as saying. The officer on the phone reportedly detected slurring in Miller's voice and asked him if he had consumed any alcohol, to which he replied: 'One glass of red wine.' The Amtrak train was later inspected at a stop in Connecticut and was found not to contain any explosive devices or materials. During the stop, Amtrak officers interviewed a member of staff from the first class area where Miller had earlier been sitting. The member of staff said that Miller 'appeared intoxicated' upon boarding in Washington, that he had 'consumed multiple drinks' on the train and that he had been removed in New York 'owing to his state of intoxication.' Amtrak officers were also told that Miller had been involved in 'hostile exchanges' with a woman in a different row in the same carriage. Miller, who has been released on bail, has not yet commented on the charges. Officials said that the charges - reported on Tuesday - were 'allegations and not evidence of guilt.' However the case is, reportedly, 'being treated as serious' and is being investigated by the FBI's Joint Terrorism Task Force, the Connecticut State Police, Metropolitan Transportation Authority Police Department, Amtrak Police Department, and Westport Police Department.
If you're going to avoid a tough question, you might want to do it a bit more subtly than Amber Rudd did on Sky News this week. The Home Secretary was interviewed about the Home Office's promise that it will spend forty million knicker on a new strategy aimed at tackling violent crime and, unsurprisingly, a Sky News reporter wanted to know where it was going to come from. 'Can I ask about the money? Forty million pounds, it's not new money, it's coming from within the existing Home Office budget? It does seem to suggest that something has to be cut in order to fund it,' he asked. 'No, this is part of the Home Office budget. I am choosing to make sure that serious violence is seen as the priority that it is to me. It ruins lives, it destroys families,' Rudd responded. 'Serious violence, attacking it, reducing it, is a priority for me. That's why we are putting substantial funds, forty million pounds behind it.' Aware that she had, basically, avoided answering the question she'd been asked, the reporter pushed again to find out what was 'going to be cut for it.' After a brief pause (and a voice in the background saying 'we've got another interview'), Rudd decided to continue not answering and just said 'thank you very much' before promptly walking off. So that's cleared that up, then.
Billionaire tyrant Rupert Murdoch's film and media giant Twenty First Century FOX says that it 'is cooperating' with the European Commission after officials raided its FOX Network offices in London. EC competition authorities are reported to have seized documents relating to sport media rights on Tuesday. Other companies involved in sports rights have also received what the EC called 'unannounced inspections.' Which is a nice way of saying 'dawn raids.' It is unclear which other companies were raided and when. 'The commission has concerns that the companies involved may have violated EU anti-trust rules that prohibit cartels and restrictive business practices,' the European Commission said in a statement. 'Unannounced inspections are a preliminary step into suspected anti-competitive practices.' The statement said that it 'does not mean that the companies are guilty of anti-competitive behaviour, nor does it prejudge the outcome of the investigation itself.' One or two people even believed them. Sports broadcasting has become a huge business in Europe and the US, with networks spending billions of knicker to secure exclusive rights to show games in top-flight leagues to attract viewers. FOX Networks Group is an operating unit of FOX, which distributes TV and cable channels and content around the world. 'FOX Networks Group is cooperating fully with the EC inspection,' a spokesman said. Although exactly what would have happened if they had decided not to 'cooperate fully' was not made clear. The move comes amid a shake-up of billionaire tyrant Murdoch's empire. Twenty First Century FOX has agreed to sell most of its entertainment assets, including its stake in Sky, to Disney for over fifty two billion dollars. But in February, US giant Comcast offered thirty one billion notes for Sky. As part of the shake-up and deal with Disney, Twenty First Century is trying to buy the sixty one per cent of Sky it does not own, a proposal which has run into problems with the competition authorities. The Commission said there was no legal deadline to complete inquiries into anti-competitive conduct and EC investigations can be lengthy.
Disney will have to make a full takeover bid for Sky even if the competition regulator quashes billionaire tyrant Rupert Murdoch's eleven billion smackers attempt to buy one hundred per cent of Britain's biggest pay-TV broadcaster, the UK takeover panel has ruled. The owner of Walt Disney Studios has made a bid to take over Twenty First Century FOX. Meanwhile, it is awaiting the outcome of the UK competition regulator's verdict on whether to allow billionaire tyrant Murdoch to buy the sixty one per cent of Sky which he does not already own - a deal that was pending before the Disney transaction. If the Competition and Markets Authority clears billionaire tyrant Murdoch's bid and Disney is, in turn, allowed to complete its FOX deal, then Sky will come under the full ownership of the conglomerate. However, in December Disney turned its attention to an alternative scenario should billionaire tyrant Murdoch's bid for Sky fail. It made a submission to the UK takeover panel, the city watchdog for corporate deals, saying that it 'did not wish to be forced to pursue a full takeover' if billionaire tyrant Murdoch failed to take full control of Sky. Under rule 9.1 of the takeover code, companies are normally forced to make an offer if they buy a stake of thirty per cent or more. Disney argued that owning Sky was 'not a major driver' of its overall FOX deal - which includes buying Hollywood studio Twentieth Century FOX - and so that rule should not apply. The takeover panel disagreed on Thursday. 'The panel executive considers that securing control of Sky might reasonably be considered to be a significant purpose of Disney's acquiring control of FOX,' it said. 'Following the acquisition by Disney of FOX, Disney will be required to make a mandatory offer to the holders of ordinary shares in Sky.' The takeover panel said that if Disney was required to make a separate offer to take control of Sky then it would be at £10.75 a share, the same price that billionaire tyrant Rupert Murdoch has tabled and has been accepted by Sky's directors. Analysts believe that Sky is undervalued: it is trading at thirteen quid per share and could be valued at up to sixteen knicker a share. 'At this stage, Sky shareholders are advised to take no further action,' Sky said in a statement on Thursday. 'Further advice to Sky shareholders will be announced in due course.' Earlier this month, Disney offered to 'investigate' whether adding its ownership to billionaire tyrant Rupert Murdoch's control of the Sun and Times will give them too much power over UK news media. Disney's move would, at a stroke, solve the media plurality issues that have dogged billionaire tyrant Murdoch and blocked deal approval. A frustrated FOX has said it could easily get the deal through by shutting Sky News, a threat it would be unlikely to carry out because of the political fallout. Media regulator Ofcom has said that the loss of Sky News could, itself, 'present risks to plurality equal to or greater than those presented by the transaction itself.' Instead, FOX has beefed up its pledge to make Sky News 'independent' within the Sky operation. FOX has said it will fund Sky News for at least fifteen years, up five years on its previous offer and ten years more than its original proposal.
A businessman fighting for the 'right to be forgotten' has won a UK High Court action against Google. The man, who has not been named 'due to reporting restrictions' surrounding the case (and, due to the fact that he wants to be forgotten, obviously), wanted search results about a past crime he had extremely committed removed from the search engine. The judge, Mr Justice Mark Warby, ruled in his favour on Friday. But he rejected a separate claim made by another businessman who had committed 'a more serious crime.' The businessman who won his case was convicted ten years ago of 'conspiring to intercept communications.' He spent six months in The Big House. The other businessman, who lost his case, was convicted 'more than ten years ago' of 'conspiring to account falsely.' He spent four years in jail. Both had asked Google to remove search results about their convictions, including links to news articles, stating that they were 'no longer relevant.' They took Google to court when it refused to remove the search results. Google said that it would 'accept the rulings.' Not that it could do much else. 'We work hard to comply with the right to be forgotten, but we take great care not to remove search results that are in the public interest,' it said in a statement. 'We are pleased that the court recognised our efforts in this area and we will respect the judgements they have made in this case.' The right to be forgotten is a legal precedent set by the Court of Justice of the European Union in 2014, following a case brought by a Spaniard, Mario Costeja Gonzalez, who had asked Google to remove information about his financial history. Google says that it has removed eight hundred thousand pages from its results following so-called 'right to be forgotten' requests. However, search engines can decline to remove pages if they judge them to 'remain in the public interest.' Explaining the decisions made on Friday, the judge said that one of the men had 'continued to mislead the public' while the other had 'shown remorse.' Although, what the Hell that had to do with the suppression of a matter of public record is another question entirely. The Open Rights Group, which campaigns for Internet freedoms, said that the rulings set a 'legal precedent. The right to be forgotten is meant to apply to information that is no longer relevant but disproportionately impacts a person,' said Jim Killock, executive director. 'The Court will have to balance the public's right to access the historical record, the precise impacts on the person and the public interest.'
Dame Helen Mirren has said that the rise of watching films on streaming services at home is 'devastating' for people who want to make films for the big screen. No shit? And, in other news The Pope is still Catholic, apparently.
Heather Locklear has pleaded extremely not guilty to four counts of battery against a sheriff's officer. Locklear has also pleaded not guilty to another charge of resisting or obstructing a police officer. The former Dynasty actress was represented by a lawyer at Ventura County Superior Court in California on Thursday and did not appear in person. She was arrested on domestic violence charges in February. Those charges were dropped but the other counts remain. According to People magazine, Locklear 'checked into a treatment facility last month.' A pre-trial hearing has been scheduled for 7 June. The actress allegedly resisted arrest when police were called to her home in California 'to deal with a dispute' between her and her boyfriend. Locklear was taken to Ventura County Jail and released after posting bail. She was subsequently charged with the misdemeanour counts of battery and resisting or obstructing an officer. Locklear, who was previously married to Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora, rose to fame as Sammy Jo Carrington in 1980s TV show Dynasty. She later appeared on Melrose Place and the sitcom Spin City.
A Marc Chagall painting stolen from a New York couple's home in 1988 will be returned to the family's estate after nearly thirty years, the FBI says. The 1911 painting, Othello & Desdemona, was taken from Ernest and Rose Heller's apartment with more than a dozen other works of art and jewellery. The Chagall was recovered last year after a Washington, DC gallery owner twice refused to purchase the painting. He told the seller to contact the authorities for proof of ownership. 'We took the case from there,' said Special Agent Marc Hess, a member of the FBI's Art Crime Team. For, such a team does indeed exist - it's not an invention of David Bowie on 1 Outside as this blogger had previously believed. The Maryland man who tried to sell the work had stored it in his attic 'for years' in a customised box which 'he fashioned out of a door jamb and plywood,' according to Hess. He claimed that he was 'given' the painting in the late 1980s or early 1990s by 'another man' who is suspected of having taken it from the Upper East Side building where the Hellers lived, prosecutors said in a court filing on Thursday. The couple owned works of art by Renoir, Picasso, Hopper and Chagall, the bureau added. Heller was a retired jewel importer who died in 1998 and his wife died in 2003. The Maryland man, who has not been named, claimed that he planned to sell the Chagall to a potential buyer, but the deal fell through 'after a dispute over his cut of the earnings,' the FBI said. Instead, he kept the painting in his attic and attempted to sell it in 2011 and again in 2017. The painting, which depicts Shakespeare's Othello holding a sword as he gazes down at his bride, Desdemona, was still marked with the names of its owners, 'Mr & Mrs ES Heller, New York,' when the Maryland man tried to sell it, according to the Washington Post. The art gallery owner wisely rebuffed the offer, noted that it required documents proving ownership and referred the man to the FBI, according to prosecutors. 'Well-documented and known art is very hard to move once it has been stolen,' said FBI Supervisory Special Agent Tim Carpenter. 'Gallery owners are our first line of defence in identifying pieces of art that do not have the appropriate documentation and should be brought to the attention of law enforcement.' Prosecutors asked a court on Thursday to approve the return of the painting to the family's estate to put up for auction. The proceeds will be given to the insurance company which paid the theft claim and to charities supported by the family estate. Statute of limitations laws on the robbery have expired, which means that the suspected thief and the Maryland man who obtained the stolen goods will not face charges. The suspected thief was previously convicted in federal court and served a prison term in connection with selling other stolen property, the agency said. Alan Scott, an attorney for Heller's estate and is the executor for Mrs Heller, told the Washington Post 'of all the works that could have been recovered, this is the one that would have pleased them the most.'
The BBC has defended a decision to broadcast a reading of Enoch Powell's infamous 1968 'Rivers of Blood' speech on Radio 4. The Archive On 4 programme, presented by the BBC's media editor Amol Rajan, will on Saturday broadcast the right-wing MP's anti-immigration speech - voiced by an actor - in full, for the first time. The decision to do so was criticised as 'an incitement to racial hatred' ... by someone you've never heard of. The BBC said that there would be 'rigorous journalistic analysis' and the show was not endorsing controversial views - although only the most stupid bloody idiot in the whole wide world would believe that they were endorsing Powell's views, any more than the Discovery History channel broadcasting a repeat of The World At War were endorsing the views of Adolf Hitler. Christ, dear blog reader, some people really are bone thick. Delivered to local Conservative Party members in Birmingham, days before the second reading of the 1968 Race Relations Bill, Powell referenced observations allegedly made by his Wolverhampton constituents including 'in fifteen or twenty years' time the black man will have the whip hand over the white man.' He ended the speech with a quote from Virgil's Aeneid, when civil war in Italy is predicted with 'the River Tiber foaming with much blood.' Despite some attempts in subsequent years to contextualise aspects of the speech due to its classical allusions by Powell apologists, it undeniably used sickly racist language and sentiments (particularly Powell's reference to 'wide-grinning picaninnies'). The Times newspaper contemporaneously declared it 'an evil speech,' stating 'this is the first time that a serious British politician has appealed to racial hatred in this direct way in our postwar history.' After The Sunday Times branded the speeches 'racialist,' Powell sued for libel, but withdrew his legal action when he was required to provide the letters which he had 'quoted' from in the speech because he had promised anonymity for the writer. Whether Powell himself was a racist per se was also the subject of considerable debate - supporters of the MP, including Leftie-icon Tony Benn (who considered himself a friend of Powell despite their political differences), always argued that he wasn't. Others disagreed. The jury remains out. The anti-immigration speech ended Powell's career in Edward Heath's shadow cabinet. The Race Relations Act made it illegal to refuse housing, employment or public services to people because of their ethnic background. Marking fifty years since the speech, Archive On 4 plans to reflect its 'enduring influence and significance.' The full text will be read by the actor Ian McDiarmid, who played Powell on stage in What Shadows?. Labour peer Lord Adonis called for the broadcast to be cancelled and has written to the regulator Ofcom - like a dirty stinking Copper's Nark nitching to teacher, clearly. The BBC said: 'This is a rigorous journalistic analysis of a historical political speech. It's not an endorsement of the controversial views and people should wait to hear the programme before they judge it.' Ofcom said that its position as a post-broadcast regulator meant it would not 'check or approve any broadcaster's editorial content before transmission.'
Eight Cameroonian athletes have gone missing from their accommodation at the Commonwealth Games in Australia, team officials have confirmed. Press attache Simon Molombe told the BBC that officials viewed it as 'desertion' and added that the missing athletes had 'been reported to Australian police.' The three weightlifters and five boxers were last seen at different times on Monday and Tuesday, he said. Cameroon said the group had valid Australian visas until 15 May. Officials named the missing athletes as weightlifters Olivier Matam Matam, Arcangeline Fouodji Sonkbou and Petit Minkoumba, and boxers Christian Ndzie Tsoye, Simplice Fotsala, Arsene Fokou, Ulrich Yombo and Christelle Ndiang. 'The authorities are very disappointed with the deserters - some did not even compete,' Molombe said. 'The pious hope is that they come back to the village and travel home with the others.' The Australian government has warned athletes against overstaying their visas. The Commonwealth Games Federation said that it would 'monitor the situation' but athletes had 'the right to travel freely' on their visas. The Australian Federal Police has been notified of the development, according to Kate Jones, a Queensland state government minister. In 2012, seven Cameroonian athletes disappeared whilst in London for the Olympics.
Yer actual Keith Telly Topping's beloved (though unsellable) Newcastle United passed the forty-point mark and all-but guarantee their Premier League future by beating The Arse, whose terrible away record in 2018 continued. Matt Ritchie's sixty eighth-minute goal earned The Magpies their fourth straight league win and put them on forty one points with five games remaining, thirteen points clear of relegation. They remain in tenth place. Roared on by a buoyant home support, this was another highly efficient, hugely impressive performance from The Magpies. Having started the year in deep relegation trouble, they are now on course for a top-half finish. This was their fourth successive victory and puts them just one point behind a far more expensively assembled Everton side. Given the transfer budget (or, lack of it) at his disposal and the fact they have operated with a squad largely made up of the same players who came up from The Championship last season, Rafa Benitez arguably deserves to at least make the shortlist for manager of the year. The Arse, who reached the Europa League semi-finals with an aggregate win over CSKA Moscow in Russia on Thursday, are yet to earn an away point in the league this calendar year and, on Sunday, Arsene Wenger's always twisty face was even more twisty than usual. Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang and Alexandre Lacazette, playing for the first time together, had linked up for The Arse's opener in the fourteenth minute. The Gabon striker received Shkodran Mustafi's chip and clipped the ball to the far post for the arriving Lacazette to slide in and score. Ayoze Perez equalised just before the half-hour mark, running past Shkodran Mustafi, to delightfully guide in DeAndre Yedlin's cross at the near post. Calum Chambers should have put The Arse back in front towards the end of the half, but he pushed an attempt wide as he slid in to meet Mustafi's header. It took until the sixty seventh minute for either side to have clear cut chance in the second half, with Ritchie then getting the winner a minute later. Nacho Monreal failed to clear the ball and substitute Islam Slimani's header was flicked on by Perez into the path of Ritchie, who coolly steered his shot past Petr Cech. Kenedy almost made it three, his deflected shot looping up and hitting the bar. There were some nervy moments in the closing stages for Newcastle as The Arse pressed for an equaliser, but United - for whom the central midfield duo of Jonjo Shelvy and Mo Diame were outstanding - held on for a vital win.
Elsewhere, Sheikh Yer Man City remain on the brink of winning the Premier League as they bounced back from their Champions League exit with victory against Stottingtot Hotshot at Wembley. Pep Guardiola's side need just three points to be crowned champions, but they will win the title if second-placed The Scum lose to West Bromwich Albinos on Sunday or to Bournemouth on Wednesday. Otherwise a City victory in their next game against Swansea on 22 April will be enough. It was a morale-boosting three-one win for City after the disappointment of Tuesday's defeat to The Liverpool Alabama Yee-Haws in the Champions League quarter-finals. Harry Kane, meanwhile, reportedly claimed not only Spurs' goal but, also, all three of City's. And, speaking of Liverpool, manager Herr Klopp said that it is 'crazy' the amount of goals The Reds have scored this season after an 'exceptional' three-nil victory over Bournemouth took their tally up to one hundred and twenty one in all competitions. He added that their display ended an 'outstanding week' as Mohamed Salah scored his thirtieth Premier League goal to help The Yee-Haws move to within a point of second-placed The Scum. Moscow Chelski FC manager Antonio Conte says his team showed 'the right fire in our eyes' as they mounted a comeback from two-nil down to win at relegation-haunted Southampton. The victory - thanks to three goals in eight second-half minutes - kept alive Chelski's faint hopes of a top-four finish in the Premier League. Dusan Tadic's opener, a placed effort following Ryan Bertrand's marauding run and Polish defender Jan Bednarek's left-footed shot looked to be lifting The Saints out of the bottom three. But, with Mark Hughes seemingly on course for a first league victory as Southampton manager since arriving on 14 March, the entrance of substitute Olivier Giroud, who scored twice, sparked a listless Chelski into life. Burnley's Sean Dyche is refusing to get carried away with the prospect of featuring in Europe next season despite seeing his side take a significant step towards qualifying for the Europa League with victory over Leicester City. Chris Wood scored against his former club while Kevin Long headed a second as The Clarets made it a five straight league wins. Dyche's side are seventh in the Premier League, which will be enough to qualify for the Europa League unless Southampton win the FA Cup. Crystal Palace manager Roy Hodgson said that his side 'did it the hard way' by winning a five-goal thriller against Brighton & Hove Albinos to move six points clear of the relegation zone. In the opening thirty four minutes, Palace scored three goals in a scintillating attacking display but twice conceded their two-goal lead. Huddersfield manager David Wagner said his side's 'job isn't done' despite an 'emotional' late victory over Watford that moved them seven points clear of the relegation zone. Substitute Tom Ince's goal in injury time won the match for The Terriers with their first shot on target against well organised opponents at the John Smith's Stadium. A one-all draw with Everton also eased Swansea's relegation worries. They are now fourth bottom but, with thirty three points, are five clear of Southampton and six clear of Dirty Stoke.
Cardiff left it late but kept themselves on course for a Championship automatic promotion place, while The Middlesbrough Smog Monsters boosted their play-off hopes. Neil Warnock's side had to dig deep to earn a vital three points at Norwich, which moved them above Fulham and back into second place. Fulham could have kept up their own automatic promotion charge but Neal Maupay struck a ninety fourth-minute leveller to earn Brentford a one-all draw - and promote Wolverhampton Wanderings in the process. Boro stormed into the play-off places after coming from behind to beat Bristol City two-one at The Riverside Stadium. Veteran striker Steve Morison struck his fifth goal of the season for Millwall as they came back to draw against fellow play-off hopefuls Sheffield United in the early kick-off. Derby slipped out of the top six, but Burton moved off the bottom and to within five points of safety after a three-one victory over the Rams at the Pirelli Stadium. Blunderland slipped to the foot of the table and remain six points below Notlob after drawing at Reading. The Mackem Filth now have just three games to save themselves from the ignominy of relegation to the third tear for the first time since 1987. Liam Kelly gave The Royals the lead from the penalty spot after Lee Camp brought down Jon Dadi Bodvarsson in the box. Paddy McNair fired home a stunning equaliser for The Black Cats just after the break before Lee Cattermole's first goal since August 2014 put the visitors in front in the sixty sixth minute. Yann Kermorgant restored parity for Reading with eleven minutes remaining to leave Chris Coleman's side on the brink of a second straight relegation. Which, admittedly, would be effing hilarious. Wigan remained top of League One but were forced to settle for a goalless draw at home to fourth-placed Rotherham. Chris Lines volleyed an injury-time equaliser as Bristol Rovers dented Blackburn Vindaloo's automatic-promotion hopes with a draw at The Memorial Stadium. Bradford City recovered from their humiliating defeat at Blackpool by taking a hard-earned point from a fiercely-fought goalless draw with ten-man Shrewsbury Town at Valley Parade on Thursday. The third-placed visitors lost Omar Beckles, who had been booked in the first half, to a red card for his reckless tackle on former Shrewsbury defender Nathaniel Knight-Percival on the hour. Bury were relegated to League Two following a three-two defeat at home by Northampton that also kept the visitors' slim survival hopes alive. Accrington Stanley's automatic promotion bid from League Two is on hold after they were held to a draw by Exeter. Table-topping Stanley needed a win over The Grecians to secure promotion to the third tier of English football for the first time in their history - but a draw means all the focus is now on Tuesday's home game with Yeovil. Luton are also on the brink of promotion to League One after racking up their third successive home win by beating Crewe. Wycombe remain in the automatic promotion places in as substitute Randell Williams' late goal gave them a narrow win at Yeovil. Promotion-chasers Notts County put in a strong second-half performance to claim a comeback win at Colchester United. The Magpies trailed at the break to Drey Wright's opener but scored three goals after half-time to seal victory at The Community Stadium.
Referee Michael Oliver has 'a bag of rubbish for a heart,' according to Gianluigi Buffon after Juventus were knocked out of the Champions League by Real Madrid this week. Oliver awarded an injury-time penalty to Real for Mehdi Benatia's foul on Lucas Vazquez and Buffon was subsequently sent off for his protestations. 'It was certainly a dubious incident. Not clear-cut,' Buffon told Italian television. Buffon also told Italian media that Oliver should 'sit in the stands eating crisps' for 'ruining a dream.' Real had led three-nil after the first leg, but saw their advantage wiped out at the Bernabeu through two Mario Mandzukic headers and Blaise Matuidi's opportunistic strike after Keylor Navas' error. But with the tie heading to extra time, Oliver adjudged Juve defender Benatia had brought down Vazquez in the box and pointed to the spot. Cristiano Ronaldo scored the penalty. Buffon took his protestations too far and was given his first Champions League red card on his six hundred and fiftieth appearance for The Shitty Hunchbacks. The Juve captain said after the game: 'It was a tenth of a penalty. I know the referee saw what he saw, but it was certainly a dubious incident. Not clear-cut. And a dubious incident at the ninety third minute when we had a clear penalty denied in the first leg, you cannot award that at this point. The team gave its all, but a human being cannot destroy dreams like that at the end of an extraordinary comeback on a dubious situation. Clearly you cannot have a heart in your chest, but a bag of rubbish. On top of that, if you don't have the character to walk on a pitch like this in a stadium like this, you can sit in the stands with your wife, your kids, having your drink and eating crisps. You cannot ruin the dreams of a team. I could've told the referee anything at that moment, but he had to understand the degree of the disaster he was creating. If you can't handle the pressure and have the courage to make a decision, then you should just sit in the stands and eat your crisps.' Holders Real reached the last four for the eighth consecutive season, joining The Liverpool Alabama Yee-Haws, AS Roma and Fußball-Club Bayern München in Friday's draw in Nyon.
Sunday morning football is 'a powder keg waiting to explode,' according to a referee who is quitting after allegedly being assaulted by a player for the second time in his career. Ross Hawkes claims that he was attacked by a Brereton Town player last weekend while in the process of sending him off for dissent during a cup game against fellow Cannock Chase League side Talbot FC. The thirty six-year-old claims that he was punched and kicked, leaving him with a cut eye and injuries to his legs. The game was abandoned and Staffordshire Police say it is 'investigating' reports of an assault. The incident comes seven years after Hawkes - who is paid thirty quid per game - was assaulted by another player. 'I have been assaulted twice and it has got worse. The third assault? I do not like to think what that might be,' Hawkes told the BBC Sport website. 'I do not think I can carry on or want to - the risks are too dangerous. Why should I put up with that on a Sunday morning? No amount of money would make it acceptable.' The Football Association says that it has 'offered support' to Hawkes and 'a disciplinary process will take place at an appropriate time.' In a statement, Brereton said 'measures have already been instigated to deal with the incident' and that they 'do not condone any aggressive or disrespectful behaviour.' The father-of-two from Staffordshire, who has been a qualified referee for twenty years, says that he has 'seen a trend' of players 'becoming more physical' towards officials. 'Verbal anger, threats and aggression are not working on referees because we have become immune to it,' said the journalism lecturer. 'You start to see them bumping you, jabbing you in the chest to make their point. To me, the next logical step is what happened to me. My fear is what happens after this? What does it take to realise Sunday morning football has a huge problem. It is a powder keg waiting to explode. Players are getting away with what they like. There is no sense or acknowledgement that this is a massive issue - someone will go a step too far.' Hawkes said that he was 'thankful' that players from both teams stepped in to stop the attack.
Yer actual Keith Telly Topping's beloved (though unsellable) Newcastle United have been fined seven-and-a-half grand after admitting breaching rules over their under-eighteen side wearing kits bearing the logo of a betting company. The Magpies are currently sponsored by China-based online gaming firm Fun88 - much to the acute embarrassment of many of their supporters, this blogger included. Although, arguably, being sponsored by a betting company is slightly preferable to United's previous sponsors, the pay-day lenders Wonga. The Football Association said that Newcastle, who were charged last month, were in breach of their kit and advertising regulations. FA rules say 'services and related activities such as alcohol and gambling' cannot be worn by U18 teams. This is the same FA, presumably, whose second-tier competition - in which a number of under eighteen year olds regularly play - is sponsored by Sky Bet? Oh, the irony.
A council has said its street lights 'do not cause cancer or induce miscarriages' after 'conspiracy stories' spread online. In a Facebook post, Gateshead Council added that the lights 'will not induce nosebleeds and they are not killing all the birds and insects.' Although, to paraphrase the late Mandy Rice-Davies, 'well they would say that, wouldn't they?' The authority said that it was 'reassuring' residents after 'false stories' about it using 5G had 'frightened people.' Though it should, perhaps, have said that 'reassuring' gullible cretins who believe any old shit they read on the Interweb after 'false stories' about it using 5G had 'frightened gullible cretins who believe any old shit they read on the Interweb.' Or, something similar. Its statement came after 'some people' allegedly 'expressed concerns' to their councillor. How many people constitutes 'some people' and what their collective IQ was, the Facebook post did not state. Which is an opportunity missed, one could suggest. The authority clarified that it had 'never' used fifth generation mobile technology. 'Please be assured that there is no scientific basis or credible evidence for any of these scare stories about street lights causing cancer and other illnesses,' its post read. 'We've taken advice from Public Health England who reviewed guidance issued by the World Health Organisation, the International Commission on Non-Ionising Radiation and others and they have confirmed that there is no risk. These tales are completely untrue and you should ignore them.' It said that the post was 'intended to set the record straight.'
An Australian woman who faked having terminal cancer before scamming money from friends of her family has been jailed for three months. Hanna Dickenson, accepted forty two thousand Australian dollars after telling her parents that she 'needed medical treatment overseas.' Her parents had received donations from their friends, a court was told. It heard that Dickenson spent 'much of the money' on 'holidays and socialising.' A judge called the scam 'despicable.' Dickenson had pleaded extremely guilty in the Melbourne Magistrates' Court to seven charges of obtaining property by deception. In sentencing, magistrate David Starvaggi said that Dickenson had 'engaged in conduct that tears at the very heartstrings of human nature. People's desire to assist and social trust has been breached. These are people who worked hard and dug into their own pockets,' he said. The court was told that one person donated ten thousand dollars to Dickenson after being discharged from hospital following his own cancer treatment. Another person gave money on four separate occasions. The ruse was uncovered when another donor 'raised suspicions' with police after seeing pictures of Dickenson on Facebook. Dickenson's lawyer, Beverley Lindsay, argued that her client should be spared jail because she had 'turned her life around.' She also compared the deception to one involving an Australian celebrity blogger, Belle Gibson, who was fined four hundred thousand dollars last year after falsely claiming to have 'beaten' brain cancer. Lindsay argued that her client's offending was 'less severe' than Gibson's. However Starvaggi said that the cases were 'not directly comparable' and that the court needed to 'deter others from engaging in similar conduct.' Lindsay said that her client was likely to appeal the sentence.
A French court has frozen the estate assets and royalties of the late French rock and/or roll singer Johnny Hallyday while it deliberates on his will. The singer died of cancer in December and left everything to his fourth wife Laeticia and their adopted daughters. His older children are contesting this as French law forbids children from being excluded from inheritance. French media speculates that the rock star left up to one hundred million Euros. A posthumous CD, expected to be a big seller, is due out in 2018. The court in Nanterre ruled against that Halliday's two children from a previous marriage and relationship - the singer David Hallyday and the actress Laura Smet - 'having a say' on the release and promotion of the CD. Hallyday, who was hugely popular in his native France, sold more than one hundred million records in a nearly sixty-year career. In 2014 he filed a will in California, where he had a home and was domiciled for tax purposes. While details of the rock star's will have not been made public, the older children's lawyers say everything - including a Swiss chalet and property in the Caribbean - was left to Laeticia, his fourth wife and their daughters, Jade and Joy. His older children say the will contravenes French inheritance laws that bar this from happening. A judge will now have to weigh up whether Hallyday when he died of lung cancer in France, was a US or French resident, thereby deciding if his will breaks French law.
A 'masterplan' to boost Liverpool's 'Be-Atles Quarter' is to be created. The Be-Atles were a popular beat combo of the 1960s, you might've heard of them. Liverpool City Council is proposing a 'regeneration area' around Mathew Street, where the Cavern Club once stood. The aim was to bring an 'enhanced and more co-ordinated Be-Atles tourism offer' to the area, the council said. City Mayor Joe Anderson said that there was 'a need to improve' the area's twenty four-hour appeal as the current offer was 'not at the level it could and should be.' The plans could involve the redevelopment of derelict and under-used buildings and the creation of 'a more defined and useable public open space.' If approved, the regeneration work would focus on the area from Victoria and North John Street to Lord Street and Stanley Street. The council said the city's 'Be-Atles-related industry' had been growing at up to fifteen per cent annually in the last decade and was worth ninety million knicker a year. A spokesman said Cavern City Tours and the Cavern Club, the venue built - more or less - on the site of its namesake nightclub using the original plans, now attracted eight hundred thousand visitors a year. However, a report to the council said visitors were 'increasingly looking for a quality experiential visit' and there was 'a clear need to curate a Be-Atles Heritage offer.' The original Cavern Club opened as a jazz venue in January 1957; The Be-Atles first performed there on 9 February 1961, though alcoholic wife-beating Scouse junkie John Lennon, Sir Paul McCartney and yer actual Sir Ringo Starr had previously taken the stage with different groups - Lennon and McCartney with The Quarry Men and Starr with The Eddie Clayton Skiffle Group and Rory Storm & The Hurricanes. The last of the group's two hundred and ninety two performances at the Cavern came on 3 August 1963. The fact that they played the gaff two hundred and ninety two times isn't so remarkable in and of itself, of course. The fact that someone was counting probably was. In 1973, the buildings above the original club were demolished and the club was closed and filled in with rubble. It was later rebuilt using the original plans and many original bricks and reopened on 26 April 1984. On the other side of the road was the building housing Eric's the nightclub at which many of the next generation of Liverpool bands got themselves together in the 1970s. The council spokesman said the plan would include the granting of compulsory purchase powers and be based on the findings of a 'scrutiny panel' review of the area. The alternative 'do nothing option' would result in 'a missed opportunity to capitalise on the Be-Atles offer and connect with the wider city music offer,' the report said. Anderson said there was a 'unique' chance to 'establish an experience no other city can offer and one which will sustain thousands of jobs, for generations to come.' The proposals will go before the council's cabinet on 20 April, ahead of a public consultation in the autumn.
The door to Bob Dylan's room at the iconic Chelsea Hotel in New York has sold at auction for one hundred thousand bucks. It was one of fifty doors from the hotel, where a host of stars stayed over the years, to be sold. The door to a room used by Janis Joplin and Leonard Cohen during an affair they were conducting, as well as Joni Mitchell, fetched eighty five thousand. A former tenant 'acquired' the doors after renovation work began in 2011. The hotel, built in the 1880s, became a long-term residence for generations of singers, bohemians and writers. Jack Kerouac wrote On The Road while staying there in the 1950s. The door to his room sold at auction for thirty thousand bucks. The hotel also served as a residence for Mark Twain and Tom Wolfe and science fiction author Arthur C Clarke wrote the screenplay for 2001: A Space Odyssey there. Dylan stayed at the hotel in 1965 and, famously, wrote the song 'Sad Eyed Lady Of The Lowlands' for his wife, Sara, whilst there. The most infamous incident to take place in the building came in 1978, when Sid Vicious was extremely charged with murder after his girlfriend Nancy Spungen was found stabbed to death in the room they shared. Other doors to go under the hammer at Guernsey's auction house included that of the actress Edie Sedgwick's room, where artist Andy Warhol filmed Chelsea Girls. It sold for over fifty two grand. The door to Jimi Hendrix's room went for thirteen thousand. The door to a room used by Madonna, actress Isabella Rosselini and filmmaker Shirley Clarke also sold for thirteen thousand. The doors were 'rescued' by a former tenant, Jim Georgiou, who saw them being thrown away and 'arranged' to 'take possession' of them. 'For me they were history and beauty and connected to my heart. They're precious because there are so many people who've been through them,' he told the New York Times. The building was designated a city landmark in 1966 and was sold in 2016 to a group of investors. It stopped taking new bookings in 2011 but a small group of long-term residents are still living on the upper floors while the renovation work continues.
Film lovers are mourning director Milos Forman, who won Oscars for One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest and Amadeus. The Czech-born film-maker, who was eighty six, was one of a small number of foreign directors to enjoy lasting commercial and critical success in Hollywood. One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest starred Jack Nicholson and won five Oscars in 1976, while 1984's Amadeus won eight. Forman's other English-language films included 1996's The People Versus Larry Flynt, which earned him his third best director Oscar nomination and 1999's Man On The Moon. Antonio Banderas, who has said he was inspired to become an actor when he watched Forman's 1979 adaptation of the musical Hair, described him as 'a genius of cinematography and master in the portrayal of the human condition.' Forman was born in the Czech town of Caslav in 1932; after the Nazi occupation of Czechoslovakia, both his mother and father died in concentration camps. (Forman later discovered that his biological father was actually a Jewish architect who had survived the war and escaped to South America.) After being raised by relatives, Forman joined the Prague Film Academy and began writing scripts in the late 1950s, gradually moving up the ranks in the postwar Czechoslovak industry. His debut as director, Black Peter, about a teenager in his first job, incurred the ire of the Communist authorities for its 'irreverent attitude,' but after its prize-winning appearance at the Locarno film festival enabled Forman to continue directing. His next film, A Blonde In Love – inspired by a real-life incident in which Forman came across a young woman who had been duped and abandoned by her lover – established the free-wheeling, semi-documentary style which became his trademark in this period and made Forman a key figure in the burgeoning Czech new wave. It was nominated for the best foreign language film Oscar, as was the follow-up, The Fireman's Ball – a brilliantly scabrous account of a chaotic official social event that again incurred the wrath of the Communist authorities. The Fireman's Ball was released in 1967 and Forman was then invited to the US by Paramount Pictures to make a film in America. After attempting to get the rights to the musical Hair, Forman began work on an original screenplay, for Taking Off. In August 1968 Czechoslovakia was invaded by Warsaw Pact forces aiming to suppress Alexander Dubček's 'Prague Spring' liberalising reforms; Forman opted to stay in the US, where he was joined by fellow Czech director Ivan Passer. Taking Off was a commercial flop on its release in 1970 and Forman suffered a breakdown, living in the Chelsea Hotel in New York but determined not to return to Czechslovakia. At his lowest point he was offered the chance to direct One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, another anti-authoritarian parable adapted from Ken Kesey's novel. Producer Michael Douglas later told the Guardian that the hiring of Forman was on the strength of The Fireman's Ball: 'It took place in one enclosed situation, with a plethora of unique characters he had the ability to juggle.' With a cast led by Nicholson at the height of his powers, Cuckoo's Nest emerged as a massive success, a seminal product of the New Hollywood. It was one of the biggest box office hits of 1975, taking more than one hundred million dollars and it became only the second film in history to win Oscars for best picture, director, actor, actress and screenplay. 'To me it was not just literature but real life, the life I lived in Czechoslovakia from my birth in 1932 until 1968,' Forman once said. 'The Communist Party was my Nurse Ratched, telling me what I could and could not do.' Forman returned to Hair for a follow-up, then moved on to Ragtime, an adaptation of EL Doctorow's novel – the latter secured eight Oscar nominations (though failed to win any). Forman then had another huge success with Amadeus, a film version of Peter Shaffer's play about the rivalry between Mozart and Antonio Salieri; it won eight Oscars, including Forman's second for best director. Valmont, Forman's 1989 adaptation of Les Liaisons Dangereuses, proved something of an anticlimax as another version, directed by Stephen Frears and containing a star-making performance from John Malkovich, had been released the previous year. However, Forman re-emerged with The People Versus Larry Flynt, a biopic of the pornography publisher that Forman framed as another anti-authority fable. His next film Man On The Moon, about the eccentric comedian Andy Kaufman and starring Jim Carrey, was not a commercial success - despite an R.E.M. soundtrack - but has received considerable attention after the recent documentary Jim & Andy: The Great Beyond, which revealed Carrey's unusual performance methods. Forman's final completed film, Goya's Ghosts, was released in 2006, though he did continue to appear in films, including the 2011 French movie The Beloved, which was the closing film of the Cannes film festival that year. When Forman was honoured with a lifetime achievement award from the Directors' Guild of America in 2012, the guild's president Taylor Hackford said he 'finds the universality of the human experience in every story.' Forman was married to the actresses Jana Brejchova and Vera Kresadlova, having twin boys with the latter. In 1999, he married screenwriter Martina Zborilova, with whom he also had twin sons, Andrew and James. He died on Friday in the US after a short illness, Martina told Czech news agency CTK. 'His departure was calm and he was surrounded the whole time by his family and his closest friends,' she said.
The actor Alex Beckett - who played Barney Lumsden from Perfect Curve in the BBC comedy W1A - has died suddenly, his agent has confirmed. Beckett was also known for his theatre work and had been starring in The Way Of The World at the Donmar Warehouse since last month. The rest of this week's shows have been cancelled as a mark of respect. He was described by acting agent Gavin Denton-Jones as 'a wonderful man and a hugely talented actor.' He added: 'Our thoughts are with his family and we kindly ask that their privacy be respected at this difficult time.' The Welsh actor had been playing Waitwell in the restoration comedy by William Congreve, first performed in 1700. It opened to positive reviews last week, having been in previews since 29 March. It has been due to run until 26 May. Shane Allen, controller of comedy commissioning at the BBC, said: 'We're all incredibly crushed to hear of Alex's untimely death. He was a very prolific, versatile and much admired comedy star whose role as Barney Lumsden in both Twenty Twelve and W1A was a key ingredient of their success. We think of him fondly and our hearts go out to his family and friends at this painfully sad time.' In W1A and Twenty Twelve, Beckett's character was part of the quirky brand consultancy agency Perfect Curve, led by Jessica Hynes. Josie Rourke and Kate Pakenham of the Donmar Warehouse added: 'We are deeply shocked by the tragic loss of our dear friend and brilliant actor Alex Beckett, a much-loved member of The Way Of The World company. Our thoughts are with his family and close friends at this incredibly sad time.'
And, finally ...

Saturday, April 07, 2018

Nothing, Like Something, Happens Anywhere

National heartthrob David Tennant and yer actual Peter Capaldi crossed paths at a 'special' screening of the former's new movie, You, Me & Him at the Charlotte Street Hotel in London on Thursday. Luckily, the time-space continuum was not affected by Blinovitch's Limitation Effect. Which was a jolly close escape for the universe and everyone in it, frankly.
Silva Screen will release the soundtrack to series nine of Doctor Who on 27 April. Premiering in September 2015, the ninth series of the BBC's popular long-running family SF drama featured yer actual Peter Capaldi in the title role. This four-CD collection features general cues on discs one and two, the complete score of well-bangin' tunes from the episode Heaven Sent on disc three and on disc four the Christmas Special, The Husbands Of River Song.
Now, beware dear blog reader - there be potential spoilers ahoy (if you're bothered about such things, obviously). It has been a matter of some debate for Doctor Who fans for decades: where - if anywhere - does Peter Cushing's big-screen version of the format fit into the series' canon? Cushing starred in two Doctor Who movies made by Amicus in the 1960s, Doctor Who & The Daleks (1965) and Daleks - Invasion Earth: 2150 AD (1966). You knew that, right? The films - which are both rather fun and are broadly well-regarded by most fans of the TV series - were loose adaptations of Terry Nation's first two Dalek stories from the TV series; they reinvented the alien Doctor as a human scientist - named Doctor Who - and his travels through time and space in 'Tardis' - a self-made craft. Given these deviations from the TV show's official continuity, it has been difficult to place the Cushing movies within Doctor Who mythology. In his novelisation of Doctor Who's fiftieth anniversary episode The Day Of The Doctor, The Lord Thy God Steven Moffat (OBE) reveals that the events of the films do exist within the Doctor Who universe as movies, with Cushing starring in two big-screen adventures adapted from The Doctor's 'real' exploits. 'Seen them? [The Doctor] loves them,' UNIT's Kate Stewart tells Clara Oswald. 'He loaned Peter Cushing a waistcoat for the second one, they were great friends.' The Moff had previously said that he wanted to incorporate this idea into the TV version of The Day Of The Doctor, with plans for UNIT's Black Archive to include posters for the two Cushing films. 'In my head, in The Doctor's universe, those films exist as distorted accounts of his adventures,' Steven told Doctor Who Magazine. 'Sadly, we couldn't afford the rights to the posters.' Also added to the novelisation are brief cameo appearances for River Song - meeting the Tenth Doctor again, thus explaining their exchanges in Silence In The Library - and for Jodie Whittaker's Doctor. Radio Times, helpfully provides a full round-up of all the massively spoilerific plot-points  without warning their readers in advance that they were doing so. Which, if his Facebook comments are anything to go by, appears to have got right on Steven's tit-end. Not unreasonably, either, let it be noted.
With her current round of publicity gigs in connection with Journeyman in full swing, there is yet another very good interview with Jodie Whittaker - this one with The Times' Chrissy Iley - which you can read here. Inevitably, Doctor Who cops more than its fair share of the questions.
Sir David Attenborough has revealed some details of his next BBC documentary series. His new project will follow different creatures across a three year time period, reports the Mirra. 'The BBC Natural History Unit has started following families of animals - cave hunting dogs, lions, chimpanzees,' the broadcaster said. 'We don't know what is going to happen but whatever does, we will be there to show it to you. I am not going to go into detail but I can tell you there will be some fairly dark moments and we wont tidy it up. This is a new concept and I am privileged to have been be asked to write some of the commentary.' The recent Blue Planet II similarly refused to shy away from uncomfortable moments. The show's coverage of what plastic waste is doing to our oceans or how humans have damaged the coral reefs may not have made for easy viewing, but they are important topics to shed a light on. Attenborough was speaking at BAFTA masterclass in London and added that he is 'glad' that politicians are now taking notice of the condition of our oceans. 'If we have woken up, it is only the beginning,' he added. 'We have made a real mess of the world. We really, really have. Something has to be done about it. I am grateful politicians are taking notice. This is serious.'
Filming has begun on a new three-part BBC adaptation of The War Of The Worlds, with an all-star cast. Eleanor Tomlinson and Rafe Spall will lead the ambitious SF drama alongside Robert Carlyle and Rupert Graves. Shooting is underway in Liverpool on the first British television version of HG Wells' classic Victorian SF novel, adapted by Peter Harness. Spall and Tomlinson will play George and Amy, a couple attempting to defy society and start a life together.
This week's 'Question on Only Connect that this blogger got the answer to before either of the teams' - or, in this particular case, 'at exactly the same time as one of the teams' - was this one.
Series two of From The North favourite American Gods has, apparently, started production this week according to a tweet from Ricky Whittle.
With the reboot culture in danger of sinking US TV - Roseanne, Will & Grace, Sabrina et cetera - just about every formerly-cancelled show is currently being rumoured to about to get a revival. Because, seemingly, no one working in American television has any original ideas any more. However, NBC Entertainment chairman Bob Greenblatt has said that the much-demanded reboot of Friends will 'never' happen, according to The Hollywood Reporter. On top of that, don't bet on a Seinfeld reunion either, with Greenblatt confirming that it is also 'virtually guaranteed' never to return. The West Wing, on the other hand, seems like a greater possibility, with Greenblatt claiming that writer Aaron Sorkin would get behind it 'if he weren't busy doing ten other extraordinary things.' Another show which 'could' come back is The Office, albeit presumably without the full original cast according to Greenblatt's reported comments.
'You're one of those people who sits on the floor and goes "Om", are you?!' Have I Got News For You returned to BBC1 this week and the BBC managed to fulfil a long-term ambition by securing yer actual Jezza Paxman to make his debut as host. The former Newsnight presenter had reportedly turned down the gig on numerous previous occasions, one HIGNFY executive producer saying a few years ago that Paxo had claimed he 'would rather have his testicles crushed between two bricks' than present HIGNFY. However, it seems Jezza had a change of heart and on Friday, he appeared in the latest series premiere along with Josh Widdicombe, From The North favourite the brilliant Steph McGovern and regular team captains, Ian Hislop and Paul Merton. And, a very good episode it was too, albeit it did include an entire round on this week's 'completely Twitter-created MasterChef "controversy"' bollocks. Particularly impressive was the bit where Steph described Paxo as 'a patronising git!' He never got called that on Newsnight. Not even that times when he asked Michael Howard the same question fourteen times!
On US TV this week, there were new episodes of From The North favourites NCIS, The Blacklist and Gotham. Reviews of which you can check out - should you wish to be spoilerised, if you're bothered about such malarkey - here, here and here. Respectively.
Deep State, starring Mark Strong, has already been picked up for a second series. The espionage thriller which began this week, which also features Joe Dempsie and Anastacia Griffith, hasn't even broadcast its first series of eight episodes yet but it has earned FOX's backing.
George Clooney has recruited yer actual Huge Laurie his TV comeback. Clooney is working with Hulu on an episodic adaptation of Joseph Heller's novel Catch-22, a dense and biting satire on the stupidity of war. Clooney is producing Catch-22 with his long-time professional partner Grant Heslov and will also have a supporting role in the series as the sadistic US army colonel Cathcart. Cathcart is the mastermind behind an absurd Catch-22 policy which disqualifies any pilots from service if they are willing to undertake a knowingly deadly missions. However, any pilot who is aware that such flights are dangerous - and, as a consequence, doesn't want to do them - is ruled to be of sound mind and, thus, fit for duty. Laurie will be reportedly play one of the air force base's top-ranking officers, Major de Coverley. The series has also recently cast Girls' Christopher Abbott as the novel's main character, Yossarian, a young pilot struggling to keep up with his increasingly-dangerous missions. The novel was, previously, the subject of a patchy movie adaptation directed by Mike Nichols.
ITV is to continue its habit of turning real-life crime stories into dramas by making a series based on the Jeremy Bamber murder case. According to Radio Times, the broadcaster is in the process of creating a six-part series which has the working title The White House Farm Murders. It is being scripted by Kris Mrksa, the writer who recently delivered the BBC's thriller Requiem. The series will dramatise the night of 6 August 1985, when Nevill and June Bamber were shot and killed at their Essex farmhouse. Their adopted daughter, Sheila Caffell, and Sheila's six-year-old twins, Daniel and Nicholas, were also murdered. After a police investigation, Jeremy Bamber - Nevill and June's adopted son - was arrested for the murders. He was subsequently convicted of five counts of murder in October 1986. Bamber still continues to deny that he was involved in the deaths. Mrksa told Radio Times: 'There's a strong procedural line running through it but it's really more about the characters. I think there's a complex story there of the pressures and resentments and dysfunction of families.' An ITV spokesperson told the Digital Spy website: 'We can confirm a drama series entitled The White House Farm Murders is being developed.' ITV is also currently creating a drama series based on the hunt for the serial killer Levi Bellfield, who murdered Milly Dowler in 2002. Manhunt will see Martin Clunes play Detective Chief Inspector Colin Sutton, the lead detective on the investigation.
BBC1's revival of The Generation Game received broadly piss-poor reviews from those critics who expressed an opinion. The show, which has previously been presented by Larry Grayson and Bruce Forsyth, returned with Mel Giedroyc and Sue Perkins on Easter Sunday. Critics described it as 'desperate' and 'a shameless carbon copy' of the versions broadcast in the 1970s and 1980s. Nevertheless, it was a medium-size overnight ratings hit - attracting an average of five million viewers, according to initial figures. It was the second most watched programme on Sunday evening after Countryfile. Richard Osman and Lorraine Kelly appeared on the first episode of the new series, which featured tasks including plate spinning and sausage making. The Torygraph's Gerard O'Donovan gave the show one star in his review. 'If the BBC doesn't think a revival is potentially good enough to beat the Saturday night competition on ITV, then it has no business reviving The Generation Game in the first place,' he sneered. 'As for the show itself, there's little to say other than that it was a shameless carbon copy of memorable moments from The Generation Game of the 1970s or 80s. In terms of what we should expect from prime time Easter television, this fell well short of the mark. And it focuses the mind on what we should be saying to those responsible for entertainment at the BBC: stop trying to revisit the past. Go away and think up some original ideas.' The Times' Carol Midgley awarded it a whole two stars, though she didn't appear to like it any more than O'Donovan did. 'The Generation Game [was] cut from four to two episodes amid rumours that the shows were not good enough,' she pointed out. 'So, what we saw was the cream? The mind boggles. The problem here was that you could almost smell the desperation to make it work, from the canned laughter to the fact that it used penis-based humour in not one, but two of the games. It needs to relax and dial down the gush. Brucie made it look so easy. Didn't he do well?' The BBC defended the show against the accusations of canned laughter. A statement said: 'The show was filmed in front of a live studio audience and the overwhelming majority of the laughter was from the recording.' Writing for the i paper, Jeff Robson agreed that certain elements of the show 'smacked of desperation. It was unfortunate this latest effort arrived so close to the BBC's Bruce Forsyth tribute - a reminder of his gift for generating impromptu laughs (and an occasional frisson of annoyance) from the contestants' ineptness or scene-stealing,' he said. 'By comparison, this felt forced and scripted, another territory for the Mel and Sue brand to colonise post-Bake Off rather than an original updating of an old format.' But the Gruniad Morning Star's Sam Wollaston was more generous, awarding the show three stars in his review. 'Actually, I don't think Brucie and Larry will be turning in their graves. They might even have approved,' he said. 'The resurrection recaptures the spirit of show - a throwback to a simpler time when Britain had neither Talent nor X Factor, and making a mess and peddling suggestive jokes was acceptable as family entertainment. Somehow, it manages to be both a little bit glorious and groansome to the max at the same time.'
Top Gear viewers were in for a considerable shock on Sunday night as a car caught fire mid-filming with Chris Harris and Eddie Jordan inside. The pair were taking the fifty grand new Renault Alpine A1-10 round the Monte Carlo Rally when it burst into flames moments after a warning light popped up on the dashboard, because of an electrical fault. Fortunately, neither Harris nor Mad Eddie were actually killed in the incident.
True Detective's third series is getting off to a rocky start. The long-delayed return of HBO's true crime anthology series has lost its co-director Jeremy Saulnier after filming only two episodes, reportedly because of 'a scheduling clash.' Saulnier was to have shared directing duties with True Detective creator Nic Pizzolatto, but he will now be replaced by Primetime EMMY Award-winning Game Of Thrones and Walking Dead veteran Daniel Sackheim. An HBO spokesperson told The Hollywood Reporter: 'Director and executive producer Jeremy Saulnier has completed the first two episodes of True Detective season three and will be departing the production due to scheduling issues. Daniel Sackheim has come on board as a director and executive producer for the series alongside series creator and director Nic Pizzolatto.' HBO only recommissioned True Detective after keeping the franchise dormant for two years while it could be retooled, following an underwhelmed reception for the second series. The third run will star Mahershala Ali, Carmen Ejogo and Ray Fisher in a story arc based around a missing child case that has repercussions across two generations.
A story in the Observer about Brexit emojis seemingly fooled the BBC Breakfast team on Sunday. The presenters realised that they had fallen for the April Fools fake story after viewers pointed out what reporter Scherzo Primavera's name means in Italian: 'Joke of spring.'
Holidaymakers heading to mainland Europe this summer will be able to watch their favourite shows from home for the first time, including live Premier League football, thanks to a freeing up of regulations allowing access to UK online TV services. From Monday, broadcasters including Sky, ITV and Amazon are allowing Britons on the continent to access their pay-TV subscriptions via online services Now TV, ITV Hub+ and Prime Instant Video. Previously, travellers could not legally access UK TV on devices in mainland Europe, forcing TV fans to either miss their favourite shows, watch local TV or turn to illegal streaming services. While pay-TV services are being forced to provide their customers with access, providers of free TV have been given the choice and the BBC will not follow suit. 'Households are effectively paying a subscription for the BBC so you could ask why it doesn't it fall under the same umbrella [as pay-TV companies],' Richard Broughton, analyst at Ampere Copper's Narked to the Gruniad Morning Star. Who, obviously, were not pushing any sick agenda. Oh no, very hot water. 'The rules encourage free-to-air broadcasters to launch their online services across Europe, the option is available but the rules stop short of mandating it.' Pay-TV services can identify who is accessing their content as they have detailed information, such as a billing relationship, so non-payers are not watching TV for free. Last year, the BBC introduced a registration system for the iPlayer - which includes e-mail and postcode information and a 'pin and pair' system for smart TVs – which has so far attracted twenty five million sign-ups. However, it is not robust enough to guarantee non-licence fee payers would be barred from watching BBC TV for free if it were to be made available in mainland Europe. The BBC has previously said it is 'looking at' whether a verification system is required for the iPlayer to block non-licence fee payers from accessing content. 'We are interested in being able to allow UK licence fee payers to access BBC iPlayer while they are on holiday and welcome the European Union regulation to help make this feasible,' said a spokesman for the BBC. 'There are complex technical issues to resolve which we are investigating and it will be dependent on what legislation is in effect in the UK in the future.' Channel Four and ITV are not making their free services available for access on the continent either also the Gruniad, seemingly, didn't think it was worth stirring up any shit over that. If viewers outside Britain started watching these services en-masse it would undermine the one billion knicker industry which sells British shows such as Victoria, Z-List Celebrity Love Island and Sherlock to broadcasters across Europe. Members of Amazon's video service who are away for the August holidays will now not have to wait to watch its biggest series launch of the year, Jack Ryan, the big budget re-imagining of Tom Clancy's spy, played by Harrison Ford on the big screen. Similarly, TV fans who are away when Sky shows such as the second series of Westworld or Deep State, the MI6 espionage thriller starring Mark Strong will also now not have to wait until they get home to start watching them. Live sport will also be made available to be streamed by Sky for the first time. 'The new portability rules for online content is great news for TV lovers everywhere,' said Gidon Katz, managing director of Sky's Now TV service. 'Holidays are all about unwinding and it is clear TV is a big part about how Brits relax, so it's great news that you can swap your sofa for a sunbed and your cuppa for a cocktail and never have to worry about missing your favourite TV on holiday again.' Netflix allows subscribers to access the local version of its service in whichever country a person is in allowing complete access to all content.
Stranger Things creators the Duffer Brothers are reportedly being sued by a director who claims that they lifted ideas for the hit Netflix drama from his 2012 short film. Charlie Kessler, who has worked on a number of Netflix series including Daredevil and Luke Cage, claims that he screened the film, Montauk, to Matt and Ross Duffer in 2014, in the hope of developing it into a full-length feature. Kessler alleges that the pair then used elements of the work as the basis for Stranger Things. According to the lawsuit, Montauk's storyline features 'a number of elements similar' to those seen in the Netflix series, including children with enhanced thoughts and abilities, a military facility that carries out secret experiments on humans and a monstrous creature from another dimension. The suit also claims that the Duffers' series was given the working title of The Montauk Project, with the series originally set in the Long Island town of Montauk before the setting was ultimately changed to Indiana. Both the series and the film were inspired by rumours of a secret military operation titled Project Montauk, which is said to have conducted experiments on humans. 'After the massive success of Stranger Things that is based on Plaintiff's concepts that Plaintiffs discussed with Defendants, Defendants have made huge sums of money by producing the series based on Plaintiff's concepts without compensating or crediting Plaintiff for his Concepts,' Kessler's suit says. Kessler is seeking monetary damages and a jury trial over the alleged plagiarism. In a statement to the Press Association, the Duffer brothers' lawyer, Alex Kohner described Kessler's claim as 'completely meritless. He had no connection to the creation or development of Stranger Things.' Since its release in 2016, Stranger Things has become something of a pop-cultural phenomenon, turning its lead, Millie Bobby Brown, into an international star. Although Netflix does not release viewership information for their series, figures from data company Nielsen suggested that around fifteen million US viewers watched the first episode of the show's second series in the three days following its release. Stranger Things has since been renewed for a third series.
China's defunct Tiangong-1 space lab mostly broke up on re-entering the Earth's atmosphere above the South Pacific, Chinese and US reports suggest. It re-entered the atmosphere just after Midnight GMT on Monday, China's Manned Space Engineering Office said. Tiangong-1 was launched in 2011 to carry out docking and orbit experiments. It was part of China's efforts to build a manned space station by 2022, but stopped working in March 2016. As to where it made Earthfall, the rather vague 'above the South Pacific' is the line from space officials. US specialists at the Joint Force Space Component Command said that they had used orbit analysis technology to confirm Tiangong-1's re-entry. Astronomer Jonathan McDowell, from the Harvard-Smithsonian Centre for Astrophysics, tweeted that it 'appeared' to have come down 'North-West of Tahiti.' Experts had struggled to predict exactly where the lab would make its re-entry - and China's space agency wrongly suggested it would be off Sao Paulo, Brazil, shortly before the moment came. The European Space Agency said in advance that Tiangong-1 would 'probably' break up 'over water.' Which, given that water covers almost seventy per cent the Earth's surface, was probably a fair-to-middling guess anyway. It stressed that the chances of anyone actually being hit by debris from the module were 'ten million times smaller than the yearly chance of being hit by lightning.' It is not clear how much of the debris reached the Earth's surface intact. Traditionally, thrusters are fired on large vehicles to drive them towards a remote zone over the Southern Ocean. This option appears not to have been available after the loss of command links. Thirteen space agencies, under the leadership of the European Space Agency, used radar and optical observations to follow Tiangong's path around the globe. Tiangong was certainly on the large size for uncontrolled re-entry objects, but it was far from being the biggest, historically: The US space agency's Skylab was almost eighty tonnes in mass when it came back partially uncontrolled in 1979. Parts struck Western Australia but no-one on the ground was injured. NASA's Columbia shuttle would also have to be classed as an uncontrolled re-entry. Its mass was more than one hundred tonnes when it made its tragic return from orbit in 2003. Again, no-one on the ground was hit as debris scattered through the US states of Texas and Louisiana. McDowell believes that Tiangong is only around the fiftieth 'most massive object' to come back uncontrolled. China has launched a second lab, Tiangong-2, which continues to be operational. It was visited by a re-fuelling freighter, Tianzhou-1, just last year. China's future permanent space station is expected to comprise a large core module and two smaller ancillary modules and will be in service early in the next decade, the nation says. A new rocket, The Long March Five - an excellent name of an r and/or b band, one could suggest - was recently introduced to perform the heavy lifting that will be required to get the core module in orbit.
An Indian court has extremely sentenced Bollywood actor Salman Khan to five years in The Big House for poaching rare antelope in 1998. The court in Jodhpur also fined him ten thousand rupees for the crime. Khan reportedly killed the two blackbucks, a protected species, in the Western state of Rajasthan while shooting a film. Four other actors who starred with him in the movie and were also charged with the offence have been acquitted. Khan can appeal against the verdict in a higher court. Correspondents say that he will have to spend 'at least a few days' in The Pokey. This is the fourth case filed against the actor in connection with poaching animals during the filming of the 1998 movie Hum Saath Saath Hain. He has been acquitted in three of them. In 2006, a trial court convicted the actor in two cases of poaching and sentenced him to five years in prison. The Rajasthan high court suspended the sentence the following year and eventually acquitted him in 2016. The state government has appealed against that order in the Supreme Court. The original poaching case against him was filed by the local Bishnoi community, who revere and worship the blackbuck. In December 2015, Khan was cleared in a 2002 hit-and-run case in which a homeless man died and four others were in injured. His car allegedly ran over them while they were sleeping on a street in Mumbai. A lower court had convicted him in May 2015. During his trial, Khan had argued that his driver had been behind the wheel, but the judge said it was the actor who had been driving whilst under the influence of alcohol. Seven months later, the high court acquitted him. It said that key evidence - including testimony from a policeman who had since died - was 'not reliable.' In January 2017, Khan was also acquitted in another case that charged him with using illegal firearms to kill the blackbucks. One of Bollywood's biggest stars, the actor has appeared in more than one hundred films and has a huge fan following across the vast spectrum of Indian society. His fans include the middle-class English-speaking audiences as well as poorer slum dwellers for whom the three hundred and fifty-rupee cinema tickets represent a significant financial outlay. Known for his romantic roles as well as action films, Khan has won several prestigious Indian cinema awards. The eldest of the three sons of well-known screenplay writer Salim Khan, he is a hit on social media too - his Facebook page is liked by more than thirty six million fans.
A spike in violent crime in London saw more murders committed in the city in February and March than there were in New York, figures show. So far in 2018, forty six people have been fatally stabbed, shot or seriously injured in London compared with fifty in the US city. But, whilst New York's rate month-on-month has decreased since January, London's is on the rise. Ex-Met Police Chief Superintendent Leroy Logan said it is 'proof' that 'London's violent traits have become a virus.' Statistics from the New York Police Department and the Metropolitan Police, reported in The Sunday Times, highlight narrowing murder rates between the two cities which have similar population sizes. City Hall says it is 'deeply concerned' by knife crime in the capital, but, along with the Met Police, insists that London 'remains one of the safest in the world.' Usually.
A Kuwaiti court has extremely sentenced a married couple to death for the killing their a Filipina maid. A Lebanese man and his Syrian wife were convicted in absentia. The body of Joanna Demafelis was dumped in a freezer in their abandoned apartment. It was discovered in February, more than a year after the murder seemingly took place. The death triggered a diplomatic crisis between Kuwait and the Philippines. Outrage in the Philippines led to a ban on Filipinos travelling to work in Kuwait. After Interpol launched an international manhunt, the couple were very arrested in February in Syria. Nader Essam Assaf was handed over to the authorities in his native Lebanon, which is reportedly now considering a Kuwaiti extradition request. His Syrian wife, Mona, is currently being held in Damascus. Authorities in the Philippines say that they have facilitated the return of more than one thousand 'distressed overseas Filipino workers' from Kuwait after the body was found. Most were household servants. The Philippines' Department of Foreign Affairs estimates that some two hundred and fifty thousand of its citizens are currently living and working in the country. In many Gulf countries, migrant workers obtain visas under a controversial sponsorship system known as kafala. The system effectively ties immigrants, who often work as live-in maids, to their employers for the duration of their stay.
A former A&E consultant has been jailed for twelve years for possessing firearms with intent to endanger life. Doctor Martin Watt, who worked at Monklands Hospital in Airdrie from 1994, was very sacked in 2012 following disciplinary proceedings. The sixty two-year-old was later found tooled up with three sub-machine guns, two pistols, ammunition and what was described as 'an assassination list' of those he blamed for his misfortunes. He was found extremely guilty last month after a trial at the High Court in Glasgow. The court had heard how he compiled a list of 'bad guys' and hatched a plan to 'assassinate' them. Watt used the weapons for target practice to make himself a better marksman. He was also alleged to have researched the best routes to the addresses of some of the people on his list and compiled a list of some of their car registration numbers. His home in Lanarkshire was raided by police last year 'after a tip-off.' Jailing him, judge Lady Stacey told Watt: 'These are lethal weapons. Not only did you have the guns, you had live ammunition. The weapons were all in working order because you reactivated them. You had them with intent to endanger life and any court must take a very serious view of this. You represent a danger to members of the public. You had researched routes to some addresses, you told the jury you practised shooting to make yourself a better marksman.' The judge added: 'It is sad to see a man who has held position you have, in this situation, but I must protect the public.' She ordered Watt to be on licence for three years after his release from prison. A Serious Crime Prevention Order was also granted restricting his Internet use, travel and NHS visits for five years after his release from custody. Watt, who continues to insist that he did not plan to actually harm anyone with the weapons, smiled as sentence was passed and nodded while the judge was speaking. He had claimed he had merely compiled the 'hit list' as a way of 'making himself feel better' and had 'no intention' of carrying out any attacks. Defence QC John Scott said: 'This is clearly a most unusual case and Doctor Watt is an unusual person to be sitting in the dock at the High Court. He is a medical man who with over thirty years of significant public service in the NHS. He had a prominent role in the campaign to keep Monklands Hospital. He is an intelligent man who has made a positive contribution to society.' Police found three Skorpion sub-machine guns, two Valtro shooters and ammunition including fifty seven dum-dum bullets when they searched his home in Condorrat in May of last year. The court heard that Watt bought decommissioned weapons, legally, from the Czech Republic and put them back into working order in his workshop. They also uncovered the 'bad guys' list, along with information on individual addresses and car registrations. The 'template' for the attacks was said to have been 'based on a film about a group of mercenaries.' Though, they didn't say which one. Watt also carried out target practice with a Skorpion sub-machine gun at a forest area close to a motorway near his home. Nicky Patrick, procurator fiscal for homicide and major crime, said: 'Martin Watt put together the collection of guns for a particular purpose and there would have had extreme consequences had he been able to carry out his intentions. It was clear from the case presented in court that he had gone beyond simply thinking about his actions and there was a clear plan in place to carry out a dreadful event. The prosecution case against Watt was built on the excellent intelligence led operation put together by Police Scotland and colleagues across the country.'
Fewer people's jobs are likely to be destroyed by artificial intelligence and robots than has been suggested by a much-cited study, an OECD report says. An influential 2013 forecast by Oxford University claimed that about forty seven per cent of jobs in the US in 2010 and thirty five per cent in the UK were 'at high risk' of being automated over the following twenty years. But the OECD puts the US figure at about ten per cent and the UK's at twelve per cent. Even so, it says that many more workers face their tasks 'significantly changing.' The OECD says the previous forecasts 'exaggerated' the 'impact of automation' because they had 'relied on a broad grouping together of jobs with the same title.' Its new analysis, by contrast, takes account of the differences between jobs with the same name. For example, the role of a carpenter can vary greatly depending on what type of projects a chippy is involved in, how much autonomy they have and the size of their employer. Some of those roles may be more vulnerable to automation than others. The study did, however, flag up that young people could find it harder to find work in future as entry-level posts had a higher risk of automation than jobs requiring more experience. The research was published last month, but attracted little attention until covered by the Financial Times. The earlier study by Oxford University's Carl Frey and Michael Osborne formed the basis for projections by the Bank of England, as well as a popular 'risk-prediction tool' by the BBC. It also inspired several other studies which, similarly, produced high double-digit estimates of the percentage of jobs facing wipe-out. But the OECD said that 'a variety of factors' made some similarly-titled jobs 'less susceptible' to automation than others, depending on whether computers and other human labour-replacing equipment have already been adopted; the role involves having to deal with complex social relationships, including caring for others and recognising cultural sensitivities and the post requires lots of creativity and complex reasoning or the job requires lots of physical manipulation of objects in a constantly changing work environment. By referring to another recent OECD survey, the organisation was able to take some of these factors into account. Overall, the economic body, which monitors the economies of the world's richer countries, predicted that fourteen per cent of jobs across thirty two surveyed member nations were at high risk over the specified period. High risk was defined as there being greater than a seventy per cent chance the role would be lost to automation. That equated to sixty six million posts, it said. It added that a further thirty two per cent of jobs faced significant upheaval. Its report also highlighted 'variations' between different global regions. Posts in Anglo-Saxon, Nordic countries and the Netherlands were 'less likely' to be automated than those in the South and East of Europe, as well as Germany, Chile and Japan, it said. In addition, the report said that it found 'no measurable evidence' that AI was 'significantly impacting' jobs requiring high levels of education and skill, despite what others had claimed. However, the OECD added that lower-skilled jobs involving routine tasks - including cleaners, agricultural labourers and food preparers - faced 'significantly more impact' than previous waves of automation. It highlighted a further revelation: the risk of automation appears to be highest among the jobs typically done by teenagers. 'Youth and adults do different things at work, even when they hold jobs with the same occupational title,' the report said. 'The warnings in some developed countries that teen jobs have been harder to come by in recent years should be taken seriously and studied in the context of job automation.' Both Professor Osborne and Doctor Frey told the BBC that they had not had a chance to read the study in enough detail to discuss it at this point. But one 'independent expert' commented that any predictions of this type should be treated with caution. 'The problem with all studies attempting to apply empirical evidence to this debate is they fail to take into account the accelerating improvement in the ability of AI systems,' said Calum Chace, author of The Economic Singularity. 'It is a foolish person who declares today the limitations of what those machines will be capable of. It is at least a serious possibility that within a generation - thirty years - many or most people will be unemployable because machines will be able to do whatever they could do for money better, cheaper and faster. We should be taking this possibility seriously and working out what we would do about it.'
A man who choked a woman he had just met during The Sex has been jailed for six years. Mark Bruce had been on a night out in Aberdeen on 3 November last year when he started chatting to twenty-year-old Chloe Miazek at a bus stop. They went to Bruce's flat where they went to bed at 3.30am for the purposes of The Sex. During this, Bruce fatally squeezed his hands around the supermarket worker's neck. Support worker Bruce, who had already pleaded very guilty to culpable homicide, was jailed at the High Court in Edinburgh. Judge Lord Kinclaven said there was 'a significant sexual element' to the offence, adding that a prison term was his only sentencing option.
Anyone watching the Commonwealth Games opening ceremony on the Gold Coast on Wednesday night will remember that one cracking shot during Rikki-Lee Coulter's beach-themed performance. Sharing the sandy stage with the singer in the centre of Carrara Stadium were at least one hundred performers, including dancer Georgia Lear. The nineteen-year-old went from relative obscurity to 'social media sensation' when, halfway through the song, the camera switched to a group of bikini-dressed dancers as they flung their towels over their backs and ran behind their partners, except Lear's towel became tangled as she ran for cover, exposing what appeared to be a bare behind. For mere seconds it was visible to the near three million viewers across Australia tuning in and millions more watching around the world. Speaking to ABC Brisbane on Friday, Lear said that at first she was horrified, but now she can see the funny side of things. 'I had to really quickly move position from one to another on the sand stage,' she said. 'My bikini has gone straight up my bum as I was running, and as I was bent over there was a poor cameraman right behind me who got a shot of everything. I didn't even notice at the time. I came off stage and have seen posts on Facebook about it. I went "Oh God, what's just happened?" I just mooned royalty.' She said that minutes later reality began to sink in. 'Mum and dad were watching at home, mum actually sent me a message going "Do you know what you've just done?" They didn't enjoy that one, but they're having a laugh now, which is good. I've got really supportive friends and family. I was mortified [at first]. But everyone's seen it, it's out there, billions have seen it, so you've just got to have a laugh. There's not much more I can do now,' she said. 'Everyone has a bum, it's fine. Maybe not on TV.'
A man was reportedly hurt near Houston on Thursday after apparently putting the wrong foot forward in a close encounter with a pair of moose. State officials said that he had kicked one of the animals and then was kicked in return. Really hard. Ken Barkley, the Mat-Su Borough's deputy chief of emergency services, said that an initial report of 'a moose attack' came in. 'It was a moose trampled [a person's] foot,' Barkley said. Troopers spokeswoman Megan Peters said that the two moose involved – a cow and an older calf – had 'left the area, after a situation' Peters summed up as 'man kicks moose, moose kicks man.' Asked which moose the man had kicked, Peters said, 'The cow.' Ken Marsh, a spokesman for the state Department of Fish and Game, said that the man reportedly escaped serious injuries in the encounter. 'It sounds like the moose were on a trail and in this case, it sounds like the guy was trying to go through them,' Marsh said. 'That's never a good idea.'
A Phoenix mother was accused of shooting her son with a Taser to 'wake him up for Easter church services' on Sunday, according to reports. Sharron Dobbins was very arrested after she allegedly hit her seventeen-year-old son's left leg with 'a contact Taser,' Fox Ten reported, citing court documents. Dobbins reportedly told law enforcement officials that she 'only sparked the Taser' and didn't actually use it on her son. An eighteen-year-old family member claimed to have witnessed the incident. The woman's son told police that Dobbins did use the Taser, but that he didn't want to testify against her. He did not complain about any pain but had two bumps on his leg where the Taser made contact, according to the reports. Dobbins was extremely arrested Sunday on one count of child abuse. She reportedly released from jail on the condition that she could not 'initiate any contact with the arresting officer' or 'possess any weapons, including a Taser,' a judge said.
A Pennsylvania woman who claims that she was 'trying to scare' her husband when she accidentally shot and killed him has been sentenced to five years' probation. Fifty-three-year-old Catherine Lucas claimed that the gun she was pointing at her husband 'just went off.' And, that was the end of his shit. She said the couple had been 'arguing throughout the night' and that he had threatened her with the gun earlier. Lucas called police on 3 February 2017, to report the shooting. Her husband, forty six-year-old Kevin Lucas, was found extremely dead of a single gunshot wound - to the face - at their Springfield Township home. Prosecutors originally charged her with homicide. She accepted a deal to plead no contest to a reduced charge of involuntary manslaughter on Wednesday. Prosecutors did not object to the sentence.
A Virginia woman was arrested on Wednesday after she reportedly threatened to blow up a Seven-Eleven convenience store. Crystal Mostek walked into the store in Virginia Beach and allegedly placed a device on the counter and told a store employee it was a bomb, WAVY reported. She then allegedly threatened to blow up the store with the item, which was later determined not to be a bomb, according to a Virginia Beach Fire Department spokesperson. Mostek was booked in the Virginia Beach jail and charged with threatening to bomb or damage buildings and possession of a hoax explosive device. During an arraignment on Thursday, Mostek claimed that she is not guilty and the charges are false, WTKR reported. Her attorney is reportedly looking into whether she needs mental health treatment.
A twenty four-year-old Virginia woman allegedly driving drunk in New Jersey over the weekend smashed into two parked cars, then switched seats with her - also allegedly drunk - friend, who crashed into another two vehicles, authorities say. Officers responding to a nine-one-one call in Hoboken early on Saturday found Jamila Banks, of Alexandria, in the front passenger seat of her SUV. Janelle Green, a twenty three-year-old from Newark, was behind the wheel. Police say that both women 'reeked of alcohol' and reported that they had been at a club. They allegedly told officers that they were 'trying to figure out who was less drunk' and who could, therefore, drive; both were over the legal limit - one had a blood alcohol level of 0.17 and the other had one of 0.14, though police didn't specify which was 'more drunk.' No injuries were reported in any of the crashes. Green and Banks were both charged with drunken driving in a school zone, as well as reckless driving and, if convicted, face some potentially serious porridge in The Big House.
A 'dangerous trend among teens' is reportedly 'causing concern among the medical community.' The 'condom snorting challenge' is exactly what it sounds like: Teens are taking to the Internet to post videos of themselves snorting a condom up one nostril and inhaling until it - hopefully - re-emerges into the mouth. CBS News reports that the 'potentially life-threatening practice' dates back a few years but has resurfaced in recent days. Unsurprisingly, doctors and school officials are 'speaking out' against 'the dangerous party trick' and 'urging teens not to partake.' The biggest health risk the challenge poses, experts say, is that it's a choking hazard. 'You are literally putting something down your nose, which connects to your mouth, which connects to your trachea,' Doctor Ammar Ali, an emergency room physician at Beaumont Health, told CBS Detroit. 'I mean, you are risking choking on it.' In addition to choking, Doctor Robert Glatter, an emergency physician at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City, says inhalation of a condom 'can lead to infection' - and it could even get stuck. 'The nasal passages and sinuses have special cells that can be damaged if objects such as condoms are placed in them, potentially leading to a bacterial or fungal infection,' he told CBS News. He also points to a 2004 report published in The Indian Journal of Chest Disease & Allied Sciences, which documents the case of a woman who accidentally inhaled a condom during oral sex which led to pneumonia and partial lung collapse. A more recent report from 2016 found a woman suffered from appendicitis after she accidentally swallowed a condom during oral sex and a piece of it lodged in her appendix. 'Even if you successfully complete the challenge and pull the condom out your mouth, the bottom line is that it's incredibly irritating and a good chance it will wreak havoc on your sinuses, nasal passages, and upper airway,' Glatter added. 'These should be reasons enough to discourage you from attempting this dangerous challenge.' The condom snorting challenge is the latest in a series of dangerous viral trends that have spread online among teens. Earlier this year, poison control centres reported 'a spike in incidents' as the result of a dare encouraging young people to post videos of themselves biting or eating Tide Pods, which contain caustic and toxic cleaning chemicals. When it comes to such challenges, experts urge teens to 'use common sense.' Which might seem likea contradiction in terms, frankly. 'They need to learn from parents and teachers that stunts like this can land them in the hospital, ICU, and it can be deadly,' Glatter told CBS.
Goals from yer actual Jonjo Shelvey and Ayoze Perez his very self helped Keith Telly Topping's beloved (though still unsellable) Newcastle United beat Leicester City and record a third straight Premier League victory in the process. The Magpies started brightest at The King Power Statium and Shelvey's shot from outside the area opened the scoring mid-way through the first-half. Leicester felt they could have had a penalty before the break when Paul Dummett tackled Riyad Mahrez in the box. But, Perez doubled the lead for Rafa The Gaffer's side fifteen minutes from time with a delightful lob over Kasper Schmeichel. In a manner not entirely dissimilar to the way in which Philippe Albert lobbed Kasper's dad, Bacon Sandwich twenty years ago. Jamie Vardy grabbed a late goal from close range for the home side, but it proved to be only a consolation. As much of a consolation, in fact, as the fact that The Foxes' Harry Maguire was given only a yellow card after he punched Dwight Gayle reet in the mush. It was the relentlessness of the visitors' desire which sat at such a contrast to what had happened on the same pitch three years earlier - the day that Newcastle fans produced a banner which stated 'We don't demand a team that wins. We demand a club that tries.' In an incredible twenty five-second spell during the second half, Newcastle's players made nine challenges in a row, five of them proper, old-fashioned bone crunching fifty-fifty and for each one, the roar from the North East corner of the stadium grew. The win - United's first at Leicester since 1999 - took Newcastle up to tenth place in the Premier League, their highest placing since November.
The Scum staged an incredible second-half fightback to beat Sheikh Yer Man City and delay their Manchester rivals' Premier League title celebrations at The Etihad. Paul Pogba scored two goals in two minutes to overturn City's first-half lead before Chris Smalling's header completed the dramatic turnaround. Vincent Kompany had scored a thumping header before Ilkay Gundogan's sublime skill and precise finish doubled City's lead. But City, who would have been crowned champions with victory, will have to wait as second-placed The Scum narrowed the gap to thirteen points ensuring there would be no celebrations on derby day. At least, not in Manchester, anyway. In Essex, Wiltshire, Australia and all the other places that Manchester United supporters live, there was, one imagines, dancing in the streets. Sheikh Yer Man City will need to win at Stottingtot Hotshots next Saturday and hope that The Scum drop points at home to relegation-haunted West Bromwich Albinos the day after to be confirmed as Premier League champions next weekend. The hosts should have been away after a blistering opening period saw them tear The Scum apart and hold a comfortable lead going into the second half. They could have had a penalty within five minutes when Ashley Young slipped and appeared to touch the ball away from Raheem Sterling with his hand after David Silva had crossed in from the left. Bernardo Silva was inches away from poking home shortly afterwards but he failed to get enough on the ball to beat the outstretched leg of David de Gea. Kompany then made no mistake when he leapt highest and beat Smalling to head home from a corner and give City a deserved lead, before Gundogan turned away from Smalling in the box to make it two-nil. Sterling should have scored twice soon afterwards but he fired both efforts over the bar and Gundogan also had a free header from eight yards out which he squandered. City started the second half in similar fashion as Gundogan clipped the post with a curling effort but Pogba's quick double interrupted their rhythm and reversed the momentum. Smalling, who had been at fault for both City goals in the first half, then directed his header past Ederson to round off a tremendous comeback in the sixty ninth minute. That was not the end of the drama, though, as substitute Sergio Aguero had a strong claim for a penalty turned down after a challenge by Young - and moments later players from both sides clashed as tensions threatened to boil over with the pushing and the shoving and that. De Gea pulled off a sensational save in the eighty ninth minute to deny Aguero a late equaliser, before Sterling saw the ball ricochet off his hip and hit the post before the keeper palmed it away.
Elsewhere, The Liverpool Alabama Yee-Haws were held to a drab goalless draw by Everton in a Merseyside derby sandwiched between Liverpool's Champions League quarter-final ties against Sheikh Yer Man City. Herr Klopp made five changes from the three-nil win over City in midweek, choosing not to risk top scorer Mohamed Salah. And, as the game wore on, he substituted James Milner and Sadio Mane, perhaps with one eye on Tuesday's second leg at The Etihad. Christian Eriksen scored twice as Stottingtot Hotshots made it six league wins in a row to increase Dirty Stoke's relegation fears. Burnley scored twice in three second-half minutes to come from behind at Watford and secure a fourth consecutive top-flight win for the first time since 1968. Bournemouth twice came from behind to draw with Crystal Palace, who edged three points clear of the relegation zone. Huddersfield claimed a potentially crucial point in their own battle against relegation as they drew one-one with ten-man Brighton & Hove Albinos at The Amex Stadium. And, West Bromwich Albinos' faint hopes of Premier League survival suffered yet another setback after Swansea came from behind to draw and keep Brom ten points from safety with just five games left and on the verge of needing snookers. The Baggies were on course for a win in caretaker manager Darren Moore's first match after the mid-week tin-tacking of Alan Pardew courtesy of Jay Rodriguez's goal. But, on-loan striker Tammy Abraham levelled for Swansea with a late header.
Aston Villa's automatic promotion hopes were dealt a blow as they fell to three-one a Championship defeat at Norwich City. Which, one imagines, made sour-faced Steve Bruce even more sour-faced than usual. Fulham closed the gap on second-placed Cardiff to two points as Aleksandar Mitrovic's goal earned them a crucial victory at Sheffield Wednesday. The on-loan Serbian striker fired in his ninth goal in nine games to stretch Fulham's unbeaten run to nineteen matches. Matej Vydra scored his twentieth goal of the season as Derby County cruised to a comfortable home win over relegation-threatened Notlob. The Middlesbrough Smog Monsters bolstered their play-off hopes as Aitor Karanka's return to the Riverside Stadium as Nottingham Forest boss ended in defeat. Millwall's terrific form continued with a two-nil home win which saw them leapfrog play-off rivals Bristol City in the table. Sheffield United's play-off hopes suffered a setback as Tom Bradshaw's late goal gave Barnsley a three-two victory in a hard-fought South Yorkshire derby. And, at the bottom, Blunderland squandered a second-half lead at Dirty Leeds and slipped closer to a second consecutive relegation. Pablo Hernandez curled in a superb leveller to deny The Mackem Filth a second away win in a row and leave The Black Cats seven points from safety and staring League One in the face.
Accrington Stanley's owner, Andy Holt, can continue to buy his players burgers but the League Two leaders have been 'reminded of their responsibilities around bonuses' by the Football League. Who, clearly haven't got anything more important to do with their time than waste it on rank, trivial bollocks such as this nonsense. Holt - who seems like quite a good bloke and is well known for his generosity in, for example, buying drinks for Stanley supporters - had mentioned in an interview that he often gives the team two hundred quid to get 'a McDonald's or the like' if they win or draw but that if they don't, they have to pay for their own nosh! The EFL had questioned the deal, which is not part of the standard player contract, to check it met regulations. And, let us once again, simply stand up and salute the utter shite that some people chose to care about. 'The club's response confirmed that no contractual provisions exist to support payments in this manner,' the EFL said. 'However, EFL regulations do not prohibit the provision of subsistence and as long as the club adopts a consistent approach for all matches and arrangements are not linked to success on the pitch, the club can continue to make appropriate provision. The club was contacted as a result of a public comment made by Mister Holt in which he discussed providing his squad with a cash amount to spend on food or drink in the event of the team winning or drawing a match. Had Mister Holt's comment specified that the payment was made irrespective of the result, then there would have been no requirement to question the action, as it is acknowledged that subsistence is required for players after matches. The EFL has reminded the club of its responsibilities in relation to meeting EFL Regulations. It is a matter for the club to ensure it complies with all appropriate HMRC guidance regarding such matters.' Blah, blah, blah. A burger 'bonus' at Accrington would have gone against EFL regulation 61.6, which states that 'full details of all payments to or benefits paid in cash or in kind on behalf of players must be included in the standard contract.' Bonuses 'form part of the contract' and are to be included before the start of each season. However, exceptions may be made if the EFL are written to in advance. In a series of tweets leading up to Easter Monday's home game against promotion rivals Notts County, Holt defended his 'right to buy anyone a burger with my own money' and said that it was 'only the same as paying for a pre-match meal.' He added: 'You have to wonder what these folk would do with their life if it wasn't for my errors of judgement?' Accrington - who are they? - moved significantly closer to promotion from League Two on Saturday with a victory at Colchester. After which, one trusts, Holt bought his lads a celebratory burger and chips and tasty beverage of their choice as a direct way of telling the Football League to, you know, go fuck themselves.
Liverpool Alabama Yee-Haws manager Jurgen Klopp says that a 'few idiots killed everything' by attacking Sheikh Yer Man City's team bus at Anfield on Wednesday. Cans, bottles and flares were thrown at the bus as a crowd gathered in an orgy of sick and outrageous violence with kids gettin' sparked an' aal sorts before The Reds' three-nil Champions League quarter-final win. Merseyside Police are currently investigating the attack, while UEFA have reportedly opened disciplinary proceedings. No players or staff were injured during the incident but two police officers were hurt. Before the match, Merseyside Police had issued a statement saying that the two team coaches would 'not be taking their usual route' because of 'building works and to ensure the safety of fans.' Liverpool also shared the statement and asked their supporters 'to gather to show their passion and support for the team ... in a friendly, respectful and considerate manner.' 'I have to say apologies again for how things happened before the game,' said Herr Klopp. 'It's so strange. You go with your own bus through the crowd and it feels fantastic and it's great. It's support, it's passion. We come into the stadium and the first thing I heard was they had smashed the bus of Manchester City and it kills everything. You can't feel it any more. You give everyone the opportunity to do something good and because of a few idiots it might never happen again.'
US television producer and scriptwriter Steven Bochco, who created some of America's best known drama series, has died aged seventy four. Born in New York, Bochcp helped to define modern TV drama through work like Hill Street Blues, LA Law and NYPD Blue. His award-winning innovations included storylines spread over several hour-long programmes, ensemble casts and a more edgy content than US television had previously been used to. Bochco had been battling a rare form of leukaemia for several years. The writer was nominated for thirty EMMY awards and won ten of them. The seven series of Hill Street Blues won a further twenty six. The son of a painter and violin virtuoso, he grew up in Manhattan. After studying at New York University and the Carnegie Institute of Technology, he went to work for Universal Pictures as a writer and story editor on the detective series Ironside, Columbo and McMillan & Wife. From 2014 until 2016, he wrote and produced Murder In The First, a US police drama starring Taye Diggs and Kathleen Robertson. Former USA Today TV critic Robert Bianco summed up: 'If this is the Golden Age of television, Steven Bochco launched it and helped sustain it. Every great modern drama owes Hill Street Blues a debt.' Bochco is survived by his third wife, Dayna Kalins, his children Melissa Bochco, Jesse Bochco and Sean Flanagan and two grandchildren.
Over the last couple of weeks, dear blog reader, yer actual Keith Telly Topping has found himself involved in a - let it be said, utterly pointless - e-mail discussion with a youngling-type dear blog reader who was convinced that one of the Harry Potter movies which included seven or eight actors who have also appeared in Doctor Who 'must be some sort of record.' This blogger quickly assumed said youngling that it, in fact, wasn't (or anything even close to it). Keith Telly Topping offered up, off the top of his head, Hot Fuzz which had eleven (or, twelve if one counts Jim Broadent's appearance in The Cure Of Fatal Death as canon). 'I suspect,' Keith Telly Topping noted, 'that there may be movies with even more than that. I shall check.' And, indeed, Keith Telly Topping did. In so much as he asked his dear Facebook fiends if they knew of any advance on that figure. So, bigly thanks are therefore due to yer actual Barnaby Salton for reminding this blogger of the existence of the truly horrific 2012 movie adaptation of Run For Your Wife (fourteen), the legend that is Toby Hadoke for 1958's classic A Night To Remember (twenty) and George White for what appears to be the outright winner, The Spy Who Loved Me (at least thirty and possibly more if uncredited extras are taken into account). Unless, of course, you know different. These, dear blog reader, are the kind of things that keep yer actual Keith Telly Topping awake at night. Which probably explains so much.