The third episode of 2012's MasterChef opened with the BBC continuity announcer asking the audience if they were 'hungry for more.' Ya geddit? Yeah. Anyway, we soon learned that there were, indeed (as speculated the night before), only three places open for Thursday's eight contestants due that that bit of rule bending back in episode one. As they prepared for the invention test the camera lingered, lovingly, on a long shot of John Torode in jeans with turn-ups. Style. For God's sake, man, you own two of London's best restaurants, you can do better than that, surely?
First up was Steve Diggle-out-of-the-Buzzcocks lookalike Andrew, who had a very brave choice of shirt (there's not many men that can pull off pink). His dish of roast pigeon with a breaded cauliflower sauce, sweet fig and blackberry sauce and mushroom duxelle got the show off to a cracking start. The dish, John said, 'makes my head spin. In a really good way.' Is there a bad way, one wonders? Well, yeah, The Exorcist, I suppose. So, the dish was either wonderful or yer man Torode had been possessed by the devil, one or the other. 'I love it,' said Gregg just to confirm that John's head-turning experience was probably the former (although, we'll keep an eye on him in future episodes and have the holy water handy just in case). It was, both judges later declared, 'the dish of the day.' Good start. Next up was Bethan who said there was 'no point in playing safe' and went for a lemon and white chocolate meringue tart ('Would you like a cake or a meringue?' 'No you're right, I'll have a cake...') with raspberry coulis and a white chocolate sauce. Unfortunately, by not playing safe, she produced a dish that 'didn't quite work' with soggy undercooked pastry that, ultimately, cost her a place in the next round. Might've been better if you had played safe, Beth. Next up was big hard tattooed security man Jay who looked like the kind of chap that'd be more at home in the middle of a riot than in a kitchen. Just shows, I guess, that looks can be deceptive as Jay produced another of the dishes of the day, a gorgeous-looking pan fried sea bream with clams, sweet potato stack and garlic sauce. John really loved it, Gregg called it 'proper grown-up food' and, as Jay left the room John noted that if good food was supposed to put a smile on the face, Jay had certainly delivered a sodding great beam on his own. Sai chose to ignore her Thai background and cook an English-style dish, pork with rosemary and thyme, wild mushrooms and potato dauphinoise. There were 'texture issues' according to Gregg and John noted that it 'doesn't make my heart jump out of my chest.' But, what really seemed to cost Sai was when the judges asked her why she'd gone for something so alien to her, she seemed stumped for an answer and muttered something about 'falling back on tradition.' Like Bethan, she was eliminated.
Lee missed his calling. On the last series of MasterChef with its X-Factor riffs, his sob story about having recently lost both his job and his girlfriend would've probably seen him reach the semi-final on that score alone. Sadly, this year, they appear to be looking for cooks first and foremost and good back-stories second. Although, to be fair to the lad, his dish of pan fried sea bream, potato and chives with a chorizo dressing had the judges talking about him. For all the wrong reasons, admittedly. His decision to include orange in the dish was the major flaw, according to John who described it was 'not my cup of tea.' Or, perhaps he should have said, not his glass of orange juice. Nevertheless, Lee showed enough promise to earn another chance. As did Margaret who, in best Miriam Reilly-style, said that she was doin' it for the more mature ladies and cooked a stuffed chicken breast with a tomato and red pepper sauce and butter beans. It was fine, if a bit dry. Also into the next round were Jonathan (ballotine of chicken and bacon with lentils and a mushroom sauce - 'tastes good, doesn't look right' said Gregg) and Enormous Ian who was tonight's contestant to bang on, constantly, about 'living the dream.' His dish of sole with clam and pancetta with new potatoes, spinach and a parsley butter sauce was said to have good flavour combinations and was only let down by a few little details (not peeling the spuds very well, for example). So, six were through and they all went off to a couple of professional kitchens (Port Desin and The Swan at the Globe) where only really Margaret had a proper nightmare and most of them seemed to quite enjoy the experience. Again, as mentioned after Wednesday's blog, having the professional kitchen section this early in the competition really hasn't worked this year. It's been the grit in a very tasty sandwich in each of the three episodes. On Thursday, I got so bored with it, I flicked over to Mad Dogs for five minutes. Back at MasterChef HQ meanwhile Gregg was further torturing the language with his statement that 'what will not make it through is safe.' I'm not even sure that actually qualifies as English. Again, the two stand-out plates, by miles, were Andrew and Jay. The former's stuffed saddle of rabbit with late summer vegetables, polenta cakes, butternut squash purée and leek fondue overpowerd pretty much everything else. John said that this made him sad and he did a little (John Simms' Master-style) 'sad face' to prove it. Andrew was philosophical and said that if one small error was what stopped him going through, it would be a shame but he could live with it. He didn't have to. He was through. So was Jay whose pan fried goosnargh duck breast with celeriac purée, baby carrots and crispy shallots and a red wine and current jeux was 'without fault' (Gregg). 'It works' said John, seemingly as surprised as Jay himself was. 'Maybe I've got a chance,' Jay said, when interviewed. 'Who knows?' He paused. 'Well, them two, obviously!' Very good!
Margaret needed something special to acquire a MasterChef apron and couldn't quite pull it off despite producing a very nice looking plum and frangipane tart with rose flavoured ice cream and plum syrup. When she told him what she was making Gregg declared 'right now, I'm in love with her!' Sadly, as Margaret herself acknowledged she'd played a little safe and, in the end, as John said, that slight lack of ambition came through in her dish. Margaret herself was very gracious, unlike several unsuccessful contestants this year, saying that she'd probably just about found her level and that to go any further might've been pushing it somewhat. Also finding his level was Ian who, unlike Margaret went down in flames through over, rather than under ambition. Ian really went for it, preparing a lobster salad with tempura squid, basil and cantaloupe caviar and watermelon. John thought that dish, in concept, sounded like 'the fishmonger's crashed into the fruit and veg stall.' The dish was 'daring' both judges said but, one felt that was a little bit like those politicians who use the word 'brave' to describe the actions of a colleague when they actually mean 'reckless.' 'Not quite balanced properly,' noted Gregg. So, Ian was also out. The final place in the twelve was thus between Jonathan and Lee. The former felt he had 'dodged a bullet' in the previous round although that felt harsh as he'd clearly been one of the better cooks on display. He showed amazing bravery (and, in this case, whilst it does mean reckless it also means, actually, brave) with Pigeon-en-croute with confit pigeon leg, celeriac purée and fondant potato. He also became the first ever contestant in amateur MasterChef history to make his own puff pastry. And he pulled it off. And then spoiled it by undercooking his potato. As he sat, miserably, in the waiting room the viewer could see him, metaphorically, kicking himself at such a 'schoolboy error.' He is 'a class act' John suggested, 'but he made a silly mistake.' And then there was Lee whose pan roasted venison with sweet and sour red onion and a chocolate and stout sauce was the final dish. 'And, not an orange in sight,' said Gregg, happily. The dish was good. It was very good. But, said John, the onion was 'too powerful for the venison.' 'I don't want to go home.' said Lee. But, home he went. Interviewed afterwards, Lee was still being positive. 'I don't think this is the end,' he said. But, it was.
Twelve finalists will now start their battle for the MasterChef title next week, and they'll do so by cooking for the previous winners - Tim The Mad professor, lovely Dhruv, Mat, Thomasina, Big Fat Cuddly Claire, Aussie Ash the lot of them. Tough gig! And, hopefully, brilliant television.
